Games like last night’s remind us what Aprils are supposed to be. We’re supposed to charge into the beginning of the season thinking, hey, this team will probably stink, but OMG WE HAVE A CHANCE. Maybe Aaron Rowand has the exact same season! Maybe Randy Winn goes superflukecrazy again! Maybe Jose Castillo taps into to some reservoir of latent talent and has a breakout season! Maybe Ray Durham does something that resembles anything! Anything can happen! Dustiny! Bochiny! You’re gonna like these kids!
That’s how it’s supposed to be. We’re hopeful in April, and then we’re violently flagellated into reality one game at a time. That’s how it worked the last couple of seasons. The pattern of abuse is reassuring. This giving up in February stuff is all new to me, so forgive me for getting excited after last night’s win. Hell, I even made my apathy a badge of pride less than a week ago. One walk-off home run can’t change that, so I suppose it’s time for a binding contract:
How I Intend To Make It through the 2008 Giants Season with My Sanity:
- Under the Emotionally Disingenuous Acts Act of 2008, I reserve the right to be apathetic about losses, but I also reserve the right to get excited about meaningless wins.
- Any promise shown by a young player is due to emerging talent, not sample-size chicanery.
- Any struggles by an old player are due to age-related suckery, not sample-size chicanery.
- Two parts bourbon, one part sweet vermouth, a dash of bitters, and a maraschino cherry – all stirred with the stick of gum from a pack of 1989 Topps.
Just four to start, but the floor is open to amendments. What ignorance-is-bliss policies should be added to this bill of rights?