Giants scout Odrisamer Despaigne, Cuban pitcher

THE GIANTS ARE INTERESTED IN ALFREDO DESPAIGNE. THE GIANTS ARE INTERESTED IN ALFREDO DESPAIGNE. FROM AN MLB TRADE RUMORS REPORT:

According to Ebro, the Phillies, Yankees, Giants, Mariners and Mets have all seen Despaigne throw in Barcelona

YESSSSSSSS. Sorry. But Despaigne is one of my absolute heroes, and I'm completely fascinated by him. He's a 5'8" dinger machine who ... wait, why does that quote mention the Giants saw him throw, then? From the source article:

De hecho, ya varios conjuntos como los Filis, los Yankees, los Gigantes, los Marineros y los Mets, entre otros, lo han visto en España, pero ahora en México todo tendrá un carácter más oficial

Help, Google Translate!

In fact, several sets as the Phillies, Yankees, Giants, Mariners and Mets, among others, have been in Spain, but now in Mexico all have a more formal Despaigne, 26, joined Gerardo Concepcion Aroldis Chapman and two lefties who also left the concentration of the Cuban team in Rotterdam in the editions of 2009 and 2011, respectively. The first is the star closer for the Cincinnati Reds and the second signed a five-year, $6 million with the Cubs in March 2012.

Oh. Thanks, Google.

The Giants didn't watch Alfredo Despaigne. They watched Odrisamer Despaigne, the 27-year-old right-handed starting pitcher. Aw, man.

Wait, that's still kind of interesting. This Despaigne defected in July, and he's been establishing residency in Spain. I have no idea who this guy is or what his contract will be for. Is this a potential steal, like Aroldis Chapman was? Or is this going to be an Osvalboondoggle?

No idea. No one has any idea. Unlike Jose Dariel Abreu, this Despaigne didn't play in the WBC, so there isn't any good video. And unlike Miguel Alfredo Gonzalez, there isn't even a crappy YouTube video that's worth anything. You can find a strange clip from a Cuban newscast in this post, which also offers the following scouting report:

Overall, Odrisamer has a strange profile. His K-rate is slightly better than Gonzalez's, but his control is easily the worst of the three. What he does seem to do well is prevent runs. He sports a lower hit rate against than either of the other two, and his home run rate is also very good. Who knows? Maybe he throws a knuckleball.

A knuckleball? Six years, $100 million.

Alas, he probably doesn't throw a knuckleball. But he doesn't have a single scouting report on the Internet. That's beyond odd, even for a Cuban player. Here's Despaigne's full scouting report:

Throws right-handed.

It's remarkably similar to the beginning of Jesse Foppert's and Tim Wakefield's scouting report, actually. But I'm not going to argue on behalf of Despaigne unless the Giants sign him. That will mean they liked what they saw, and the Giants are still a smart organization when it comes to finding and maintaining pitchers, for the most part. So if the Giants sign Despaigne, it's a fantastic move. If they ignore him, that's because he deserved to be ignored.

Say, that's sort of the logic that most people use when forming political beliefs. Are my people for it? THEN I'M FOR IT, AND I ALWAYS HAVE BEEN. Simple.

The Giants have watched Odrisamer Despaigne pitch. You tell me if that's a good thing. No, seriously, Giants. tell me.

Boy, some of my favorite pitchers have been right-handed. I hope he's like them.