The Giants and the Monkey Paw
by Grant Brisbee on Aug 17, 2011 12:23 PM PDT
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Obvious? Maybe. But that hasn't stopped me before!
The Giants' clubhouse before a game. Players and coaches are getting ready, laughing, talking. Manager Bruce Bochy comes in with a box.Sergio Romo: What's that, skip?
Bruce Bochy: It's a package. Think it was supposed to go to my neighbor. I'm always getting his mail.
Romo opens the box. Bochy mumbles something and wanders off.
Romo: Whoa. Dude. It's a gnarled old monkey paw.
Jeremy Affeldt: No way.
Matt Cain: Careful with that.
Romo: No, man, you're supposed to make wishes on that thing. I totally saw that on a show once.
Cain: Yeah, but the wishes end up all twisted and freaky. It's from the "Twilight Zone."
Aaron Rowand: Screw that. I'm a wish something.
Rowand closes his eyes
Rowand: I want people to notice me when I'm hitting. I want them to stop whatever they're doing, elbow their friends, and say, "Hey. Aaron Rowand is up. Check this out."
One of the monkey paw fingers curls up
Romo: Awesome.
Barry Zito: I'll try. Let's see. I don't want anyone to think about my contract anymore when I'm pitching.
A second monkey paw finger curls up
Romo: Cooooool.
Brandon Belt politely takes the paw from Zito.
Brandon Belt: Okay, when Skip told me I was called up for the first time, I felt something I'd never felt before. A rush of endorphins, a feeling of pride ... it was amazing. I want to have that feeling again and again. I just want to relive and repeat that moment forever.
A third monkey paw finger curls up
Belt: I don't know if anything is happening.
Brian Wilson: This paw is no stranger to mystery and danger. I can tell by its calm demeanor and silent whispers. Okay, monkey paw friend, I would like my assassin feet to be ever silent when I'm saving the world from your monkey assassin friends.
The monkey paw looks confused at first, then sort of bored
Romo: How can a monkey paw look confused then bored?
Zito: Don't know, but there it was.
A fourth monkey paw finger curls up
Tim Lincecum: Hey, I want a Red Bull.
A Red Bull appears in his hands. The last monkey paw finger curls up
Lincecum: Whoa. Sweet.
Brian Sabean: What's going on, fellas?
Romo: This monkey paw was giving out wishes and everything.
Sabean: Oh, no. I was too late. I would have wished for a World Series victory. A thrilling, magical World Series victory. Just one. I don't care if it doesn't get me respect. I don't care if it's followed by a horrific, injury-filled year. I don't care. We came so close last year. If Guillen catches that ball in Game Seven ... we came so, so close. I just want to win it all once.
The middle monkey paw finger uncurls. A light flashes. Sabean is now in a clubhouse chair. Everyone else is going about their business.
Romo: Hey, man. What are you doing?
Sabean: Where did the monkey paw go? I asked for just one World Series title.
Romo: Monkey paw? That thing's been gone for months.
Rowand: And we did win the World Series. We beat Cliff Lee and everything. Well, I use "we," loosely, but you know what I mean.
Sabean: But I don't remember it. Last year?
Zito: Yeah, but you cursed us all. That paw was cursed. I didn't want people to think about my contract when I pitched, and now I can't pitch because I'm hurt.
Belt: You keep sending me back to the minors so I can get recalled over and over again.
Lincecum: I drank a Red Bull and couldn't fall asleep a couple of months ago. It was horrible.
Wilson: I can't throw a strike. I'm pretty sure the paw did that as an affront to my own assassin powers.
Rowand: I can't stop doing this:
Rowand: I try and I try, but I can't stop doing this every time I hit. It's driving me insane.Cain: Also, every ******* player on the ******* team is ******* injured all to **** right now.
Sabean: But we won the World Series?
Affeldt: Yeah. It was pretty awesome.
Romo: Totally awesome.
Sabean sits down and starts to daydream. He can't remember the last year ... but he's strangely content. A smile creeps over his face. He opens his eyes, with his face bright and cheery. A clubhouse attendant walks buy. Sabean furrows his brow and looks at him.
Sabean: Why does that guy have a golden dong on the back of his hat?
Fin
626 comments
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That’s….bad?
"If it's weird, you know it's probably Wilson's." - Matt Cain
by EliminateMe on Aug 17, 2011 12:28 PM PDT up reply actions
Oooh. Maybe I'll get ice cream after work
Spent all day browsing opposition research. Democrats are naughty, naughty people.
Gigante. Campeón. Pumpkin. Andrés Torres.
Dursh nerf darsh narf. Poop.
Note: Opposition research makes everyone look naughty.
Gigante. Campeón. Pumpkin. Andrés Torres.
Dursh nerf darsh narf. Poop.
So it’s not a tremendously surprising discovery that that was indeed your conclusion.
TheLetter2: East Coast Boogaloo
Not surprising, no.
But it has made me want ice cream.
Gigante. Campeón. Pumpkin. Andrés Torres.
Dursh nerf darsh narf. Poop.
Oh my…
(315) SF Giants and NY Jets
Giants baseball: TORTURE
...and the home of the... JETS!
by GiantsfaninNY55 on Aug 17, 2011 1:07 PM PDT up reply actions
Politicians should always eat cylindrical food from the side.
Gigante. Campeón. Pumpkin. Andrés Torres.
Dursh nerf darsh narf. Poop.
Both sides of the mouth at the same time, amirite?!
/cynical
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:18 PM PDT up reply actions
Why did I click on that?
Proud parent of SD-born Shane Loux.
If Cain is with us, who can be against us? - atxgiantsfan
I even checked the link before I clicked
“It can’t be that bad,” I thought. I now must conclude that I erred in my assessment.
Make fun all you want, but as a Giants fan I appreciate her work on H.Res. 373: A symbolic resolution without force of law expressing support for the idea of naming September "National Hydrocephalus Awareness Month."
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 2:30 PM PDT up reply actions
It's everything that's right with science
Decide on your conclusion then scour the data for any shred of supporting evidence.
Juan "Doesn't Cheat The Game" Perez, future CF for the World Champion San Francisco Giants.
"And besides, if I wanted to participate in a mindless patriotic ritual where my voice isn’t really heard, I would vote." - Chris Marcil
Publish findings in mass media, avoiding peer review
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
by shanghaijim on Aug 17, 2011 12:44 PM PDT up reply actions
/throw out all data points that disprove conclusion
by Every6thDay on Aug 17, 2011 12:47 PM PDT up reply actions
Lies, Damn Lies and Statistics!
Kickham where it hurts
by say hey nation on Aug 17, 2011 12:47 PM PDT up reply actions
“I’ve drafted a letter of resignation.”
“Well, you’re not going to give it to him. . . Cause that would deny me the pleasure of throwing you out through a plate glass window.”
by Every6thDay on Aug 17, 2011 12:49 PM PDT up reply actions
/McC pile on
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
by shanghaijim on Aug 17, 2011 12:42 PM PDT up reply actions
unf unf unf
Proud parent of SD-born Shane Loux.
If Cain is with us, who can be against us? - atxgiantsfan
Omg I can't believe I forgot to tell you
I bought a Nina Totenbag!
Gigante. Campeón. Pumpkin. Andrés Torres.
Dursh nerf darsh narf. Poop.
I love NPR, and I'm happy to offer it my private support
I just don’t think it should receive public funding.
Gigante. Campeón. Pumpkin. Andrés Torres.
Dursh nerf darsh narf. Poop.
It’s already gone into the opposition research.
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
by shanghaijim on Aug 17, 2011 12:55 PM PDT up reply actions
I wonder if GiantPain is at all galooty.
Jonathan Sanchez: Often maddening to watch, but capable of perfection on a moment's notice---just like his adoptive father.
