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Why Tim Lincecum Should Win the Cy Young

He's better than everyone else.

What, you want more? Chris Carpenter missed a month and gave up six earned runs to the Giants, which is a sin so egregious he should be ineligible for next year's award as well. Adam Wainwright had more wins, but Lincecum's middle name is LeRoy, so those two equally important pieces of information cancel each other out.

Another reason that Lincecum should win is that he had to pitch every inning with the knowledge that if he gave up a run, he had to rely on a ragtag collection of non-hitting misfits to score two runs. If he gave up two runs, he had to rely on the same bunch of offensive null sets to score three runs. After giving up a bloop and a sacrifice bunt, he'd look at the runner at second and think, damn, if I give up another hit, that's one more run that our offense will have to score. I'd like to think that as he looked at the runner on second, Aaron Rowand waved at him. But that's just the poet in me. Point being, Lincecum pitched under more pressure because his offense stunk. Is that a valid reason? No, but it makes me feel better, and the abacus twiddlers agree that Lincecum was the most valuable pitcher in the NL, so I can always hide behind appeals to authority that I'm not sure I comprehend.

Maybe Lincecum winning another Cy Young will cost the Giants an extra two million clams. Maybe. But I've watched William VanLandingham tease us with potential. I've listened to the KNBR lines burn up after good games from Jamie Brewington, Allen Watson, and Ryan Vogelsong. I've watched hundreds of games featuring the close-but-no-cigar promise of Russ Ortiz and Shawn Estes. I've watched Joe Nathan build the bulk of an unlikely Hall of Fame case in a different uniform.

Tim Lincecum is it. He's the one we've been waiting for. He might have two Cy Youngs in each of his first two full seasons. He's it. I don't care if winning seven straight Cy Youngs costs the franchise eleventy billion dollars. I watched Noah Lowry disintegrate into a fine powder. My double-album of odes to Jerome Williams, Jesse Foppert, and Kurt Ainsworth seems kind of silly now. Merkin Valdez is still a freaking question mark, 27 years after the Giants acquired him. But we have Lincecum. That makes up for a whole hell of a lot.

So I support Tim Lincecum's candidacy for Cy Young. He makes America better. You like America, don't you? Also, every time a Giants fan roots against Lincecum in the hopes of a lower arbitration award, Tommy Lasorda's bosom tingles with mirth and delight. You have a choice. But you don't have a choice.