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I was going to do my weekly mid-winter link dump - you know, the kind of post where I link to stuff like a hometown profile of Aaron Rowand or plug a celebration of San Jose State's upcoming baseball season - but I was stopped by gale force stupidity. Apparently the team-specific MLB chats are where stupid questions breed like tribbles. From a recent White Sox chat:

What do you think about this: Joe Crede to the San Francisco Giants for Matt Cain and Jonathan Sanchez?

-- Rob, Wheaton, Ill.

Now, I was thinking a long time about what the proper response to this would be. And, I'm sorry, but the correct answer is that the beat writer should have realized this question contributes as much to as would a Hellen Keller joke. Sure, Rob asked the question, but he doesn't deserve all of the blame. I picture Rob typing the e-mail, putting a postage stamp in the disk drive, and getting tangled up in his monitor cord before he can click "send." He's probably still tangled up. He's suffered enough. No, it's the beat writer's fault. In a just world, his punishment would be that he'd live the rest of his life with a last name that means "pubic wig."

This burgeoning internet meme of e-mailing official team sites to see how they can turn their steaming crap into Matt Cain is driving me nuts. I knew the franchise was on hard times, but this makes me realize that the franchise is a league-wide joke. Without Barry Bonds, the Giants are now just a waste of young pitching. Other fans see that, and are mentally helping themselves to what little talent we have in an are-you-gonna-eat-that?-spirit.

So, screw you, baseball world. This is a terrible team, but we have something to watch, and you can't have any of it. This isn't the 2002 Devil Rays, where Randy Winn is the best hitt...wait, maybe it is. But instead of Tanyon Sturtze and Ryan Rupe, we have two of the best young pitchers in the game, and that means the world to us. You can't underestimate how much we're looking forward to watching Matt Cain and Tim Lincecum. So go pick over another carcass, you jackals.

Open Venting Thread. Vent about anything, Giants-related or otherwise. DRM, traffic jams, Canadians...anything. I'm all fired up now. Thanks, Rob.