I remember the bad ol' days, when September call-ups were the most exciting part of the season. Saaaay, this Eugenio cat might be the second baseman of the future. A 1.021 OPS and four stolen bases? Better keep an eye on this guy!
I also remember the bad ol' days when the Giants had a September call-up who was actually a good option for a punchless team still in a playoff race, but who never played. Stare at Buster Posey's game log for a while. Remember that he was called up on Sept. 2 that year. Stare at the game logs again. Amazing.
Yet I also remember the bestest September call-up of all:
Aw, Ubaldo. Why the long face?
Yes, it's time for September call-ups, which might not mean anything, unless it means everything. First, the healthy pitchers on the 40-man roster who aren't on the 25-man:
Correa lost most of his season to injury, and he threw only 18 (bad) innings in San Jose this year, so he's out. The other four? Sure. Runzler has a 6.57 ERA in 27 appearances in Fresno, but the more arms the better. You never know when you'll be in one o' them 20-inning games. If Javier Lopez allowed a homer to Jason Castro last night, for example, the Giants could have gone to extra innings with only Sergio Romo in the bullpen. That would have been awful. Bring up all the pitchers, and use the iffy ones when you're up or down by 10. I'm thinking Runzler might be left behind, though.
The healthy hitters:
Adrianza isn't coming up. The other two probably are. Gillaspie throws like Johnny Damon wearing boxing gloves, but he's a good left-handed bat off the bench.
Now we get to the fun part: the players not on the 40-man roster. The Giants have a full 40 on the roster right now, but Freddy Sanchez isn't on the 60-day DL, which would make room for one more spot. Or, maybe he could come back, WWF-style, with smoke and pyrotechnics like Big John Studd, or something. But it's more likely they'll just take the roster spot back. Which leaves the following possibilities, starting with the pitching:
He has a strikeout-to-walk ratio of almost four in Fresno. I'd rather see him in the Guillermo Mota role than Guillermo Mota.
The Giants don't need to protect him from the Rule 5 draft just yet -- he wrote, waiting to be corrected in the comments -- but he's had a sweet year in the Eastern League (2.12 ERA, 130 strikeouts, 38 walks, 143 innings), and he can get ground balls. I'd rather see him in the Guillermo Mota role than Guillermo Mota. This is a common theme. (And I don't dislike Mota that much, to be honest.)
Don't know much about him, other than Bochy mentioned his name specifically when asked about call-ups. He's another sinkerballer.
Scott Munter is in Fresno, and he should get called up because that would be hilarious. Somewhere along the way, he figured out how to strike people out a little. How? I want to see! Kind of.
He's had arm issues and an inconsistent year. I'd pass on him this season.
Same thing as Hembree, but without the inconsistent year. He's been awesome. Next year's a better bet, though, considering the arm issues.
And the hitting …
I could have seen them doing it if he maintained his hot stretch, but he wasn't that good in August. He'd be the Darren Ford of 2012, which is tempting, but he'd also hit like the Darren Ford of 2012. Tempting, but the Giants will probably pass.
My choice. He's a switch-hitter who can play three positions (albeit poorly), and he has a career OBP of .410. He has Burrissian power -- both players have four minor-league homers in their careers -- but he can also hit for average. As a guy who doesn't have any notable platoon splits, he'd be a better pinch-hitting option than what the Giants are currently featuring.
Aw, man, this is going to be what happens, isn't it?
Wait, no, this is what's going to happen. Nady so far in Fresno: .267/.337/.535 with six dingers. Yep. He's coming up. I hate that I figured this out at the end. Sorry about all the words up there. (And, really, I don't have problem with a lefty-tickler like him on an expanded roster.)
Just because I want this to happen:
Kuiper: Two outs, bottom of the ninth. Giants 10, Dodgers 0. Munter trying to finish it for Vogelsong and wrap up the division. He sets … and he throws to Adrian Gonzalez … and it's popped up! Linden is under it, and he makes the catch! The Giants are the NL West champions, and … wait, now there's a naked man running around on the field. He has something painted on his body … "I'm from 2009 and on acid and what is this?" … I don't quite understand that, but the Giants are the champions of the NL West!
A fella can dream. And, heck, Linden actually fits the current roster pretty well.
Long post short: I'm guessing the call-ups are Otero, Hacker, Edlefsen, Pill, Gillaspie, and Nady. Which is amazingly unexciting. But I tried to warn you up there.