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With the Winter Meetings going on, it's easy to forget that there are sportswriters filling out their Hall of Fame ballots as we speak. Now, I don't have a vote – if I understand correctly, I have to write here for at least another six months before I get one – but it's a good thought exercise to think about who I'd vote for if I did.
1. Farhan Zaidi
Is it a stretch to say that Zaidi is the greatest GM in the history of baseball? Look at the moves he's made – upgrading second base and getting prospects for it, getting Jimmy Rollins to play shortstop, signing Brandon McCarthy to replace Dan Haren . . . this is an all-time great offseason by an all-time great GM and I'm comfortable crowning his ass.
2. Andrew Friedman
When you look at the transformation the Dodgers have undergone this offseason, there's one word that comes to mind: Cooperstown. A Hall of Fame front office just acquired Hall of Fame players for what will certainly be a Hall of Fame season. A "Hall of Fame season" isn't technically a thing, but after this year, it will be, and it's all thanks to Andrew Friedman.
3. Magic Johnson
It was Magic who made this all happen. It was Magic who brought in all the talented front office people, who wrote all the checks, who inspired his players with eloquent yet fiery speeches (I assume), and it is Magic who holds the whole thing together. Isn't that everything you want from an owner? I say it is.
4. Jimmy Rollins
He's a world champion, a former NL MVP, one of the greatest shortstops ever, and now he's coming to LA. This is, frankly, terrifying. Since old players don't decline but instead stay great forever, it's fair to say that Jimmy Rollins is the long-term answer for LA at shortstop, and Giants fans should get used to seeing him beat them. After all, when's the last time the Giants beat a Jimmy Rollins team in an important series? I can't think of a single example.
5. Andrew Heaney
Uh, never mind
5. Howie Kendrick
Do you remember how good the Dodgers were last year? Well, if you replace Dee Gordon and Hanley Ramirez with Jimmy Rollins and Howie Kendrick – which is totally how projections work – Fangraphs says they gain a win and a half! The Dodgers already won more games than the Giants last year, and now they're going to win even more games than that? The Giants are doomed, people. Doomed.
6. Brandon McCarthy
Forget the injury concerns. Forget the bad year-and-a-half in Arizona, which two good months in New York totally wiped out. Forget the 4-year contract that seems like it's far, far too long. What McCarthy's HoF candidacy comes down to is this: Has any baseball legend been funnier on Twitter? I submit that not one of them ever has. If that doesn't get you a plaque, I don't know what does.
7. Whoever the Dodgers got for Matt Kemp
I dunno, man, I wrote this last night and then went to bed when reports still said it was "on the verge" of being done. I'm sure whoever they got was the second coming of Robin Yount. Was it Yasmany Grandal? Then he's the second coming of Roy Campanella. Good enough. He gets my vote.
8. Andrew Friedman, again, just to be sure
There's a storm coming into San Francisco, and it's called Hurricane Andrew!
/googles
I'm still comfortable with that reference.
9. Barry Bonds
I mean, duh