It hurt. But I'm still a SABR nerd.
Gigante. Campeón. Pumpkin. Andrés Torres.
Dursh nerf darsh narf. Poop.
And you're right about this one!
NPR funding is a subsidy for wealthy people. Here in San Francisco the city helps fund the Opera. The Opera!
NPR is the only radio station you can pick up in much of Meigs and Athens county, Ohio. Not many rich people, there.
Jonathan Sanchez: Often maddening to watch, but capable of perfection on a moment's notice---just like his adoptive father.
They'd have enough money to support those stations if they want to
Very little of NPRs funding comes from the government anyway.
But hey, agree to disagree.
Gigante. Campeón. Pumpkin. Andrés Torres.
Dursh nerf darsh narf. Poop.
Well, obviously not everyone who listens to NPR is wealthy
But it is, in aggregate, a wealthy demographic. Now if the government wanted to subsidize broadcasting in economically disadvantaged areas, that might be a worthy endeavor.
SF also sunk a bunch of money into Yoshi's
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:33 PM PDT up reply actions
heh
I’d like to see someone eat there without doing that.
May 29, 2010: Steven Revetria becomes Giants General Manager. The rest is history.
"118 elements, and still no stanfurdium"- carp, paraphrased
Bandwagons are fun- that's why people get on them in the first place.
by natteringnabob on Aug 17, 2011 2:05 PM PDT up reply actions
I have never actually seen an opera. The closest I got was a Pavarotti concert.
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
20% off for friends and family
TO PURCHASE TICKETS: Go to www.sfopera.com/offer , enter offer code FAF12
Giants 2010 in review: One Jerry Garcia bobblehead, one world championship. Questions?
I'M A WISH SOMETHIN
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Golden dong? I think I missed that one ;(
Proud new co-dad of Travis Ishikawa. And ishikaBOOM Goes the Dynamite.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 12:19 PM PDT up reply actions
Question, probably stupid
If you pitch 8 innings, and then give up a walkoff hit with, say, one out in the ninth, do you get credit for a complete game?
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
Not your exact criteria but close.
Kickham where it hurts
by say hey nation on Aug 17, 2011 12:21 PM PDT up reply actions
I know that that counts as a CG
so I assume that you would get credit if you started the ninth, then gave up a walk-off, but I’ve never actually seen it happen so I was just asking.
BTW, I opened that page and saw the score was 1-0, and I was like, “I bet Cain started this game.”
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
by free f.p. #14 on Aug 17, 2011 12:28 PM PDT up reply actions
If Guillen catches that ball in Game Seven … we came so, so close. I just want to win it all once.
Yeah, that totally woulda happened.
by Lies and Perfidy on Aug 17, 2011 12:20 PM PDT reply actions
Great read, Grant. And poor Timmy, to have been hurt worst of all. Insomnia is no joking matter.
TheLetter2: East Coast Boogaloo
I’ll give you my empathy, sir.
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
NOT GOOD ENOUGH
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 1:00 PM PDT up reply actions
Also, someone really needs to get that Hawaiian totem that Zito's been wearing around the clubhouse out of there.
Gigante. Campeón. Pumpkin. Andrés Torres.
Dursh nerf darsh narf. Poop.
“Quick- somebody go look for Vincent Price in a cave!”
by Dingoes Ate My Baby on Aug 17, 2011 12:25 PM PDT up reply actions
Olmec?
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 12:26 PM PDT up reply actions
HAVE SOME FUCKING RESPECT FOR JOHNNY BRAVO!!
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 12:33 PM PDT up reply actions
what the fuck really?
Goddamnit. /grabs shotgun, box of Morton’s, and piles into black Impala
C’mon TL2, we got to shake n bake
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
by shanghaijim on Aug 17, 2011 12:43 PM PDT up reply actions
/sings Kansas
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 12:45 PM PDT up reply actions
At what point in these stories do we have to start making out incestuously?
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
by shanghaijim on Aug 17, 2011 12:45 PM PDT up reply actions
/popcorn
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
by free f.p. #14 on Aug 17, 2011 12:46 PM PDT up reply actions
right. And then I start a gay relationship with an angel.
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
by shanghaijim on Aug 17, 2011 12:47 PM PDT up reply actions
Oh, CW.
Where even the extras are the hottest people you’ve ever seen in your life.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 12:48 PM PDT up reply actions
Nice
I think pain brings out your best work, Grant.
I'm as tall as Mel. Why can't I hit 500 home runs?
sounds like birth
Honorary parent of Duane Kuiper, beloved solar powered broadcaster and power hitting coach for the Giants.
by Giant Voodoo on Aug 17, 2011 12:29 PM PDT up reply actions
Beautiful story, Brisbee.
I believe Cain passed by the clubhouse trash can, looked inside, saw the monkey paw, took it out, and said, “All I want is some fucking run support.” Then he realized the monkey paw was already closed. He hung his head and whispered, “Goddammit.”
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
Someone wrap up Cain and Lincecum in bubble wrap.
Not only would it keep them safe, it would look funny! And all the other players could entertain themselves by popping the bubbles.
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 12:31 PM PDT reply actions 2 recs
Lincecum to the 15-dl DL with popped bubble
Gigante. Campeón. Pumpkin. Andrés Torres.
Dursh nerf darsh narf. Poop.
"Hey, no fair. You guys popped all my bubbles first!"
LOL CAIN DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO HAVE FUN
by Every6thDay on Aug 17, 2011 12:33 PM PDT up reply actions
That’s because nobody came by to sit at his table and pop his bubbles
by Dingoes Ate My Baby on Aug 17, 2011 12:40 PM PDT up reply actions
LOL
keithlaw keithlaw
You think he ains worth it? “@mikeaxisa: omg the angels are calling up Jerome Williams?”
Gigante. Campeón. Pumpkin. Andrés Torres.
Dursh nerf darsh narf. Poop.
If I had a 40, I'd pour some out
Juan "Doesn't Cheat The Game" Perez, future CF for the World Champion San Francisco Giants.
"And besides, if I wanted to participate in a mindless patriotic ritual where my voice isn’t really heard, I would vote." - Chris Marcil
And gills.
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 12:37 PM PDT up reply actions
The other kids in school were merciless about the caudal fin.
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 1:04 PM PDT up reply actions
It is a part of the syndrome that gave him his giraffeness
Brandon Belt: Okay, when Skip told I was called up for the first time, I felt something I’d never felt before.
Belt: You keep sending back to the minors so I can get recalled over and over again.
That was Grant’s best pickup line when he was single.
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 12:42 PM PDT up reply actions
First drafts:
I like your semicolon.
I like your colon.
Couldn’t help but notice your apostrophes.
Exclamation mark!
by Every6thDay on Aug 17, 2011 12:46 PM PDT up reply actions
‘I have quite the interrobang, I can assure you’
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 1:05 PM PDT up reply actions
Thank you
for skipping “I like your period.”
According to Eric Holder, Giants Baseball is NOT torture. OK, it is, but followed by a big bowl of ice cream.
Tim Lincecum: He's a biracial angel.
I have to believe they do.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 12:39 PM PDT up reply actions
Like a miner’s hat, but instead of a flashlight…
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 12:40 PM PDT up reply actions
a fleshlight?
According to Eric Holder, Giants Baseball is NOT torture. OK, it is, but followed by a big bowl of ice cream.
Tim Lincecum: He's a biracial angel.
by yoyomonster on Aug 17, 2011 12:52 PM PDT up reply actions
HAHA
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 12:38 PM PDT up reply actions
Rise of the Nipples of the Apes
Proud parent of SD-born Shane Loux.
If Cain is with us, who can be against us? - atxgiantsfan
Pig nipples are the creepiest thing about making bacon.
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 1:06 PM PDT up reply actions
Favorite monkey species! What is yours?
