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Michael Morse signs with Marlins

Postseason hero and gigantic human being Michael Morse has traded in the orange and black for ... turquoise and, uh, electric persimmon.

Ed Szczepanski-USA TODAY Sports

The Giants were never going to sign Michael Morse. That was clear when they decided to start a 31-year-old first baseman in the outfield instead of Morse throughout the postseason. The Giants took a chance on Morse, and it paid off handsomely, but by the end, the defense was just too sketchy. He was going to go to an American League team, and ...

The Marlins? Gross.

The Marlins don't really buy into that whole "defense" thing, as they're planning to play Morse at first base, across the diamond from Casey McGehee, down the road from Jarrod Saltalamacchia. The Marlins are also engaging in a fascinating win-now experiment, making at least one ... let me check ... no, several more moves than the Giants. They've acquired Dee Gordon. They've acquired Mat Latos. Now they have Morse to balance the likeability ledgers.

Morse is more than a trivia question, but it's still cool to be one of the three answers to "Who had the game-winning hit in each of the World Series clinchers?" Madison Bumgarner stole the show for that game, though, so it's likely that Morse's most memorable Giants moment was this:

What a moment. There are players who sign two-, three-, and four-year contracts with the Giants, getting paid all sorts of millions, who will never come close to breathing trace amounts that sort of hero dust. Morse was here for a year, and he did that. Along the way, he hit several other dingers, acted like a delightful goofball, and made us all smile. He was the guy in college who got homework help from the nerds without asking, just because they wanted to be around him.

He didn't make sense for the Giants as a baseball player in 2015, but he'll be on a short list of the most popular one-year Giants in history. There might be a 500-mile gap between him and second place. Thanks, Michael Morse. Now go make those stupid nuclear flamingos dance. Make them dance often. Just not, you know, when the Giants are in town.