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Jeremy Affeldt re-signs for three years

"Honey! Throw out the frozen patties!"

Doug Pensinger

The formula is simple:

  • Win a championship
  • Bring everyone back
  • Win a championship two years later

It's a verifiable, tested formula. And I currently don't have any plans for November, 2014. So how can you argue against this? From Jon Heyman:

October hero Jeremy Affeldt appears headed back to the World Champion San Francisco Giants on a three-year deal.

Affeldt and the Giants have agreement on terms of a new deal, sources say. It is expected to come in at about $18 million over the three years. The sides may just be awaiting the results of a physical.

Three years and $18 million makes me nervous for a reliever. I'd be happier with three years and $12 million, which really isn't that different, I guess, at least as far as practical roster-building is concerned. At some point, an extra $2 million on the payroll will make the Giants reluctant to pay Free Agent X, and we all know how much we want that guy. He's Speed Free Agent's older brother, you know.

That tipping point isn't here yet, I'd gather. And all things being equal, how can you not like Affeldt on a roster? Lefties who can harass left-handed hitters are great, but the ones who can fluster right-handed hitters are pretty rare. In the playoffs and World Series, it was nice to have a lefty who could pitch a full inning or two. It allowed him to do things like this:


That's the heart* of the Tigers' order whiffing through Affeldt's hard sinkers, curves, and splits. Toward the end of the season, he was throwing as well as he had in a Giants' uniform, which is to say he was throwing exceptionally well.

He's also a goofy bastard.


That makes me think that Posey's something of a target because of his default serious-face, and that makes me laugh even more at the GIF, which I've watched 495 times, along with the revenge-based sequel.

Affeldt's injuries over the last year: Cutting himself with a knife while prying frozen hamburger patties open, catching his kid, and hurting his wrist while avoiding a foul ball in the dugout tunnel. Next up: Cinnabon burn, wet-dry-vacuum mishap, and a paper cut across his entire torso that requires 73 stitches. The contract is almost certainly insured.

It's for too much, but consider what Jim Bowden is predicting for Rafael Soriano: Three years, $40.5 million. There's overpaying for a reliever, and then there's the Full Mando. This is not the latter. When you get upset at the money, think about Affeldt in a Dodgers uniform. That'll cure you right up.

This probably has an effect on what the Giants are going to do with Brian Wilson, but that's a point to flesh out in its own article. For now, Jeremy Affeldt's back, and unless it prevents the Giants from getting a second baseman and a center fielder, that's probably a good thing.

* Warning: May contain Delmon Young. It's okay now to laugh at Delmon Young hitting fifth, right? Man, that was some 2009 Giants **** right there. Couldn't say it at the time, though.)