Mine is either the White Face Saki, or the Douc Langur
Kickham where it hurts
by say hey nation on Aug 17, 2011 12:40 PM PDT reply actions
That second one would scare the shit out of me if I came a cross it in real life.
"Man, you just can't beat a good bowl of gumbo." ~ William Nuschler Clark
I thought it was Victorino at first.
Thing A
by sam23 on Aug 17, 2011 12:49 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
Its like 18 inches tall
Kickham where it hurts
by say hey nation on Aug 17, 2011 12:50 PM PDT up reply actions
smaller is creepier
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
by shanghaijim on Aug 17, 2011 12:50 PM PDT up reply actions
twss
According to Eric Holder, Giants Baseball is NOT torture. OK, it is, but followed by a big bowl of ice cream.
Tim Lincecum: He's a biracial angel.
by yoyomonster on Aug 17, 2011 12:53 PM PDT up reply actions
Always happy to finish someone off.
Proud parent of SD-born Shane Loux.
If Cain is with us, who can be against us? - atxgiantsfan
Might as well nail the 4th one too.
Giants 2010 in review: One Jerry Garcia bobblehead, one world championship. Questions?
The 4th hole is reserved for rbis only.
by GuyWhiteyCorngood on Aug 17, 2011 1:49 PM PDT up reply actions
Sock
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 1:06 PM PDT up reply actions
More Monkey Paw wishes
Buster Posey: I don’t want to have to play catcher for the rest of my career
Freddy Sanchez: I want to be able to spend more time with my family
Santiago Casilla: I want to be the greatest hitter of all time
Aubrey Huff: I want to have a career year.
Cody Ross: I want every pitcher I face to be like Roy Halladay
Quote from my adopted son Mike Krukow: "We're the Giants. We're San Francisco. And we're World Series Champions!"
by DFARowand on Aug 17, 2011 12:41 PM PDT reply actions 2 recs
don't forget:
Miguel Tejada: I wish I wasn’t the worst infielder on this team.
Monday Monkey lives for the weekend, sir.
These are pretty hilarious and horribly sad at the same time.
Ross on Halladay: "I’d tried everything against him…going the other way, taking pitches, trying to walk…and nothing worked. I’d never tried going up there and just trying to hit a home run off him."
My boy has mad hops
I rant on Twitter
Couple more
Whiteside: When people think of me I want them to think of my offense first
Carlos Beltran: I want to make a seamless transition into the Giants offense
Bruce Bochy: I want people to think of me in the same sentence as managerial greats like Tony Larussa
Quote from my adopted son Mike Krukow: "We're the Giants. We're San Francisco. And we're World Series Champions!"
Spike Lee reference
Honorary parent of Duane Kuiper, beloved solar powered broadcaster and power hitting coach for the Giants.
by Giant Voodoo on Aug 17, 2011 1:09 PM PDT up reply actions
I didn't know Jonathan Sanchez was a clubhouse attendant.
A clubhouse attendant walks buy
and who does buy play for?
Brian Wilson: "Don't Quote Me"
Buster Posey: "I Ain't Havin' It"
Pat Burrell: "The Patural"
Aubrey Huff: "Let's Get Weird"
by slackersphere17 on Aug 17, 2011 12:43 PM PDT reply actions
yeah, I guess I should just ignore my dad’s email forwards. No good can come of responding, especially with facts.
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
About once a year I get into a heated sports argument with my dad
After which I decide it’s not worth the grief. It usually takes about a year to forget the lesson.
Juan "Doesn't Cheat The Game" Perez, future CF for the World Champion San Francisco Giants.
"And besides, if I wanted to participate in a mindless patriotic ritual where my voice isn’t really heard, I would vote." - Chris Marcil
My dad implies that I’m a vapid fangirl who doesn’t know anything about baseball, and that’s why I think RBI’s are a dumb stat and Aaron Rowand is a terrible hitter.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
Oh wow.
Jonathan Sanchez: Often maddening to watch, but capable of perfection on a moment's notice---just like his adoptive father.
Well, he “knows something about baseball” because he coached in junior college and high school 30 years ago. Dick Tidrow came out and talked to the players a couple of times when my dad was coaching at Mt. Eden in the ’70’s, but apparently my dad didn’t learn anything.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
I just hate that he has to be sexist about it, too. Lots of us have family members who are RIBEYEZ types, but at least there isn’t a gender issue.
Jonathan Sanchez: Often maddening to watch, but capable of perfection on a moment's notice---just like his adoptive father.
Apparently if you befriend a few minor leaguers, and go to a couple of Giants charity events, you are not capable of rational baseball thought. I think he’s probably just insecure but, you’re right, it’s a shitty thing to say either way.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
Dads don’t react well to being gainsaid by their progeny.
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 1:08 PM PDT up reply actions
Is your dad Brian Sabean?
According to Eric Holder, Giants Baseball is NOT torture. OK, it is, but followed by a big bowl of ice cream.
Tim Lincecum: He's a biracial angel.
by yoyomonster on Aug 17, 2011 12:55 PM PDT up reply actions
I think Brian Sabean would be nicer to me.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
Pop and I WISH we could talk baseball with my sister, but alas, she would only watch to check them out. Ugh.
Suck it Mat Latos rolls off the tongue so nicely
by Cant_buy_a_run on Aug 18, 2011 9:21 AM PDT up reply actions
i'd run away .......
if that were the case. lol.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:01 PM PDT up reply actions
I can diagnose this for you, just do the following...
Do me a favor: take a step back from your computer, spread your legs, and punch yourself in the dick as hard as you can.
Feel that?
If you did, then you’re a normal sports fan. If you didn’t, then you’re most likely a SABR nerd living in a faux-reality that completely ignores all human existence.
Kickham where it hurts
by say hey nation on Aug 17, 2011 12:51 PM PDT up reply actions
LOL
Except I’m a girl.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
Find someone else's dick to punch then.
Ross on Halladay: "I’d tried everything against him…going the other way, taking pitches, trying to walk…and nothing worked. I’d never tried going up there and just trying to hit a home run off him."
My boy has mad hops
I rant on Twitter
That sounds… like not my cup of tea. But, thanks for the idea!
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
I am pretty sure there used to be pages on craigslist that could have helped you with it.
Ross on Halladay: "I’d tried everything against him…going the other way, taking pitches, trying to walk…and nothing worked. I’d never tried going up there and just trying to hit a home run off him."
My boy has mad hops
I rant on Twitter
I wish I shared sports with my dad
cause this is politics. oh, and religion, cause I asked if he could square both of those given one particular candidates views on my father’s religion.
big time fun.
should keep my yap shut.
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
I wish
Jews are awesome.
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
My family refuses to believe I’m Jewish. Which is odd, because complete strangers seem to think I am.
TheLetter2: East Coast Boogaloo
You’re an erudite gay man of small stature who lives in Tennessee and follows a San Francisco baseball team. I mean obviously you must be Jewish.
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
by shanghaijim on Aug 17, 2011 12:53 PM PDT up reply actions
Also, I sprinkle Yiddish exclamations into everyday speech. So I guess it’s not all that unreasonable assumption.
TheLetter2: East Coast Boogaloo
My wife picked a tile that has Sha’lom Y’all written on it while she was in Alabama for a conference.
Kickham where it hurts
by say hey nation on Aug 17, 2011 12:55 PM PDT up reply actions
A feier zol im trefen!
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 12:57 PM PDT up reply actions
Are you legion?
That Anonymous thing makes them sound like a group of annoying teenagers.
"Career potential: situational lefty." Situation: Ragnarok, bases loaded, Odin at the plate. You know who's getting the call.
-Adopted Giant: Dan Runzler
Greenberg and Koufax are pretty good standard bearers, though
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
Braun! Kinsler!
