Hey, remember how Andrew McCutchen got hit by a pitch in the back because Kirk Gibson was being a whiny baby, and then he got injured and it was supposed to be his oblique? Now it turns out he has a broken rib, and apparently this wasn't Kirk's fault. All he did wrong was intentionally cause someone pain who didn't have it coming. That should help him sleep at night.
Jake Peavy may be key to the Giants' playoff run
Over at Sports on Earth, Wendy Thurm takes a look at how Jake Peavy is . . . well, it's all there in the title. But reports yesterday were that SoE is letting go a lot of great sportswriters, because who even wants to read a bunch of in depth journalism from talented writers about sports, anyway? No, the real money's in finding links on the Internet and writing several sentences about them. That's what the world needs more of.
Get the popcorn: more Biogenesis-connected players to be revealed
This year has been almost wholly devoid of steroid outrage, which is a travesty. How am I supposed to enjoy baseball if I'm not constantly calling players out for being drug-addled shams whose very existence is an affront to decency? Do you people realize what we've had to endure this year, actually watching the games? It's a miracle nobody laced Jered Weaver's Sun Chips with The Clear just so we could have something to yell about.
Mets Accidentally Hand Out Free Phillies Truck Instead of Mets Truck at Game
The great thing about the Mets is that they're constantly metsing in ways that it would never occur to me to even imagine. If I had been asked to come up with ways that this promotion would be metsed, I would have thought of the following: Truck only comes with three wheels, truck carries tiny pornographic magazines, trucks not given out because someone forgot, trucks accidentally given to Bobby Bonilla in lieu of money, trucks actually yachts with wheels hastily glued on. Phillies logo though . . . that's some next level metsiness. Kudos.
Really trying to understand why I was so wrong about NY Mets' Lucas Duda
The particular players involved in this story aren't especially interesting -- neither Lucas Duda nor Ike Davis is especially relevant to my life, other than in Duda's ability to get Camptown Races stuck in my head. But the interesting part of the article is the examination of the subtle biases that reporters must feel every day. For a more Giants-centric example, the reason Schulman loved Bengie Molina is that Bengie frequently sang the national anthem in the locker room, and never took more than 59 seconds.
Woman uses Nike+ to draw miles-long penises
They had me at "Penises"