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San Francisco Giants Link Dump, 9/26

I wish that we could dump about links, but there, that's the problem

If I cropped it differently, this would be a good time for a Brazzers joke
If I cropped it differently, this would be a good time for a Brazzers joke
Ed Szczepanski-USA TODAY Sports

So I'm basically gonna spend the rest of my life watching Hunter Pence's speech. No regrets.

Mr. November
It is the Derek Jeter Appreciation Epoch, as it has been since time immemorial, as it shall be until the Earth is a cold lifeless husk orbiting a dead star. And while Joe Posnanski focuses on Jeter in Game 4 of the 2001 World Series, the real star here is the aside about Bip Roberts during the 1997 World Series. According to Posnanski, Bip approached him and, unprompted, just started tearing into the Royals as an organization. While that looks pretty stupid NOW, since their plan to return to the playoffs has come to fruition after a mere 17 years, at the time Posnanski was elated to have something to write about.

Bip Roberts didn't just win innings that day, friends. Bip Roberts won hearts.


Derek Jeter Will Go Down As One Of The 500 Best Players Of All Time
Of course, the Derek Jeter does deserve to be appreciated. After all, he was a very good player, whose legacy (as this article points out) is at least as strong as that of Luis Soto and Roger Peckinpaugh. This is a pretty controversial take, though, so don't go in if you're easily offended.


And while we're on the Jeter kick, let's not kid ourselves about his walk-off single last night. Sure, it was a stirring moment that will be remembered for a very long time, like Ted Williams's homer in his final at-bat, but was there more to the story? Are we all just puppets, unable to see the strings as we dance for our masters? Did the Baseballuminati really have so little respect for us that they thought we wouldn't notice their scheme? Because we know. We know, OBAMA.


Songs of October: A Retrospective (Because Why Not?)
Did you know that MLB has only been using songs to promote the postseason since 2007? What did they even do before that? We have our fun little jokes about THIS TRAIN being full of lighted mups a million miles away, but without those songs would anybody have even watched the postseason? There are probably a lot of people who were on the fence about it who were all "IT WAS WRITTEN IN THE STARS I HAVE TO WATCH." We can only hope that this year's AC/DC song, which Grant was eerily close on, has the same effect.


How Pokemon Cards Affect The Minds
Oh man, the restraint I have to show to not quote this entire thing. Here's just a taste:

What if children try to follow this advice? What if they carry their favorite monsters like magical charms or fetishes in their pockets, trusting them to bring power in times of need?

Matthew's tutor had already warned her that the Pokemon craze could stir interest in other kinds of occult role-playing games such as Dungeons and Dragons.

Strange as it may sound to American ears, demonic possession is no longer confined to distant lands. Today, government schools from coast to coast are teaching students the skills once reserved for the tribal witchdoctor or shaman in distant lands. Children everywhere are learning the pagan formulas for invoking "angelic" or demonic spirits through multicultural education, popular books, movies, and television.