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
by shanghaijim on Aug 17, 2011 12:55 PM PDT up reply actions
Great read!
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:14 PM PDT up reply actions
Rod Carew
He converted.
According to Eric Holder, Giants Baseball is NOT torture. OK, it is, but followed by a big bowl of ice cream.
Tim Lincecum: He's a biracial angel.
still counts! He was my favorite player as a kid because he was a Yid. I was crushed for a day or two when I discovered he really wasn’t until I realized that becoming one by choice is even cooler.
by Dingoes Ate My Baby on Aug 17, 2011 2:14 PM PDT up reply actions
Jose Bautista is jewish?
Kickham where it hurts
by say hey nation on Aug 17, 2011 1:00 PM PDT up reply actions
Ryan Braun is one of my favorite non Giants. Hilarious
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
Hebrew Hammer!
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:14 PM PDT up reply actions
At this point, that nickname is only slightly more creative than “Chief” for every native American player in the deadball era.
I'm as tall as Mel. Why can't I hit 500 home runs?
This is true.
Alliteration is fun though.
(links to movie website about baseball in Israel)
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:21 PM PDT up reply actions
Well, you can’t all be baseball players. We need doctors.
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
by shanghaijim on Aug 17, 2011 12:56 PM PDT up reply actions
Shawn Green!
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
for his Dodgerness?
he was a pretty good player.
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
I'm lucky there
As I skew religiously and politically the same as my immediate family. I would not want to have those arguments with them.
Juan "Doesn't Cheat The Game" Perez, future CF for the World Champion San Francisco Giants.
"And besides, if I wanted to participate in a mindless patriotic ritual where my voice isn’t really heard, I would vote." - Chris Marcil
I always wonder how people end up with such different political and religious beliefs from their immediate families.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
It's easy.
Some people are stupid.
I never talk politics with my immediate family.
Ross on Halladay: "I’d tried everything against him…going the other way, taking pitches, trying to walk…and nothing worked. I’d never tried going up there and just trying to hit a home run off him."
My boy has mad hops
I rant on Twitter
this
that was out the window right about the same time it became verboten on McC.
May 29, 2010: Steven Revetria becomes Giants General Manager. The rest is history.
"118 elements, and still no stanfurdium"- carp, paraphrased
Bandwagons are fun- that's why people get on them in the first place.
by natteringnabob on Aug 17, 2011 12:58 PM PDT up reply actions
I think if ideology is expressed as control then it’s up for grabs when the rebellion/individuation comes along.
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
by shanghaijim on Aug 17, 2011 12:57 PM PDT up reply actions
opposites attract.
i never talk religion or politics. i talk sports.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 12:59 PM PDT up reply actions
Actually true
I have never in my life dated a Democrat, even though I tend to lean pretty far left. I also have always dated religious girls, even though I have never gone to church.
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
by free f.p. #14 on Aug 17, 2011 1:12 PM PDT up reply actions
I actually dated a few guys who didn't like sports.
But I married my husband.
Get well soon, Buster & Freddy.
All of these guys are goofs. - G. Brisbee
That’s another one! I’ve never dated a baseball fan, though I suppose a lot of girls are like that.
One of my ex’s was a pretty big Chargers fan, though.
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
by free f.p. #14 on Aug 17, 2011 1:15 PM PDT up reply actions
two of my exes were huge Steelers fans ...........
never again.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:17 PM PDT up reply actions
why, were you sore after?
According to Eric Holder, Giants Baseball is NOT torture. OK, it is, but followed by a big bowl of ice cream.
Tim Lincecum: He's a biracial angel.
after that damned Super Bowl .......
i kept getting texts from both of them (they didn’t know each other or anything and i dated them at separate times), bashing the 49ers saying they don’t have 6. grrrrrrrr!!!
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:22 PM PDT up reply actions
i dated them at separate times
I love that you clarified this.
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
by free f.p. #14 on Aug 17, 2011 1:26 PM PDT up reply actions
what can i say?
i’m a one girl kinda guy. :P
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:28 PM PDT up reply actions
i should rephrase that .......
i’m a one girl at a time kinda guy.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:30 PM PDT up reply actions
I always — wrongly, it turned out — thought guys would be into a girl who was a sports fan. Most of them either don’t seem to care or are weirded out by it.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
:^O
i’d kill for a girl who’s into sports. haven’t found her yet.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:20 PM PDT up reply actions
There are tons of us. You’ll find her. :)
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
i have no doubt.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:26 PM PDT up reply actions
Maybe you should check before you kill.
Ross on Halladay: "I’d tried everything against him…going the other way, taking pitches, trying to walk…and nothing worked. I’d never tried going up there and just trying to hit a home run off him."
My boy has mad hops
I rant on Twitter
LOL!
i’m not gonna kill anybody.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:23 PM PDT up reply actions
THIS
so much this.
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
by free f.p. #14 on Aug 17, 2011 1:27 PM PDT up reply actions
My husband is “meh” on sports. It’s his only fault.
I DON'T BELIEVE YOU (AGAIN) [now with theme song]
I tweet (and occasionally blarg,) | Your San Francisco Giants: "Together We're Broken!"
I would be okay with that, I guess, because I like doing my own thing.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
I would probably feel less guilty watching so much baseball if he watched with me. I’d also probably go to more games.
But whatevs – the rest is wonderful. So I’m satisfied.
I DON'T BELIEVE YOU (AGAIN) [now with theme song]
I tweet (and occasionally blarg,) | Your San Francisco Giants: "Together We're Broken!"
:)
I do kind of just want someone who will sit on the couch with me and drink bear and watch baseball. Or who doesn’t mind doing the drive to San Jose and back all in one day. ;-)
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
hahaha
I think TL2 could help you drink bear!
May 29, 2010: Steven Revetria becomes Giants General Manager. The rest is history.
"118 elements, and still no stanfurdium"- carp, paraphrased
Bandwagons are fun- that's why people get on them in the first place.
by natteringnabob on Aug 17, 2011 1:26 PM PDT up reply actions
Wow. A bear-drinker? Hardcore. No wonder you haven’t been able to find anyone.
Jonathan Sanchez: Often maddening to watch, but capable of perfection on a moment's notice---just like his adoptive father.
No, no, no.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 1:28 PM PDT up reply actions
Yes.
That. That’s exactly what I meant!
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
Perhaps a more active/outdoorsy bear?
It’s LOVE! 
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:29 PM PDT up reply actions
Delicious. The Hop Rod Rye is one of the best beers ever!
Jonathan Sanchez: Often maddening to watch, but capable of perfection on a moment's notice---just like his adoptive father.
They had some variation of their Red Rocket that was barrel aged and mixed with chardonnay juice… good god was that an amazing beer.
Cafe Racer 15 is awesome, too, and it will kick your ass.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 1:31 PM PDT up reply actions
Damn. I only have access to the mainstream ones.
Jonathan Sanchez: Often maddening to watch, but capable of perfection on a moment's notice---just like his adoptive father.
Yeah; not much gets out past the brewpub in Healdsburg, even here in SF.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 1:34 PM PDT up reply actions
That's weird.
That’s me and the girl I was dating at the time front & center in this video.
That ended badly (unrelated to sports) and this week I’ve been hanging out a lot with a very cute girl who spent the entire postseason watching the games at Toronado, and we’re going to a game for her birthday.
Girls who’re into sports are awesome.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 1:23 PM PDT up reply actions
Aw, that video is great!
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
WHATEVER.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 1:34 PM PDT up reply actions
Well, yeah, maybe that wasn’t the best thing to say given that your relationship ended badly. Sorry. :(
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
Heh, no worries. That was meant to be funny. Stupid Internet.
