San Francisco Giants Link Dump, 6/5

Wait, this isn't Peter Weller? NOT MY ROBOCOP. - Rick Osentoski-USA TODAY Sports

I find a dump's opinion of me is very much influenced by whether or not I have links

I love Mitch Hedberg, but if I'd known Tuesday was RoboCop Day, this week's quotes would have been all "Dump or alink, you're coming with me" and "Excuse me, I have to dump. Somewhere, there is a link happening."

Scouting RoboCop's first pitch on RoboCop Day
RoboCop Day is the best of all days. Sure, his statue wasn't unveiled like we all thought it would be, but he made the first pitch interesting in a way that just about no one else could. If you were in the stands, and RoboCop was throwing out the first pitch, wouldn't you actually pay attention instead of grumbling about some guy from Bank of America? Because it's ALWAYS some guy from Bank of America when I go. is it so much to ask that I get just one cyborg killing machine?

Star-divide

Sinkers, Change-ups and Platoon Splits
It turns out that right-handed change-ups are much better pitches against lefties than two-seamers, despite very similar movement. Why? Well, if your first guess is the difference in speed, then...yeah. That's it. But Fangraphs was clever enough to get a whole article out of that, so congratulations to them.

Star-divide

Pence: Wild they brought the scooter back
When someone stole Hunter Pence's scooter, my first thought was "I thought San Francisco was cooler than that," even though I absolutely did not think that. People's bikes get stolen all the time, and this isn't really different enough for me to be surprised. Still, I'm happy he got it back, and not just because I didn't want his people laying waste to SoMa in revenge.

Star-divide

Driverless cars and Red Barchettas: Did Rush predict a Google-controlled future?
I hear that one or two commenters on this site has an opinion on Rush. I want to maintain my neutrality in order to better maintain my appeal across all demographics, so I won't weigh in on whether Rush is pretty good, or a horrific nightmare whose music is wholly devoid of redeeming qualities. Likewise, I won't tell you if I think their lyrics are okay, or if they are full of asinine Randian pseudo-philosophy that has no place in a civilized society.

However, I WILL say that I listened to six minutes of Rush for you people, and I want some damn gratitude.

Star-divide

Did the Pittsburgh Pirates Penny-Pinch Their Way Back Into Irrelevance?
It was fun to bandwagon the Pirates last year, so now that they're under .500 again, I guess I should feel bad, but I don't. They're back to not mattering to me at all. You might think that their success last year would have bought them some measure of sympathy, but that's not the way I'm looking at it. I see last year's Pirates team more as a Frisbee you find on a deserted beach. Hey, free Frisbee! And then when you throw it into the ocean by accident, you're not mad the Frisbee is gone. You're just happy you could play with it for a while.

Star-divide

Snack Metal
Album covers, every one.

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