Something about Benitez's career stats. Almost clever expression of disappointment regarding Benitez's performance so far. Hackneyed joke about his weight. Link to trade rumors involving the Marlins. Link to diary discussing trade rumors. Link to Red Sox denying trade rumors.
Put question about potential replacements here. Ask rhetorical question about their preparedness if they're ready to close. List replacements in order of preference:
- Kevin Correia
- Brian Wilson
- Jonathan Sanchez
- Vinnie Chulk
- Billy Sadler
- Put a really bad ex-Giant here. It's funny because it isn't a realistic solution.
Close by asking if it really worth it to trade Armando and pay his salary just to be rid of him. This is the fifteenth time the question has been brought up, so present it in a different way. Ask readers if they have any bright ideas, or if they are really hoping for one of the above players to sneak into the job.
Make sure there are no traces of this template once the post goes up. Credibility could be damaged if the readers knew you were just doing another paint-by-numbers post. Do not accidentally copy-and-paste the wrong text. Hopefully, the dude will get traded or the rumors stop soon.