Also, the aforementioned other cute Giants fan is healing the last of those wounds quite nicely. :)
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 1:39 PM PDT up reply actions
Also, I goddamn love all of those celebration/reaction videos. :)
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 1:40 PM PDT up reply actions
I am featured somewhat in TGWTWS youtube video filmed at Mijita.
I love watching all of em. NYC also a fun video.
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:57 PM PDT up reply actions
d'awwww.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:25 PM PDT up reply actions
......... your husband doesn't like sports?
bummer.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:16 PM PDT up reply actions
The point was he does like sports.
Get well soon, Buster & Freddy.
All of these guys are goofs. - G. Brisbee
ooooh .......
i see now. i’m glad to hear that. dating someone who doesn’t like or interested in sports is the worst.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:19 PM PDT up reply actions
Well, there was one guy who didn’t like sports, but his step-dad was a Giants season ticket holder. I got to go to lots of games for a couple of years.
Get well soon, Buster & Freddy.
All of these guys are goofs. - G. Brisbee
niiiiiice.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:37 PM PDT up reply actions
Woody or Gardy always seemed to be pitching, tho. I think there may have been a reason.
Get well soon, Buster & Freddy.
All of these guys are goofs. - G. Brisbee
Yeah, pretty much. They were on the 3rd base side, with a nice view of Bonds, tho.
Get well soon, Buster & Freddy.
All of these guys are goofs. - G. Brisbee
that’s so awesome.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:47 PM PDT up reply actions
I dumb-lucked my way into front row LF seats for Bonds’ last game.
Friend of mine’s family business has seats right on the bullpen, and she called me that day to see if I wanted to go. “FUCK YES.” Called up my roommates, who I’d bought tickets with- “Uh yeah, I’m not sitting with you tonight, sorry.”
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 1:50 PM PDT up reply actions
i wouldn’t expect anything more than that.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:48 PM PDT up reply actions
well, there’s only so much influence a family has. At some point, there’s more information than just that, not to mention a slew of different environment variables. I didn’t grow up in Texas, and my father did.
Especially if you are the type that goes looking for your own answers and your family has always been ok with what they’ve been told.
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
I am really impressed with those who don’t just fall in line.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
I knew a girl raised by strict atheist communists. She was the most conservative girl I ever met and planned to enter the convent.
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
My parents are both fairly liberal, and I turned our somewhat conservative. Not the same thing, I know, but just saying.
"Career potential: situational lefty." Situation: Ragnarok, bases loaded, Odin at the plate. You know who's getting the call.
-Adopted Giant: Dan Runzler
I bet it’s degree, too.
Me, I never rebelled. There was nothing to rebel against. My parents were all, “Do whatever you want, we just want you to be happy. Here, have some more money. Might as well spend it now then wait till we’re dead.”
Although for a while in my twenties I wanted to reject their generosity and resent the freedom they gave me, since I ended up not doing anything. By now I think I’ve just accepted my failure to launch.
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
It's interesting to hear people complain about their parents not giving them money.
My parents give me money whenever I ask for it, but I think that’s probably because I don’t ask for money very often.
"Lee pitches...Renteria hits a high drive, deep left-center field, David Murphy going back, he's on the warning track—it is...go-one!"
It's a white thing
Something about kicking the kids out as soon as possible and not having anything to do with them
Filipino parents like to keep the family together. We’re all adorably infantile.
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
I have more money than my parents now. That’s taken some adjusting to.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
I’m white and never had that experience.
Proud parent of SD-born Shane Loux.
If Cain is with us, who can be against us? - atxgiantsfan
same way a white guy with idiotic racists parent ends up marrying a black woman
The thong is, it happened.
Wow
Good for you. Mrs. Goofus is a keeper!
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
agreed
She also puts up with me, which is above and beyond the call of duty
The thong is, it happened.
I wish I could ignore my dad’s hurled, half-full glasses of Laphroaig.
"Career potential: situational lefty." Situation: Ragnarok, bases loaded, Odin at the plate. You know who's getting the call.
-Adopted Giant: Dan Runzler
Well, maybe next time you will take out the fucking garbage without being asked!
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 1:12 PM PDT up reply actions
He doesn’t strike me as a whisky-waster.
Giants 2010 in review: One Jerry Garcia bobblehead, one world championship. Questions?
BOURBON BOBBLER
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:21 PM PDT up reply actions
Scotch Scorner
According to Eric Holder, Giants Baseball is NOT torture. OK, it is, but followed by a big bowl of ice cream.
Tim Lincecum: He's a biracial angel.
VODKA VAPORIZER
(any real-life similarities to GAH_WP are coincidental)
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:24 PM PDT up reply actions
GRAIN GUZZLER
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:39 PM PDT up reply actions
BROWNIE
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 3:08 PM PDT up reply actions
SavvySabes (Not) Brian Sabean
On doctor’s orders, I am not kicking tires for the foreseeable future. BS #SFGiants #MLB
Ross on Halladay: "I’d tried everything against him…going the other way, taking pitches, trying to walk…and nothing worked. I’d never tried going up there and just trying to hit a home run off him."
My boy has mad hops
I rant on Twitter
This was awesome.
(315) SF Giants and NY Jets
Giants baseball: TORTURE
...and the home of the... JETS!
by GiantsfaninNY55 on Aug 17, 2011 1:01 PM PDT reply actions
LOLINEUP!
SFGiants San Francisco Giants
#SFGiants lineup: Ross cf, Fontenot 2b, Sandoval 3b, Huff 1b, Schierholtz rf, Cabrera ss, Belt lf, Whiteside c, Cain p
Lucky you
Less torture.
Juan "Doesn't Cheat The Game" Perez, future CF for the World Champion San Francisco Giants.
"And besides, if I wanted to participate in a mindless patriotic ritual where my voice isn’t really heard, I would vote." - Chris Marcil
My dentist is going to try to get me to have my wisdom teeth out AND get Invisalign.
I will repeat “I’m sorry, I don’t have five thousand dollars, and if I did …”
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
yeah, I think I’m going to need braces. Again.
so lame.
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
Well don’t forget to wear your retainer next time, then!
I DON'T BELIEVE YOU (AGAIN) [now with theme song]
I tweet (and occasionally blarg,) | Your San Francisco Giants: "Together We're Broken!"
Hey man
If there’s Belt, I’m watching. This lineup ain’t so bad.
Gigante. Campeón. Pumpkin. Andrés Torres.
Dursh nerf darsh narf. Poop.
LOL Belt batting behind Cabrera
Quote from my adopted son Mike Krukow: "We're the Giants. We're San Francisco. And we're World Series Champions!"
Thats my only real gripe with this lineup and this roster.
Kickham where it hurts
by say hey nation on Aug 17, 2011 1:06 PM PDT up reply actions
Could be worse, I guess.
Jonathan Sanchez: Often maddening to watch, but capable of perfection on a moment's notice---just like his adoptive father.
DON'T TEASE THE MONKEY PAW!
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:15 PM PDT up reply actions
TICKLE TICKLE
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
the sad thing is I’m not sure if you could say “it could be better” because other than starting DeRosa or putting Stewart at first, that’s about it.
by Dingoes Ate My Baby on Aug 17, 2011 2:16 PM PDT up reply actions
Meh
It’s probably the best we can run out right now.
Ross on Halladay: "I’d tried everything against him…going the other way, taking pitches, trying to walk…and nothing worked. I’d never tried going up there and just trying to hit a home run off him."
My boy has mad hops
I rant on Twitter
are we sure "running" a line-up is a safe idea?
Perhaps wheel it out carefully, wrapped in bubble wrap.
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:16 PM PDT up reply actions
or something
he’s well enough to play, at least.
May 29, 2010: Steven Revetria becomes Giants General Manager. The rest is history.
