Monday BP, 10/22/18

With the start of the World Series just about 33 hours away, it’s a good time to take stock of what really matters: the Dodgers losing. Sure, everybody wants to talk about the matchup itself and where each team’s strength lies, but that’s missing the point about the Dodgers losing. See, the Dodgers should lose the World Series because they are the Dodgers. They do not do anything beyond being the Dodgers. That does not make the world a better place, it makes the world a world with the Dodgers in it.

Do we need to spend the next week marveling at the Dodgers for being the Dodgers? I say no. Does this mean I think we should be spending time talking up the amazing 108 wins of the Boston Red Sox? No! Stay on subject here. The Dodgers are still playing baseball, and that’s the world’s common enemy. The Dodgers are bad but the Dodgers are good enough to still be playing. This should concern us all. There’s no room for admiration or even distant respect — that’s giving the Dodgers power. Why do you want to give the Dodgers power?

We spend all day online tearing each other down and talking about the things we don’t like and why everything that’s good is actually bad, so what’s wrong with directing all that energy at the Dodgers? For just seven more days. What’s the matter with that?

But, Bryan — which, by the way, you suck and Grant needs to come back — I want the Giants to be vertically integrated and run with the same bloodless, rich efficiency as the Dodgers.

No, Internet Voice In My Head, you want the Dodgers to lose.

Hey Idiot, I hate the American League Clownball Galoot Softball teams. Go National League!

You just said “Go Dodgers!” You’re a Dodgers fan.

There’s nothing good about Boston. Have you seen THE TOWN? Forget it, B. It’s Afflecktown.

The majority of people in LA rooting for the Dodgers are actually from “back east” anyway. Rooting for the Red Sox is rooting for the Dodgers.

This is what I’m saying. Don’t root for either team to win, root for the Dodgers to lose. Simple.