Everyone thinks this is the day America won its independence. Phppt. Morons. What actually happened is the Mexican army defeated the French at the Battle of Puebla. The battle was sponsored by Corona, and it's why we watch fireworks. Or something.
After leaving town for days, the Giants lost twice. As being superstitious is a requirement for baseball fans, I am no longer allowed out of town. Other things I have done this year that were proven to have caused the Giants to lose:
Donned my Warriors hat on a Giants gameday.
As you can read, it's been a tough year to be a superstitious Giants fan. If you lose all the time, it's tough to point out if the cause stems from the wrong socks, or eating either lunch or dinner. I need a federal grant for this stuff.
Accidentally put on the Giants hat I wore during the last loss.
Ate either lunch or dinner.
Addressed someone by their first name.