"118 elements, and still no stanfurdium"- carp, paraphrased
Bandwagons are fun- that's why people get on them in the first place.
by natteringnabob on Aug 17, 2011 1:25 PM PDT up reply actions
No Tejada, plus Belt
Mediocrity! Not absolute garbage! Progress Bochy! Hooray! :D
(315) SF Giants and NY Jets
Giants baseball: TORTURE
...and the home of the... JETS!
by GiantsfaninNY55 on Aug 17, 2011 1:06 PM PDT up reply actions
NATE!
Sorry… got a little excited there.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
#DongsOfSF
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:04 PM PDT reply actions
OFF
Dear God – OFF
/cries
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:16 PM PDT up reply actions
extrabaggs Andrew Baggarly
Jonathan Sanchez is walking without crutches (but limping a bit). No DL decision yet.
If he just rolled it, it should be fine in a few days, right?
Ross on Halladay: "I’d tried everything against him…going the other way, taking pitches, trying to walk…and nothing worked. I’d never tried going up there and just trying to hit a home run off him."
My boy has mad hops
I rant on Twitter
It just needs to calm down.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
That works best if a few ribs are removed.
May 29, 2010: Steven Revetria becomes Giants General Manager. The rest is history.
"118 elements, and still no stanfurdium"- carp, paraphrased
Bandwagons are fun- that's why people get on them in the first place.
by natteringnabob on Aug 17, 2011 1:25 PM PDT up reply actions
/Steps on Freddie Freeman's banana peel and slips
Freddie Freeman grunts his approval as he rubs some rocks together
/walks without crutches
/without crutches steals second
"I could hear the angry MCC cacophany in my head."--Oldjacket, 7/4/10
by Kitspool on Aug 17, 2011 1:08 PM PDT up reply actions 11 recs
ZING
Anagram of "SF Giants World Series Champs" = SHARP, ORGASMIC, ENDLESS SWIFT
by Stuttering John Tamargo on Aug 17, 2011 1:40 PM PDT up reply actions
haha that’s awesome.
WHOSE POOL? KITSPOOL!
by shaggingflyballs on Aug 17, 2011 1:57 PM PDT up reply actions
Pshhh!!
He’s been walking everyone without crutches for FOREVER.
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Maybe he misses a start?
Do we have any off days coming up where his start could be skipped?
The thong is, it happened.
No
Giants need a fifth starter at least six more times: August 21, August 27, September 6, September 13, September 18, September 24.
"Lee pitches...Renteria hits a high drive, deep left-center field, David Murphy going back, he's on the warning track—it is...go-one!"
If Dirty's only going to miss one start
I’m go with 3 innings each from Mota and Runzler
The thong is, it happened.
lol todd linden?
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
What?
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
I just google news searched him, and this was the headline I found
Linden’s salami sinks Fieldera
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
ok
well, that’s either very poor or very excellent headline writing
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
There’s a typo — should be “Fielders.”
But, yeah, pretty hilarious.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
Linden: My Salami is a veritable HMS Titanic
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
OMG.
I had a mini crush on Todd Linden when he was around.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
I have a TL autographed baseball.
Giants 2010 in review: One Jerry Garcia bobblehead, one world championship. Questions?
That’s awesome. That’s better than my Ryan Garko autographed picture.
@legaleagle88
Giants Baseball: Why Not?
I thought Nate Schierholtz was cool before it was cool to think Nate Schierholtz was cool.
left or right?
According to Eric Holder, Giants Baseball is NOT torture. OK, it is, but followed by a big bowl of ice cream.
Tim Lincecum: He's a biracial angel.
ball point or sharpie?
According to Eric Holder, Giants Baseball is NOT torture. OK, it is, but followed by a big bowl of ice cream.
Tim Lincecum: He's a biracial angel.
I read that as
I have a TL2 autographed baseball
and I was like, I WANT ONE!
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
by free f.p. #14 on Aug 17, 2011 1:29 PM PDT up reply actions
mccoveychron McCovey Chronicles
Eri Yoshida, the 19-year-old Japanese woman knuckleballer, won her last start in the NPBL. One strikeout. Todd Linden. http://t.co/evbRkQY
I didn;t know he was still around
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
Apparently, his salami is legendary.
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 1:11 PM PDT up reply actions
What about his zucchini?
"Career potential: situational lefty." Situation: Ragnarok, bases loaded, Odin at the plate. You know who's getting the call.
-Adopted Giant: Dan Runzler
It’s jealous.
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 1:13 PM PDT up reply actions
DARN TOOTIN'!
"Career potential: situational lefty." Situation: Ragnarok, bases loaded, Odin at the plate. You know who's getting the call.
-Adopted Giant: Dan Runzler
The LGBT community is making an “It Gets Better” video for the Giants.
Bruce Bochy would like you to look at the career numbers and stop complaining.
Bob Howry's #1 (and only) fan!!!
The Merkin Valdez of McCovey Chronicles!!!!!!
by cheno on Aug 17, 2011 1:11 PM PDT reply actions 17 recs
hahahaaha
Honorary parent of Duane Kuiper, beloved solar powered broadcaster and power hitting coach for the Giants.
by Giant Voodoo on Aug 17, 2011 1:13 PM PDT up reply actions
Brilliant!
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:17 PM PDT up reply actions
When did this happen?
Apparently Alfred Simon is starting (regularly!) for Baltimore. Apparently him being a crappy reliever wasn’t enough innings of crap for them. He is currently getting clobbered by Oakland’s lineup.
I'm as tall as Mel. Why can't I hit 500 home runs?
You forgot to mention
that Ratto eats the monkey paw after wishing to become a journalist.
Honorary parent of Duane Kuiper, beloved solar powered broadcaster and power hitting coach for the Giants.
Anyone listen to The Hold Steady?
I am on a major binge right now.
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
This season may not end well, but I'm going to stick around for the ride
Brian Wilson: "Don't Quote Me"
Buster Posey: "I Ain't Havin' It"
Pat Burrell: "The Patural"
Aubrey Huff: "Let's Get Weird"
by slackersphere17 on Aug 17, 2011 1:19 PM PDT reply actions
"Do you know anything about monkey curses?"
“a bit, yeah.”
“She knows a bit about monkey curses? A bit? Didn’t get the whole diploma in monkey curses, just minored in it.”
Honorary parent of Duane Kuiper, beloved solar powered broadcaster and power hitting coach for the Giants.
GIBBON GRABBER
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
MONKEY MUGGER
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 1:31 PM PDT up reply actions
LEMUR LOVER
Brian Wilson: "Don't Quote Me"
Buster Posey: "I Ain't Havin' It"
Pat Burrell: "The Patural"
Aubrey Huff: "Let's Get Weird"
by slackersphere17 on Aug 17, 2011 1:33 PM PDT up reply actions
PRIMATE PRODDER
Can't spell "Colletti" without LOL.
CHIMP CHASER
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:35 PM PDT up reply actions
Silverback Stroker
According to Eric Holder, Giants Baseball is NOT torture. OK, it is, but followed by a big bowl of ice cream.
Tim Lincecum: He's a biracial angel.
SPIDER MONKEY SPANKER
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:44 PM PDT up reply actions
PLEEPLEUS PUMPER
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 1:45 PM PDT up reply actions
TAMARIN TEASER
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:51 PM PDT up reply actions
BONOBO BONER
Jonathan Sanchez: Often maddening to watch, but capable of perfection on a moment's notice---just like his adoptive father.
HOWLER HUSTLER
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 1:54 PM PDT up reply actions
GUENON GULPER
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 2:02 PM PDT up reply actions
SURILI SUCKER
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 2:05 PM PDT up reply actions
ORANGUTAN OUTSMARTER
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 2:03 PM PDT up reply actions
reminds me of this article
According to Eric Holder, Giants Baseball is NOT torture. OK, it is, but followed by a big bowl of ice cream.
