So. It’s like this. Saturday evening, I’m blowing up balloons for my playoff decorations, and I realize that the black balloons I bought are not black at all but purple. I can’t blame the party store, as it says purple right on the package, and it’s not like I am unfamiliar with the concept of uninflated balloons appearing black but revealing themselves to be purple or dark blue when filled with air. Still, there I am with purple balloons, which are obviously no use at all. So I figure that it’s getting close to game time and I really don’t want to go out again (I live in Connecticut, so the game starts late; the children are in bed already at this point), and after all I have black streamers and orange streamers and orange balloons, and it’s pretty festive. So that’s all right, I think to myself, and settle down. And the Giants lose. So. Obviously, the next day I go out and purchase some black balloons and inflate them and add them to the decorations. I mean. There’s no point in taking chances, right? So before game time Sunday night, I have black and orange balloons, and black and orange streamers, and also, just in case, some Oreos with orange filling, which are frankly pretty nasty, but hey, it’s the playoffs. Only the Giants get crushed. So. The question is: how do I prepare for Game Three on Wednesday? My instinct is to put up more balloons and streamers, but they have not been working so far. I am in Connecticut, so the option of breaking the string by watching in a bar is not really on, and besides Game Three starts while the kids are up and can watch a little live baseball (I have forced them to watch the condensed games the morning after, because being a baseball fan is about strength of character) in the house with the decorations—if the decorations are not bad luck. Should I take them down altogether? Put up red balloons, hoping for the bad luck to fall on the other team? Fortunately, I have a travel day to explore my options.
This occurred during a recent series in Colorado. During the national anthem, this made me crack up.