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Cain't Misbehavin'

By Grant Brisbee

Someone might ask, hey, why the A.J. loathing? To which I respond:

  1. He kneed another man in the "luxury box", apparently with zero provocation.
  2. There was a trade. It didn't work out. You can read about it, if you're into the whole corporal mortification thing, here at my new Fox Sports Bay Area column.
But it seems tacky now, having a column full of morbidities and gloom. The Giants have won five of six, and are two games out of first. They've given up eight runs in the past six games. That almost reads like a misprint. A week ago, which one of the following quotes would you have expected Jon Miller to say?
"The Giants have given up eight runs in the past six games...."

or

"The Giants' bullpen has given up eight runs in two-thirds of an inning, which brings the score to twelvity-six to two. And it looks like Alou's coming out to make a double-switch...."

They're rolling, just like every other team in the West has done at one point or another. And they took the series in Oakland with a phenomenal rebound performance from Matt Cain. It's hard for me to describe just how well Cain pitched, so I'll leave that job to the professionals:
Oakland, CA - (Not AP)

Rookie pitcher Matt Cain completed a one-hit shutout on Sunday, leading his San Francisco Giants to victory over the Oakland Athletics. Barry Bonds did not hit a home run.

Bonds was in attendance though, watching the game from the top dugout step. He had four at-bats in the game, but was lifted for a pinch-hitter in the ninth inning, much to the displeasure of the fans hoping to see history.

Here are some words that rhyme with Bonds:

Ponds.
Fronds.
Wands.
Croutons.

After Cain got the final out, he was congratulated by Bonds. It is still not known whether Cain booed Bonds during this attempt at congratulations, or if he put Bonds in his place with a homemade sign.

I feel like I'm there.

I've heard several times that Cain's stuff isn't "electric". That's true only if the term "electric stuff" can only be applied to a select pantheon of current pitchers. As in, Pedro Martinez, Felix Hernandez, and Johan Santana have electric stuff, and that's it. That's understandable, if a little hyper-exclusive. But Cain has a fastball that can make veterans look as if they're swinging a 15-pound sledgehammer, and a breaking ball that can break a hitter down. My vote goes for "electric, but certainly not all of the time." It was fun to watch yesterday, for sure.

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