I've been actively avoiding the Larry Krueger fiasco because a) I didn't really have anything new to add, and b) I didn't really care. Here are the salient points as I see them:
- What Krueger said was stupid.
- Everything that followed was given way, way, way, way too much attention.
- "Braindead Caribbean Players Hacking at Slop Nightly", seems like code, or some mnemonic device. Like, if you needed to remember the letters BCPHSN for a test like the SAT, you'd drink Red Bull and mutter "Braindead Caribbean Players Hacking at Slop Nightly...Braindead Caribbean Players Hacking at Slop Nightly...." until the sun came up. It definitely has an "Every Good Boy Deserves Fudge" feel to it.
- The ol' saying of "You can't walk off the island" doesn't apply here. By "Caribbean", he meant Pedro Feliz. Maybe Deivi Cruz. The larger idea --that Pedro Feliz might be the least cerebral hitter Giants fans have ever had to watch, including people like Glenallen Hill and Alex Sanchez -- was lost in the aftermath. There was no reason to dig out the "walk off the island" stereotype in this case, because nationality didn't matter. Lance Niekro hacks at slop nightly. Mike Matheny hacks at slop nightly. Marquis Grissom did hack at slop nightly, and then gave his copy of "Hacking at Slop Nightly For Dummies" to Jason Ellison. That's a whole mess of non-Caribbean, and that's what makes the whole thing unbelievable. What a stupid thing to say. I wonder if Krueger regrets it.
- I can't imagine riding the buses through the southern states as a Dominican player in the `50s. It's doubtful any of us can. But Felipe Alou should accept an apology from someone sincerely offering one. Either that, or call him a messenger of Satan. I go back and forth on this one. "Accept apology" or "Call him messenger of Satan". Gee, they are both so rational and adult, I'm glad I didn't have to make that decision in real life.
- Live radio has to be a nightmare. I might have typed things more offensive than Krueger's idiocy fifty times over, but looked, said, whoa, that don't sound no good, and hit the backspace key. Krueger's comments broke the stupidograph, but he didn't call for ethnic cleansing. That's more of a KSFO thing.
- This column began by throwing the name of Osama Bin Laden and Adolf Hitler in the first paragraphs of a Krueger-related piece. Awesome. I was wondering what happened to writers after they left The Onion.
- None of this would have happened if there wasn't anyone listening to sports-talk radio. Which they shouldn't have been. Because it rots your brain.