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It's a funny thing, growing older. You start to see people cradling newborns, doting on them and showing them off, and you start to wonder what it feels like to hold something that precious, that magnificent. There is no way to imagine the overflowing joy, the sheer wonder.

Unless you catch your first foul ball. Which I did today. That was the zenith of my life. Sorry about that, unborn child. Or, as I've already nicknamed you, "Non-Ball".

After hundreds of games, not having caught a ball was something of an insult. I didn't even have any war stories or close calls. Now, I have my white whale, and I even got talked up by Mike Krukow. Quoth the Kruk:

A guy in the lower section made a catch, and I don't know how he did it. Because he was looking at his feet when the ball went in his glove. But it went right into that big ol' chunk of leather. Atta babe.
Now, being called "babe" by Mike Krukow is reward enough, but I have a couple of points to make.
  1. I wasn't looking at my feet to avoid getting hit in the face with a baseball, dropping to the ground, and writhing in a puddle of my own blood. I was looking down because of the style points involved.
  2. Actually, number one pretty much covers it, and is not a lie in any way.
  3. Okay, so I was being a weenie. But if I were killed, who would have looked after the ball?
Now, after the close up of my ugly mug, there was a silence. Krukow has seen a lot of baseball games, but he just couldn't believe the unadulterated display of pure athleticism he had just seen. Then, still dumbfounded, says:
Sometimes the best plays of the game are made in the stands.
And that's the story of my first foul ball. Also, the Giants lost in a humiliating fashion, taking our hearts and running them through a citrus juicer. Again. Eight runs in a game Jason Schmidt starts, and they still lose to a lineup with Ryan Church, Jamey Carroll, Endy Chavez, Brian Schneider and Cristian Guzman.

Oof. It'd be just dandy for Bonds to come back, but I hope he brings Schmidt with him when he shows.