Every once in a while, it's good to have a soporific whimper of a game, just to remind us of how good we have it when the Giants are playing well.
No? That doesn't make sense? Yeah, I know, but all the most highly paid sportswriters have HOT TAKES and those skills take years to develop. Gotta start somewhere!
Giants' Kuiper, Krukow might be MLB's best broadcast team
This article is an extremely positive review of Monday's Giants telecast, and a good read. So if you're looking for a detailed breakdown of what Kruk and Kuip do so well, and what the difference is between their style and the way most broadcast teams function, this is a good read. It's also much more effusive about the Cookie Monster interview than Twitter was, so if you're one of those people who thinks Amy G is terrible, you should probably start complaining now about people not complaining about her. Your opinion must be heard!
Lucas Duda also claims to have been given food poisoning from Shake Shack at Citi Field
I cannot imagine a Metsier story than this. First Ryne Sandberg got food poisoning. Now, it's Lucas Duda, an actual Met, getting sick from food served at the Mets' stadium. My spellcheck says that Metsian isn't a word, but there is literally no other way to describe this. Also not words: Metsy, Metstacular, Metsing, Metsorrhea, and Apocamets. Sometimes the English language is just so inadequate.
The Biogenesis Sudoku game
A primer on the biggest people involved in Biogenesis and all the shadiness involved in every aspect of MLB's investigation, including the recent revelations that the most damning evidence they have was probably stolen. But remember kids, the real crime is using drugs to make yourself better at sports!
PED-related scrutiny follows Melky Cabrera
The most exciting part of Melky doing well is speculating about what kind of contract he's going to get next year. Maybe that's not the case for Blue Jays fans, but they're Canadian, so they can be safely disregarded. But will Melky get the kind of contract the Giants almost offered him in 2012? Or is he permanently tainted by Biogenesis or his fake website or his wild inconsistency from year to year or the way he didn't address his teammates in 2012 after being suspended or
Okay, I can see an argument for his salary being low.
Top 20 Jose Fernandez Pitches of 2014
Because you're not sad enough about Jose Fernandez being out for the year and almost certainly having Tommy John surgery, here are 20 GIFs of his best pitches this year. My favorite is the one where Yasiel Puig looks like he's trying to swat Tinkerbell with a flagpole.
If Game of Thrones Were Set In Super Mario World
I don't know if anyone on this site likes Game of Thrones or video games, but on the off chance you do, this might be a fun video that you will enjoy.