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Everybody who disagrees with you is wrong and a bad person

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 For a while, I was getting worried. Predictions were shooting out of every internet crevice like tribbles, and all of them favored the Giants to win the National League West. National baseball writers were picking the Giants, every single writer for the Milwaukee-Wisconsin Jounal-Sentinel was picking the Giants, and even some guy with a Denver real estate blog was picking the Giants. The consensus was terrifying.

Slowly, though, picking the Rockies became a little more fashionable. Phew. There’s nothing more uncomfortable than being an overdog. Last year, the Giants weren’t a fashionable choice to win anything, and that worked out just fine. Let’s organize the people who aren’t picking the Giants into a few different categories:

Rockie Partisans

example: Purple Row

Expecting anything less would be silly. It’s possible that the Rockies are a better team than the Giants -- it’s certainly very, very close -- so you’d want a Rockies-themed site to be a bunch of weenies and go with the safe pick? Nonsense. Purple Row should pick the Rockies, as should every Rockies fan. That’s what March and April is for. Picking anything else would be way too cynical, which used to be our specialty. Used to be. Now we’re all wicked arrogant and obnoxious.


example: Aaron Boone, John Kruk, Mark Mulder, Rick Sutcliffe

There’s probably a reason why a good portion of the ex-players ESPN employ are going against the Giants. They’re probably thinking about the extra month of pitching affecting the young Giants staff, or perhaps they personally experienced an emotional letdown following an extended playoff run. Could be. I’d like to think, though, that they’re simply adding Ty Wigginton’s RBI total onto the Rockies’ runs scored total from last year and making one of those comically exaggerated whistling sounds. It’s the elitist in me.

Intelligent, stat-saavy types

example: Dave Cameron

It’s tempting to read too much into this category. As in, maybe this is filled with people who are so disgusted with the process that Brian Sabean uses to build his team, they can’t in good conscience pick the Giants to win. Call it guillenophobia. Maybe neifitis if you’re old school. But I’m hardly objective, and even I can see how the Rockies have a pretty good team. Just because someone doesn’t pick the Giants doesn’t mean that they’re doing it out of spite, hatred for your team, or because they aren’t trying to be objective.

Some guy who picked the Diamondbacks to win last year and is only included so we can laugh at him

example: Some guy who picked the Diamondbacks to win last year and is only included so we can laugh at him

He picked the Rockies this year too. We can only hope for 97 losses for the the Rockies this season. I should note that this guy is included only so we could laugh at him for picking the Diamondbacks to win last year.

Irresponsible, bad people

example: Joe Sheehan

Joe. Oh, Joe. Pick the Dodgers if you must, but don’t pick a Matt Kemp/Clayton Kershaw awards sweep along with it. What, you thought Rubby De La Rosa wasn’t eligible for Rookie of the Year? Also of note: Rubby De La Rosa is not a made up prospect.

Here’s the point, though: People can pick teams other than the Giants without being dolts. They don’t hate your team. They aren’t conspiring with the Freemasons and the BBWAA to ruin your enjoyment of sports. Stop being so offended. If you read predictions that aren’t giving the Giants the respect you feel is warranted, close your eyes and PICTURE NELSON CRUZ SWINGING THROUGH A BRIAN WILSON SLIDER AS YOUR FAVORITE TEAM WON THE WORLD SERIES, YOU TWIT.

That is all.

Alright, maybe Joe Sheehan hates your team, but that’s it. I mean, Matt Kemp?