Go here and bid up the following:
- Ten batting practice pitches off a Giants starting pitcher
- Private hitting instruction from Pablo Sandoval and Hensley Meulens
- A private meeting with Tim Lincecum (and some sweet Field Club tickets, too)
Note that someone even creepier than you is bidding up the Lincecum meeting, so it's your duty to protect him. Lincecum, that is, not the creepy guy. The creepy guy is protected by the lock of Lincecum's hair that he paid a clubhouse attendant to get, so he doesn't need protecting.