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Not an Open Gameday Thread

First off, a big, big thanks to Josh from Hollywood for filling in for me. He almost did a perfect job. The posts were great, but the begonias were dead. I said don't overwater them, Josh, not ignore them entirely. And did you have a girl over? Read the note I left next time.

The internet has obviously made it easier to have your voice heard. Heck, just without the ease of Blogger I might have given up. Twenty years ago, I was a guy with a beard passing out leaflets to scared pedestrians on a cool January morn. Far be it from me to dismiss the advances that have given me so much, but there is a weakness. This morning, I discovered the perfect metaphor for the Giants offense. But I couldn't share it. The technology wasn't there. Oh, the details can give you an idea -- something about being out in the wilderness, not taking a shower for four days, and a disturbing ability to peel grime from a human body as you would Saran Wrap from a Thanksgiving ham -- but without being there, man, the metaphor was useless. Hopefully, that technology will be there some special day.

Wearing my Giants hat around around Shasta Lake provided several people an excuse to start talking about baseball. Well, one person, to be exact. But there was excitement in his eyes as he asked, "Hey, you know Bonds is coming back today, don't you?" I did, as my idea of roughing it is to make sure at least one person in the party has something that can access the internet, else I spend the trip trying to make a device on my own out of pine cones and silt. I replied in the affirmative, and then went on to ask, "Hey, how about Matt Cain?" I hadn't seen the performance yet, and still haven't. I'm guessing he came onto the field like Apollo Creed from Rocky IV -- an entourage, pyrotechnics, and James Brown doing a Cain-themed song resembling "Livin' in America" -- and was carried off the field by a mad throng of fans too filled with glee to effectively riot. This may or may not have happened, but I knew enough to make conversation.

The Cain stuff didn't interest him nearly as much as Bonds coming back did. Although one of the highlights of the summer is going to be firing up the ol' TiVo and absorbing Cain's masterpiece, I can't blame the guy. Bonds is coming back. Barry Bonds. Yowza. It's probably too late to make some serious playoff noise, but just watching the man is going to be enough. This brief September showcase will allow the Giants to see if he is someone worth building the 2006 team around, or if they should alter their strategy to the controversial strategy of acquiring other good hitters. We'll see. It will be fun to watch, regardless. Did I write fun? I meant needed and long overdue.

Thanks again to Josh, who was a critical darling. We'll talk about what the numbers said later....