San Francisco Giants Link Dump, 4/10

I'm beginning to suspect some sort of connection between Tim Lincecum pitching to Paul Goldschmidt and Giants pitching giving up lots of runs. I'll investigate further, and let you know the results.

Pinch-blogging: Brandon Hicks
Brandon Hicks writes the Belt & Crawford blog for a day. He doesn't do a bad job or anything, but...where are the movie reviews? Where is the ability to visualize his flowing locks as he writes the blog? Where is the hilarious yet adorable earnestness? Where is the same awkwardness we see on the field, but now in prose form?

I...might be valuing the wrong things here.

Is Arizona’s Front Office Reloading the Diamondbacks or Destroying Them?
Let's ignore the results of the game last night and focus more on the long-term, because the team seems to have not only regressed over the last few years, but traded away young players in bunches, scattering talent all over the country like Pat Burrell's condoms. But have they done as badly as most people think? Probably not, only because so many of the prospects they've traded have turned out to be Sean Burri. Though if their player development system is failing so badly, maybe the front office IS terrible? I dunno, man. This is hard.

The Braves Set The American Flag On Fire At Their Home Opener
#barves

Pitcher Contracts, Classified
Over at Fangraphs, Wendy Thurm looked at the contract of every pitcher in the major leagues (and every position player, too) to classify what kind of contract they're under. This took tons of work, and I've run worldwide empires in multiple video games, so I know work.

New Spillymeal!
If I had one wish, I'd like to imagine I would use it on world peace or Russell Wilson falling down a lot or something equally beneficial to the world. But I have this nagging feeling that I would mandate that Spillyfood and only Spillyfood would be served at Dodger Stadium. The only real minus is that in terms of taste, aesthetics, and nutrition, it would be an improvement over Dodger Dogs.

The Game of Thrones theme, as performed by goats
The two biggest discussion topics on this blog are Game of Thrones and goats, so this is the most relevant link possible.