Tim Lincecum: He's a biracial angel.
Wasn’t he a Giants catcher?
Anagram of "SF Giants World Series Champs" = SHARP, ORGASMIC, ENDLESS SWIFT
by Stuttering John Tamargo on Aug 17, 2011 1:38 PM PDT up reply actions
hahaha
No, that was Giuseppe Chimpanzee.
May 29, 2010: Steven Revetria becomes Giants General Manager. The rest is history.
"118 elements, and still no stanfurdium"- carp, paraphrased
Bandwagons are fun- that's why people get on them in the first place.
by natteringnabob on Aug 17, 2011 2:14 PM PDT up reply actions
Interesting
I was linked to this poll of “Best Sacramento Sports Blogger” at StR. Check out who is listed first:
http://sacramento.blogger.cbslocal.com/most-valuable-blogger/vote/sports/
You can do your part for all that’s righteous and good by voting for SactownRoyalty.com. When there’s an actual NBA to speak of, it’s one of the best blogs at SBNation.
LOL 22
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 1:47 PM PDT up reply actions
always
Jonathan Sanchez: Often maddening to watch, but capable of perfection on a moment's notice---just like his adoptive father.
Is Zito crying?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0MunT0NuXU&feature=player_detailpage#t=141s
Looks like he might be in Franchise preview. He did a sit down interview. I can just see it now, he breaks down because people don’t understand the pressures that such a huge contract brings etc….
Are you saying there isn’t massive pressure on Barry in trying to live up to a huge contract in a manner that he might not even be physically capable of doing, and doing so in front of tens of thousands of people and many more on TV and radio? Or just that you don’t give a damn if there is?
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 1:58 PM PDT up reply actions
MEN DONT CRY
IF I HAD A ZILLION DOLLARS ID SPEND IT ON HOOKERS AND BLOW
I'm not fat, I'm a carousel.
Your FB velocity would suffer.
Get well soon, Buster & Freddy.
All of these guys are goofs. - G. Brisbee
If I had a million dollars?
2 chicks at one time. With a million dollars, I believe I could hook that up. Chicks dig dudes with money.
not all money either….I’m not getting anywhere with my coin collection.
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 3:06 PM PDT up reply actions
The kinds of chicks who would double up on a guy like me do
Sharlon Schoop - honkbalspeler extraordinaire.
Trolls are like cockroach Nazis. Sure, you CAN try to reason with them, but they won't listen, and if you respond to them, they invade your Sudetenland.
Or something.
That metaphor got away from me.
Ratto: Giants down, but not out
http://www.csnbayarea.com/08/17/11/bRattob-Giants-down-but-not-out/landing_ratto_v3.html?full_args=08/17/11/bRattob-Giants-down-but-not-out/landing_ratto_v3&blockID=550280&feedID=2796
Ratto not being pessimistic? What will he think of next?
a diet? shaving his moussestache? I give up.
by shaggingflyballs on Aug 17, 2011 2:00 PM PDT up reply actions
w-a-y OT
Cookie Monster performs Tom Waits’ "God’s Away on Business" (new window)
Giants 2010 in review: One Jerry Garcia bobblehead, one world championship. Questions?
Heavy Light Show?
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 2:02 PM PDT up reply actions
LOL SCHULMAN
@JeffFletcher1
Quick: Who’s the only player in the majors whose career began in the ’80s?
@hankschulman
Wakefield
@JeffFletcher1
Apparently that was too easy. Almost all of you got it right (except for the guy who is an MLB beat writer who covered him): Omar Vizquel.
http://twitter.com/JeffFletcher1/status/103932014905933824
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
I knew Wakefield started in 1992. I had his rookie card. Dude had a great first year.
by Grant_ME_MERCY on Aug 17, 2011 2:07 PM PDT up reply actions
Wow
Maybe they should use those monkey paws for spare parts…
Baggs:
Keppinger has bone bruise. Was advised by hand specialist to not play. If he took another hit & fractured it, it would be career threatening
Fontenot needs to start hitting like he can. That would make this painless.
by Grant_ME_MERCY on Aug 17, 2011 2:12 PM PDT up reply actions
So Freeman is responsible for 2 Giants going on the DL
Wasn’t hit batting when Sanchez sprained his ankle?
Get well soon, Buster & Freddy.
All of these guys are goofs. - G. Brisbee
GREYSCALE
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 2:17 PM PDT up reply actions
CUT IT OFF NOW!!!
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 2:20 PM PDT up reply actions
Better update the list .......
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 2:18 PM PDT up reply actions
This picture is even freakier if you denote "back from DL"
Derosa, Belt, Tejada, Cody, Panda, Wilson, Fontenot
The thong is, it happened.
you asked for it ........
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 2:57 PM PDT up reply actions
Their smiles make me nervous.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 2:58 PM PDT up reply actions
they're trying to assure us ......
“Don’t worry, I wont get hurt!”
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 2:59 PM PDT up reply actions
Waived co-pay!!
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 3:05 PM PDT up reply actions
if you're a season ticket holder ........
a full refund.
if you’re just a fan ……..
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 3:10 PM PDT up reply actions
is that a sock hat? fuckin’ hipsters.
by shaggingflyballs on Aug 17, 2011 3:10 PM PDT up reply actions
lol. thanks .......
i’ll add Stewie next time.
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 3:23 PM PDT up reply actions
I didn’t even know Ford was on the DL. For what?
Get well soon, Buster & Freddy.
All of these guys are goofs. - G. Brisbee
Did his ankle (?) when he scored a game winning run at Mays Field a while back.
It seemed ominous to me at the time.
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 3:24 PM PDT up reply actions
one of the Giants' walk-off wins .......
here. quite sad because you can see Ford telling Ross he’s hurt, then Burrell runs up to him to celebrate, and Ross protects Ford by holding Burrell back saying, “Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!”
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 3:26 PM PDT up reply actions
Wow. That’s a really good recap video.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 3:34 PM PDT up reply actions
He's actually not any more
He’s now in Richmond after a stint in the AZL.
"If it's weird, you know it's probably Wilson's." - Matt Cain
BONE BRUISER
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
The roids gave him bulging muscles on his face.
by Grant_ME_MERCY on Aug 17, 2011 2:13 PM PDT up reply actions
RIP
Ross on Halladay: "I’d tried everything against him…going the other way, taking pitches, trying to walk…and nothing worked. I’d never tried going up there and just trying to hit a home run off him."
My boy has mad hops
I rant on Twitter
BONE BUMP
"A Giants game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings."
I'm an avid protester against "the Wave," "the Fist Pump Dance," and "Like a G-Man."
by GIANT stoner on Aug 17, 2011 2:13 PM PDT up reply actions
Uh oh
extrabaggs Andrew Baggarly
Giants will face Wandy, Lyles and … yes, former SF prospect Henry Sosa in Houston this weekend. It’s Vogelsong, Bumgarner and TBA for SF.
1 hour ago
That has ‘Sosa complete game shutout’ written all over it.
"I could hear the angry MCC cacophany in my head."--Oldjacket, 7/4/10
Teams are just rubbing it in these days, aren’t they?
by Dingoes Ate My Baby on Aug 17, 2011 2:23 PM PDT up reply actions
Reminds me of
“To blaaaaaaave…”
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 2:22 PM PDT up reply actions
Is there an easy way to see when players are going to be available to play again?
We need a Google calendar or something.
My son, so I'm told. And this stalwart young lad (Hi, free f.p. #14!).
I’m going down with the ship, even if I hate “Nearer My God to Thee”
by Dingoes Ate My Baby on Aug 17, 2011 2:31 PM PDT up reply actions
extrabaggs Andrew Baggarly
Brian Wilson out with inflamed elbow.
Croix De Candlestick: You'll be a better person for reading | My adopted Giant: the next Buster Posey, Johnny Monell
Salt in the wound.
