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This is another case of you not needing me to put some sort of spin on last night's game. The Giants didn't just mess the kitchen floor, they're actively rolling in it now. They've dropped a home series against the Royals, and have to scrounge to avoid the sweep. This team is repugnant.

I have about, oh, 39 more paragraphs of that sort of stuff in me, but that is guaranteed to get tiresome. Instead, let's take a sip of the "players' coffee" in the clubhouse, escape reality, and look at what's going right with the team:

  1. The team does not actively condone the existence of automobile repair facilities specifically designed to harvest parts from stolen cars, also known as "chop shops".

We can all agree that's a good thing.


Uh... Lessee....


C'mon, now.... Wait, I have one!
  1. Moises Alou's at-bat last night was fun to watch. Alou has had his moments of spastic flailing in the field, but none have come in a game-defining situation. He has this weird combination of overzealous hackitude, patience, and ability to fight off tough pitches. He'll work a walk one inning after swinging at a first-pitch slider at his eyes. Partly truth and partly fiction, if I can quote Kristofferson again.
  2. Scott Munter looks like a major-league reliever, as his arsenal is unique enough to have helped ease his transition into the majors. I first started to become a rabid Giants fan in 1997, and my love for baseball helped me get over my dark college period of Blues Traveler/Screamin' Cheetah Wheelies concerts and hacky-sacks. In `97, Julian Tavarez was Dusty's go-to-guy, which meant he was going to pitch in every game decided by three or fewer runs. It must have been hard to concentrate with the steaming husk of Doug Henry lying limp in the corner of the clubhouse.

    Tavarez's job was to come in and get a groundball with a runner on first and less than two outs. He was a double play machine, at least for the early part of that season. Munter has that same sort of fuzz on his sinker, though he tends to leave it up more than Tavarez did. Munter is definitely one of the better stories of the pitching staff.

Your turn. Let's turn this into a self-help session. The glass isn't 4/5ths empty, it's 1/5th full! And filled with rancid Yoo-Hoo! Still, there have to be some positives to take away from this team....