The White Sox hired Robin Ventura as their manager yesterday. It's okay, though! He's totally coached high school and everything!
Friend of Ventura's says Ventura was assisting the Arroyo Grande (Ca.) HS baseball team past couple years, has "Stunning feel for game."
You know what else you can get a stunning feel for when you hang around high school kids for a couple of years? You can get a stunning feel for how to text while staring straight ahead in class, or how to make a pipe out of an apple for the marijuana drugs. But, sure, your baseball knowledge can grow into something special there too.
But, heck, maybe it'll work out. Maybe he has the perfect skills set to be a manager for the White Sox.
It also got me thinking: what ex-Giant could a) come out of nowhere, b) be named the manager, and c) would fill you with warm fuzzies? Sure there's a huge, scary case of the unknowns with Ventura, but there's a small part of every White Sox fan that's a little okay with the idea.
Will Clark? Eh, I still have an indelible image of him as a yappy rookie -- the kind of kid who'd empty both six-shooters into the ceiling of the saloon just because he could. He grew out of that, of course, and became a fine elder statesman, but I'd always wonder if the wild side would show up as a manager.
Barry Bonds? Hahahahahahaha. The only way I'd watch a second of VH1 would be to watch that reality show.
"Skip, I wanted to talk to you about my playing time."
"You heard me."
Bob Brenly? Well, before he was tainted with all that Arizona, sure. He's a better broadcaster than a manager, though.
A wild-card fringe player, like Darren Lewis, Mike Aldrete, or Kirt Manwaring? Maybe if they'd been coaching or managing, but not out of the blue. If Steve Decker, for example, were named the Giants' manager tomorrow, it would make sense. But to pull a name from the past, it would have to be a name.
In the end, the only comp I can come up with is Robby Thompson. Even then, he's the Ron Wotus of the Mariners, so it wouldn't be as completely out of nowhere as Ventura.
Is there anyone I'm missing? Other than Buster Posey, of course.