Giants nab Scott Shuman in minor-league Rule 5

In the minor-league portion of the Rule 5 Draft, the Giants selected Scott Shuman, a 24-year-old reliever, from the Tampa Bay Rays. Who will probably never make the majors.

This is an aside to remind you that Eugenio Velez is one of the most successful minor-league Rule 5 picks in the history of the Rule 5 Draft. This is not hyperbole, not a joke. When it comes to playing time in the majors, Velez is one of the best players to ever get drafted in the minor-league portion of the Rule 5 draft.

So there are long odds. BUT CHECK THIS GUY OUT:

Amazing. Hilarious. The good news is the Giants don't have to keep him on the roster all year like the major-league Rule 5 draftees. Wait, that's the bad news. C'mon, we've already won two championships -- don't you just want to be entertained? This guy would qualify.

But this is an interesting pick. John Manuel is impressed.

Most intriguing pick in minor phase: RHP Scott Shuman to the #Giants. Guy throws 95-97 or more. Dick Tidrow gets #ninja hands on power arm

— John Manuel (@johnmanuelba) December 6, 2012

/throws shuriken to backstop

Hey, if Jeff Nelson can make it, so can my man Shuman.

The Giants didn't lose Brock Bond in the draft, which gives you an idea of what the rest of the baseball world thinks about him, too. In the minor-league portion, the Giants lost Cameron Lamb, a 23-year-old pitcher who hasn't pitched above Salem-Keizer. He's from Australia, where they don't have a lot of organized ball/running water, so he's probably a little raw.

Still, look at those strikeouts! Those walks! Scott Shuman, color me fascinated!

The Giants run into the glass budget again

Should they spend more this offseason?

So it's come to this: the remaining need for the Giants

Guh.

Tuesday scuttlebutt update

Scuttlebupdate? Yes, that will do.

It's been a busy day in Nashville, though there hasn't been a ton to report on the Giants' side, possibly because Brian Sabean isn't even at the Winter Meetings. There are a few rumors and tidbits to note, though.

Rumor: Giants are considering/offering/have offered/have considered three-year deal to Marco Scutaro for much moneys.

Relevant tweets:

Bidding on Marco Scutaro said to have reached something in the range of 3 years, $24 million; SF viewed as frontrunner by source involved.

— Buster Olney (@Buster_ESPN) December 4, 2012

Must've gotten wires crossed on Scutaro. I am hearing definitively now that 2 years plus vesting option is what the #SFGiants last offered.

— Andrew Baggarly (@CSNBaggs) December 4, 2012

IN-YOUR-FACE ANALYSIS: We talked about this all morning. Scary! Three years for Marco Scutaro is scary! The name Omar Vizquel was brought up as a precedent, and that's a good point. The Giants really did give Vizquel a three-year deal, and they gave it to him after he failed a physical for the Mariners. And in the last year of the deal, Vizquel was mostly useless.

But for the first two years, he was quite good. So that's the thing with Scutaro: Do you take the hit in three years because he's such a nice fit for the coming season? Think of it like a one year, $23 million deal (with two team options at the league minimum) for a team that's out of options. It only seems half-horrific then.

Eh. As long as they have a good team next year, I'll worry about 2015 when it comes up. That's all the way over there. Even though that mindset is why it took me 15 years to graduate college, I'm sticking with it.

Rumor:
Nick Swisher likes the Giants!

Relevant tweet:

nick swisher will wait for hamilton deal, said @scottmcbs. word is, he'd like to go to the #SFGiants. #redsox also in play

— Jon Heyman (@JonHeymanCBS) December 4, 2012

HARD-HITTING ANALYSIS:
You know what? I'm going to go full broken-record on this offseason. I don't care about 2015. Don't care don't care don't care. Do you know how much can change in three seasons? Here's Joe Posnanski's top-100 player list from 2009. Josh Beckett, Justin Morneau, Mark Teixeira, and Manny Ramirez are all in the top 25. So is Tim Lincecum, Dan Haren, and Johan Santana.

We don't know if Madison Bumgarner, Matt Cain, and Buster Posey are still going to be franchise pillars in three years. We have a pretty danged good idea that they will be next year.

So bring on Swisher! Does he want the Victorino contract? Take it! Fill the outfield. Make Gregor Blanco a fantastic fourth outfielder instead of a stopgap left fielder. Don't care. Make more panda hats. Hell, give Swisher an animal nickname. The Marmot. There, done. Make a bunch of marmot hats.

Sign the Marmot. Go for it. I'M TRIPPING BALLS ON WINTER MEETINGS DUST. GIVE ME THE NUMBER FOR JOSH HAMILTON'S AGENT. NO, WAIT, ZACK GREINKE. I'LL CALL FROM THE TUB BECAUSE I NEED TO COOL OFF FOR A BIT.

Rumor:
The Giants exercised the 2014 options on Bruce Bochy and Brian Sabean.

Relevant tweet:
You don't need one, dammit. And it's not a rumor.

FAN PERSPECTIVE AND ANALYSIS:
Both of these guys are going to be Giants until they decide they don't want to be. This is the least-surprising news of the offseason, but imagine knowing it at the end of 2008. You would have set fire to the future. Instead, it makes perfect sense now. What a country! What an interesting time we live in!

Rumor:
Shane Victorino is signing with the Red Sox

Relevant tweet:

Dear #SFGiants front office, we fans all hate Shane Victorino, since forever. Do not give him money to wear orange and black. #VictoriNO

— Sean Gothman (@SeanGothman) December 1, 2012

FACTS-BASED OPINIONS:
It was cold. Of course it was. It was Boston in the winter. Victorino got off the plane and adjusted the ass-scarf he had wrapped around his ass-neck, which is what separated his ass-face from his ass-shoulders.

Victorino started to smell the air. His lips curled back and over his teeth.

"Snnffsplllpphhh ... I'm close. I can smell him. Shnnrrrffffflllfff."

He took out a picture of Cody Ross from his ass-jacket. Studied it for a bit.

"You can't run forever, Cody. I will catch up with you one day. Yes, soon. Soon, I will."

Then an angel came down from heaven and ripped Victorino's sternum out. Cody Ross's plane out of Boston was not delayed. Victorino did not die, but that is because he can't. It just hurt a lot, and everyone in heaven laughed at his pain.

Winter Meetings preview