he probably ate her lunch

I think her eyes are burning from seeing Lasorda stuffed into those uniform pants.

Some things should be banned.

Where's E?  This really calls for an E take.

he probably thought she was the Phillie Phanatic.

Just as El Rotundo rolls up in his Leisure World Land Rover. Not pictured were Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, and Nicole Richie, all claiming to be the girl's mother. It turns out Lasorda was actually not signing autographs, but rather sworn affidavits claiming to be the father of Anna Nicole Smith's baby.

This brings the current number of men claiming to be the father to an even 483--including Smith's recently deceased oldest son, Daniel, and Ted Williams' cryogenically preserved head. This according to Howard K. Stern. Stern, who happens to be one of the 483 claimants, also represents the estate of Daniel Smith, the deceased's deceased son. When asked if this constituted a conflict of interest with his own claim, Stern referred all questions to his personal representive, Bud Selig, who indicated that your reporter would have to purchase a subscription to Dish Network to ascertain the correct response at an appropriate time, to be determined in the near future by a special commission to be appointed by him, whose members would be announced shortly thereafter, but not too late, and not too soon, but at just the right time, in the right place, for the results to have maximum impact without having a negative effect on the eventual outcome of the commission's initial findings, which undoubtedly shall preceed the issuance of an actual written report, the release of which, shall be made public at a press conference to be held at the office of the Commissioner of Major League Baseball in New York City in the state of New York, which as everyone knows is the third most populated state in the Union (including Hawaii and Alaska even), and as such, presents a strong and compelling argument for presenting this momentus document with great historical overtones in this prestigous locale to be televised and broadcast round the world on Major League Baseball's very own station as carried by Dish Network, which in the interest of full disclosure, the commissioner is a substantial stockholder, but nevertheless, is adament in his claim that he would never, ever, under any circumstances, backdate any stock certificates for preferred debentures. And Dentures neither.

What was that Slim Fast routine again? Oh yes...a shake for breakfast, a shake for lunch, and a small child for dinner.

Looks like Mark David Chapman standing there towards the back.

You've been saying that lasorda makes little kids cry for a long time, but this is actual proof.  Well played, Madame.

Perfahps the charatcter Fletch, played by Chevy Chase,
embodies the notion best:

(Punches Glass): "I hate Tommy Lasorda."

http://i2.ebayimg.com/03/i/03/36/de/b0_1_b.JPG