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Winter Meetings preview

Thearon W. Henderson

Here's how I expect the Winter Meetings to go for the Giants:

Sabean: /fidgets

Sabean: /plays with watch

Sabean: /drums fingers on desk

Sabean: /calls Marco Scutaro's agent

Sabean: Hey, Barry, have you thought about our offer for Marco yet? Cool, cool. Just checking.

Sabean: /hangs up

Sabean: /plays Snake on his RAZR.

Sabean: /texts Angel Pagan's agent

Sabean: /plays Snake on his RAZR for, like, three hours

I'm sure there will be a table dance or two at night, but during the day I'd wager the priority is re-signing Scutaro and Pagan. That is, unless the priority is on re-signing Pagan and Scutaro. Should be a nice, calm Winter Meetings, with Pagan and Scutaro rumors interrupted only by the occasional Shane Victorino-inspired nonsense/nausea.

Except Sabean is always working on something, the cagey feller. Last year at this time, the Giants swung the deal that brought Pagan to the Giants in the first place. We weren't expecting that. I was pretty comfortable with Andres Torres and Ramon Ramirez. Sabean wasn't, and he was right. The cagey feller.

Before last year, Sabean, signed Shane Loux during the Winter Meetings. And in 2009, the Giants took Steve Johnson in the Rule 5 Draft, a move that was almost identical to their memorable Luis Perdomo Rule 5 snag in the 2008 Winter Meetings. Let's see, Justin Leone to a minor-league deal in 2007, LaTroy Hawkins for Steve Kline and a big Mark Sweeney deal in 2006. Unless it was Mike Sweeney. I still can't remember which one the Giants had, and it's getting worse as the years pass.

Okay, so maybe the Giants usually aren't that active at the Winter Meetings. It's like the other GMs are all jacked up, like a bunch of college kids at Ft. Lauderdale or Lake Havasu for the first time. Sabean stays in his hotel room doing things with roster dust that the weekend warriors haven't even thought of. That's just how he lives his life 365, y'all. This special gathering is a farce when you're as hardcore as Sabes.

So to the odds:

Angel Pagan rumors: 1,104 to 1,103
Angel Pagan signing with the Giants: 4 to 1
Shane Victorino showing up at your house and pooping in your sink: 4 to 1
Shane Victorino signing with the Giants: 10 to 1
Big, wacky, and unexpected Giants trade: 25 to 1
Josh Hamilton signing with the Giants: 1,000 to 1

Something like that. That's just for the week, not overall. I'd give the Giants better odds for signing Pagan, for example. And if we're including both the bathroom and kitchen sinks in the description, I'd go with even money on Victorino. He's probably behind you right now. Don't turn around, it'll only upset you. Just let him do his thing.

Comment starter: Do you expect wackiness? Or will this be a typical Winter Meetings for the Giants?