Happy Bastille Day! I feel comfortable saying that because it's the summer and there are no major league baseball games, so we might as well all be French commies.
Seriously? Two Grand Slams in 1 Year?
Brandon Belt may have been out of the lineup yesterday, but he'll never leave our hearts. When he took to the keyboard yesterday, he was miffed that he's only hit two grand slams in his life, and Madison Bumgarner has hit two just this year. I know how he feels. I want to be as good at blowing snotrockets as Bumgarner, but the only feedback I ever get is "Good God" and "Don't ever do that."
Rockies Owner: ‘Maybe Denver Doesn’t Deserve A Franchise’
It's always fun when the ultra-rich remind the rest of us we're just a bunch of whining moochers who don't deserve the gifts that they have bestowed upon us. In this case, it's Rockies owner Dick Monfort who read a petulant email from a fan complaining about his decisions and responded by massively out-petulanting him. It's like they say, any PR is good PR!*
He's right that Denver doesn't deserve that franchise, though. They employ Dinger. No one deserves that.
*Not a Purple Row joke
Red Sox have no room for Torres
About a month ago, Andres Torres signed a minor league contract with Boston. Since then, he's been pretty good for their AAA team in Pawtucket, but since the Red Sox are only interested in playing young guys who can help them in the future, Andres doesn't have much of a chance for a call-up to the majors. This is an outrage. He should file a class-action age-discrimination lawsuit
Q&A - Bud Selig to leave baseball with fond memories
Are you looking for a fawning Q&A with Bud Selig about all the great things that he's done? Would you like for him to make statements that go wholly unchallenged? If so, do I have an article for you! I mean, I know that a lot of good things have happened for baseball while he's been commissioner, but to ignore the ridiculous blue-ribbon panel situation for the A's new stadium or . . . you know, this doesn't matter that much to me. Bud Selig is a dick, and he's arrogant, and he's power-hungry but desperate to appear humble, and I just can't care. I only have so much righteous indignation, and I need to save it for the next guy or Roger Goodell, either of whom will be a fine, fine target.
Weirdest injuries of the season
Matt Cain wins a prize! Unfortunately, if you read the title of the article, you have a pretty good idea what the prize is. Still, it's nice for the Giants to get some recognition for their impressive accomplishments in the first half. If you told me before the season that Jayson Stark would have a midseason awards post, and Giants would take up 40% of it, I'd have been happy with that. I see no reason to change this opinion just because I know the context.
Derek Jeter: part owner of a company that sells high-tech men’s underwear that refrigerates your genitals
1313 linked this in the comments on Friday, but you know what? It is Important, so let's take another look.