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San Francisco Giants Link Dump, 5/19

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My cat's breath smells like link dump.

Any excuse to talk about him. Any. Excuse.
Any excuse to talk about him. Any. Excuse.
Ezra Shaw

Won't you join me in saying a mournful farewell to Tim Lincecum's mustache? Goodbye, friend. We hardly knew ye.

River Cats eyeing Giants affiliation
Well this sure is an exciting possibility, but it worries me. If Oakland loses Sacramento as a AAA affiliate, then perhaps A's fans will begin to harbor some sort of grudge against the Giants related to the territory their respective teams control. And if this happens, it is possible, however unlikely, that A's fans will start to take out these frustrations on individual Giants fans with whom they happen to engage in otherwise civil discussions on the Internet. Truly, this would be an unfathomably bleak dystopia.

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Best (MLB) Month Ever: If You Like Barry Bonds, You’ll Really Like This Baseball List
Here's an easy way to get into the link dump: Write a list about baseball history where the greatness of Barry Bonds gets multiple mentions and highlights. Especially highlights. Good god, I love Barry Bonds highlights.

This is the part where I would normally make a joke, but I'm too busy watching Barry Bonds hit baseballs and you should be too.

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Mitch Williams is the classiest man in the world
I feel like if you coach a team of 10-year-old, and you order a pitcher on your team to throw at one of his opponents, and you call a kid on the other team a derogatory name, you might not be the best coach in the world, even if you pitched in the majors. I don't care how much controversy I'm bringing by saying it, but I feel like I have a responsibility to stand up for the silent majority who feels strongly about this: Don't...do that.

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Hero cat to throw out first pitch at ballgame
I'm really looking forward to seeing how Tara throws the ball, though I'm mentally preparing myself for the possibility that the team will just invite the kid she saved out there to really throw the pitch, maybe with Tara playing with a different baseball simultaneously. Let's just be clear: anything short of an actual cat throwing an actual baseball from the mound to near the plate will be a massive disappointment, just like you, entire city of Bakersfield.

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Rare footage shows FDR walking at 1937 All-Star Game
Wait, if you're President do you get free tickets to the All-Star Game? Oh man, no wonder people want this job! You get to meet all the biggest stars of the day, like Lou Gehrig and Jimmie Foxx, and you get to cover up your polio, and then you get to fight wars and personally shoot Hitler and walk on the moon. Just proof positive that Franklin "Teddy" Roosevelt led a super fascinating life.

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Mets accidentally email Sandy Alderson's credit card info to beat writers
I love you, Mets.