Croix De Candlestick: You'll be a better person for reading | My adopted Giant: the next Buster Posey, Johnny Monell
HAHAHAHA
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 2:38 PM PDT up reply actions
sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet
Dude, where’s my arsenic?
May 29, 2010: Steven Revetria becomes Giants General Manager. The rest is history.
"118 elements, and still no stanfurdium"- carp, paraphrased
Bandwagons are fun- that's why people get on them in the first place.
by natteringnabob on Aug 17, 2011 2:39 PM PDT up reply actions
Thus possibly explaining the other night
by Dingoes Ate My Baby on Aug 17, 2011 2:40 PM PDT up reply actions
Okay now these guys are just showing off.
We get it. It takes incredible skill for a team to get injured all at once. Please stop.
Guess we’re bringing back the Battle of Thermopylae meme from yesterday for tonight’s game
by Dingoes Ate My Baby on Aug 17, 2011 2:42 PM PDT up reply actions
if it doesn’t calm down
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
That name sounds familiar
extrabaggs Andrew Baggarly
Wilson is in Pensacola to see Dr. James Andrews. Evaluations came back positive. Just inflammation. But will be out 2-3 days, Bochy said.
4 minutes ago
Maybe all that beard grooming has taken it’s toll on his shoulder?
by Dingoes Ate My Baby on Aug 17, 2011 2:42 PM PDT up reply actions
He’s already had TJ at least.
Get well soon, Buster & Freddy.
All of these guys are goofs. - G. Brisbee
Please don’t tell me that.
Get well soon, Buster & Freddy.
All of these guys are goofs. - G. Brisbee
You can
Hong-Chih Kuo has had it four times, which is the record as far as I can tell
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
by free f.p. #14 on Aug 17, 2011 2:47 PM PDT up reply actions
Xavier Nady has had it twice
which is odd, considering he’s, you know, an outfielder.
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
by free f.p. #14 on Aug 17, 2011 2:50 PM PDT up reply actions
Outfielders often throw the ball a long way.
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 3:05 PM PDT up reply actions
FOUR TOMMY JOHN'S?!?
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 2:50 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
mea culpa
whoops. large is large.
Where have you gone John Johnstone?
by glenallen hill's waterpipe on Aug 17, 2011 2:51 PM PDT up reply actions
Other notables to have had the surgery
Jake Delhomme, Deion Sanders, and Sebastian Janikowski (lol wut?)
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
by free f.p. #14 on Aug 17, 2011 2:51 PM PDT up reply actions
extrabaggs Andrew Baggarly
Wilson is in Pensacola to see Dr. James Andrews. Evaluations came back positive. Just inflammation. But will be out 2-3 days, Bochy said.
Croix De Candlestick: You'll be a better person for reading | My adopted Giant: the next Buster Posey, Johnny Monell
Trepanning!
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
Giants Baseball: The turkey's a little dry!
Wheeeeeeeeeeee.
by urea on Aug 17, 2011 2:44 PM PDT reply actions 3 recs
I think
it’s time you mirror-imaged your avatar. Just flipping it is insufficient to express the goings-on.
May 29, 2010: Steven Revetria becomes Giants General Manager. The rest is history.
"118 elements, and still no stanfurdium"- carp, paraphrased
Bandwagons are fun- that's why people get on them in the first place.
by natteringnabob on Aug 17, 2011 2:48 PM PDT up reply actions
Put a bandaid on it.
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 2:49 PM PDT up reply actions
15 day DL
Jose Flores: .831 OPS in High-A last year. .529 OPS this year. Ouch.
Co-dad of Ryan Scoma with waelwulf, because we're progressive like that.
by free f.p. #14 on Aug 17, 2011 2:50 PM PDT up reply actions
Giants Baseball: Did you hear something snap?
May 29, 2010: Steven Revetria becomes Giants General Manager. The rest is history.
"118 elements, and still no stanfurdium"- carp, paraphrased
Bandwagons are fun- that's why people get on them in the first place.
by natteringnabob on Aug 17, 2011 2:47 PM PDT up reply actions
Giant’s Baseball: Who’s on First? No, I’m serious, really- we don’t have anybody healthy enough to play
by Dingoes Ate My Baby on Aug 17, 2011 2:49 PM PDT up reply actions
LOL CSN
extrabaggs Andrew Baggarly
Disappointed that @CSNAuthentic cited me as reporting Sanchez was going on the DL. That was speculation earlier today, not a confirmed fact.
@HiHaterz!
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 2:48 PM PDT up reply actions
CLOWN OUTLET
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Ankles, wrists and elbows.
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 2:47 PM PDT reply actions
Wow, Ralph’s a bigger idiot than I thought. His solution to the #5 starter problem is to put the rest of the rotation on short rest and go with a 4 man rotation? Yeah, that’ll end well.
This is where differe
Wow, Ralph’s a bigger idiot than I thought.
There’s no way he could be a bigger idiot than I think he is
The thong is, it happened.
He could've gained weight.
According to Eric Holder, Giants Baseball is NOT torture. OK, it is, but followed by a big bowl of ice cream.
Tim Lincecum: He's a biracial angel.
The Giants are delicious!
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 2:56 PM PDT reply actions
You’re aware of the existence of candied bacon, right. :)
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 3:04 PM PDT up reply actions
Apparently, there’s even bacon jam. And you can make pie out of it.
Another reason pie is the preffered dessert.
Get well soon, Buster & Freddy.
All of these guys are goofs. - G. Brisbee
by Tortured on Aug 17, 2011 3:06 PM PDT up reply actions 1 recs
rec’d
Dearest, Susan - The Patron Saint of Patience
by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 17, 2011 3:06 PM PDT up reply actions
My friend just trademarked the phrase "bacon crack."
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 3:07 PM PDT up reply actions
The salted caramels are delicious.
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 3:10 PM PDT up reply actions
Quite. I tried some of the stuff he’s trying out for the future last night. It’s all damn good.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 3:11 PM PDT up reply actions
The weird thing is I see those at my local butcher shop.
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 3:19 PM PDT up reply actions
Nice! He’s pretty much just starting out, so his chocolate’s basically anywhere that will take it. It’s going really well, though.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 3:35 PM PDT up reply actions
I have some of those. They are poorly designed as bandages.
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 3:06 PM PDT up reply actions
News that is Not Bad
extrabaggs Andrew Baggarly
Good news on Sergio Romo. Further tests showed no additional issues with his elbow. Bochy very confident he’ll be ready when eligible Aug.25
1 minute ago
[made-up Twitter cite] Jeremy Affeldt unavailable after joining the Moon Calf Collective, giving up all possessions.
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 3:00 PM PDT up reply actions
Not to bring up a sore subject here…
I have Croix de Candlesticks older than you.
goldengatebeerbars.com
by troymccluresf on Aug 17, 2011 3:15 PM PDT up reply actions
I just filed for the morning newscast, and in four minutes, I’m done. Next stop: Oakland. I’m flying out on Friday. What great sport!
TheLetter2: East Coast Boogaloo
Woo hoo!
2010 World Series Champions!
Adopted 'nephew' to the ever avuncular and always awesome Jon Miller
by Johnny Disaster on Aug 17, 2011 6:47 PM PDT up reply actions
you think we want to watch todays game?
Proud papa to: Bill Schlough, Senior Vice President and Chief Information Officer, aka the IT guy.
Your mom's a girl
Golden Dong
Even straight-laced friends and co-workers see the dong on the back of TGWTWSS hat. Tons of people still wear them to games.
rowand stance....
this post made me chuckle because he’s the 1 guy on the team my girlfriend remembers because of how erotic his stance looks
by Black&OjKoolaid on Aug 18, 2011 4:18 PM PDT reply actions
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