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I was trying to do an updated mock roster, but it had too many stupid ideas that I'd have to explain. I'll have to break the stupid ideas up in chunks. For now, I'll just give a stupid idea sample. I'll also include a coupon with the sample for 20% off my next stupid idea:

Akinori Iwamura and Ben Zobrist for Fred Lewis and Brad Hennessey.

Iwamura didn't hit for power at all, but he got on base at a good clip, and he definitely showed a lot more power in Japan. He's a lefty, so that power probably wouldn't show up as home run power in Mays Field, but we could hope for doubles power to go along with the on-base skillz.

Zobrist, 27, is a slick-fielding shortstop with a career .316/.427/.453 minor league line, but he fell off the depth charts because of 97 awful ML at-bats last year. He's never had an OBP below .400 in the minors, he can back up Vizquel this year, he would give depth at one of the organization's barren positions, and he could be in the mix for a 2009 job. He's my most affordable white whale; if he could hit .280/.360/.390 in the majors, he'd be a really nice player to have on a rebuilding team.

The Rays are looking for another outfielder after the Delmon Young trade, though they probably don't want to give up a lot of chips for proven folks like Jason Bay and Josh Hamilton.

The Giants would fill a lineup spot without giving up a starting pitcher, which would allow them to fill more holes with Sanchez/Lowry.

Flame away.