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The slowest of news days....

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The Yankees are looking to do a sign-and-trade with Gary Sheffield, according to this NY Post article. There's no word on whether the team would want an expiring contract back, or maybe a lottery-protected first rounder. I'm going to chalk that unfortunate headline up to a tired editor.

The gist of the article, though, is that the Yankees would pick up Sheffield's $13M option after the season, hoping to get any sort of return at all. Maybe a team would prefer to have Sheffield for one year at $13M rather than two/$16M, or three/$19M, the idea goes. Maybe, but would there be a team willing to take on a 38-year-old outfielder coming off an injury? Does that sound like a situation a team would touch? Not bloody likely, as whatever team didn't thi...

Oh. Right. I type "38-year-old outfielder coming off an injury", and Brian Sabean feels a disturbance in the force. "As if a million hamstrings pulled at once." He, at the very least, has an RSS feed for this sort of thing.

Sure, past San Francisco rosters have subtly hinted at a preference for veterans, but now we're just extrapolating far too much from a tiny piece of information. Just because Sheffield might be on the market in a few months, doesn't mean the Giants would automatically be linked to him.

However, another AL executive said, "I believe someone would take him for a year, but the deal would have to be worked out ahead of time" and cited the Angels, White Sox and Giants as possible landing places.
Oh. Right. One unnamed suit does not a reality make, to be sure. The definition of executive could be a bit of an attempt to give the story credibility, but the actual definition could be stretched. It could be referring to a marketing exec, concessions manager, or Allard Baird. But the thought is out there now, floating around Sabean's consciousness. You can't put that toothpaste back in the tube.

Sheffield's defense at 39? Hrmm. Best case: Something like one of those races where you put your forehead on a bat knob, spin around in a circle thirty times, and then try and reach the finish line. Day in, day out, quality entertainment. Worst case scenario: Same as the above, but Sheffield stops hitting. Then the Giants wouldn't have a DH slot to stash him in, which is why a National League team makes absolutely zero sense.

The article also insinuates Sheffield might play first for some team in the future. Quick summation of that idea: Russ Davis with each hand covered with a foam "we're-#-1!" giant novelty finger, sprayed with liquid nitrogen like the T-1000 at the end of Terminator 2, and spoon-fed some Mr. Barnable's Indifference Tonic from 1904.

Sheffield might still be able to hit for another season -- hit extremely well, even -- but there are too many things going against this idea to make it plausible. At some point the halfway house for pseudo-retirees has to stop. Also, it's worth noting Sheffield and Bonds used to be quite chummy, passing the summer days by giggling and having liquid repugnance balloon fights. It's hard to believe that two people as understanding and mature as Sheffield and Bonds would have had a falling out, but that's what happened. With Bonds in the franchise picture, even as a retired casino greeter-type, a reunion would be very unrealistic.

As an idea, it was probably an offhand remark by someone who didn't really mean to be a source, and who didn't really think about qualifying the answers in his head before offering them up. Sabean would probably get a pretty good laugh at the article, in all fairness. As fodder for a column, though, it's gold. Gold! Besides, who wants to read another recap of a Giants loss?

Wait, really? They won? So, the Giants are playing at a .667 clip over their last three games? That means if the current pace holds, they'll go 33-17 over the final stretch, and end up with 87 wins. Even better, they're playing at a 1.000 pace over the last two games. I don't want to jinx anything, but I think 104 wins might be enough to win the division, so maybe that's the one to hope for.