Bruce Bochy is dumb
by Natto on Sep 3, 2009 8:46 PM PDT
115 comments
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
...he thought a Cha Cha Bowl was a new dance.
...he tripped over the cordless bullpen phone
...he tried to eat a bat donut.
...he thought eye black was a new Apple music player.
...when driving to Mays Field, he saw the sign "Ballpark left" and went home.
...he got lost in the dugout and couldn't get out.
...he called for a pitching change on the ceremonial first pitch.
...he thought Barry Bonds was a certificate for fruit.
...HE LEAVES ONE OF THE TOP HITTING PROSPECTS IN ALL OF BASEBALL ON THE BENCH FOR AN ENTIRE SERIES.
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…he still thinks Bengie Molina is a cleanup hitter.
Clayton Tanner. I have nothing witty to add.
by walkoff baltimore chop on Sep 3, 2009 9:00 PM PDT reply actions
oh
… he tripped over Buster’s cordless phone
Tommy Joseph is the Dingerzball Wizard
by SoFa King Mike on Sep 3, 2009 9:03 PM PDT up reply actions
Argh 2MB to download in this comment…
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…when someone told him Larry Baer was there to see him he immediately flopped to the floor and played dead.
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Grass is green
Giant Dirtbags: John Bowker, Steve Hammond. MIA List: Todd Jennings, Brian Anderson
Jeremy Affeldt induces DP's
by Giant among Angels on Sep 3, 2009 9:33 PM PDT reply actions
Water is wet.
Clayton Tanner. I have nothing witty to add.
by walkoff baltimore chop on Sep 3, 2009 9:35 PM PDT up reply actions
Bruce Bochy is so dumb
That I cant even think of something clever to say
Chris Dominguez: Bringing dingerz back to The Bay (In a while)
SCIENCE
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…he thought Willy May’s basket catch was made at a picnic.
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
-1 for “May’s” and not “Mays”
THATS HOW DUMB I AM
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
That’s pretty bad, no way around it. I do like the joke though.
Proud father of Juan Carlos Perez. Think Albert Pujols at a position to be determined.
@#$% Juan Uribe. Dios es grande.
M-A-Y-S
Maize
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
n’ Blue!!!!!! That might just be for me, but figured i’d throw it out there.
"Snow woulda had it!!!"
THANKS BRIAN SABEAN FOR LETTING MY GERALD GO!!!!!!!
Nope, not just you! 8-4 this year, guaranteed.
by helloooonoonan on Sep 4, 2009 9:36 PM PDT up reply actions
Grammar Police Imposter!
I think it would be Mays’ not Mays.
Young Studs for Old Bats: The Brian Sabean Story
FREE KEVIN FRANDSEN!!! Member of the Frandsen 5% Club.
by Uribe nee Gonzalez on Sep 4, 2009 12:03 AM PDT up reply actions
Well, if we want to get technical...
It’s “Mays’s”. The apostre-after-the-s rule only applies for plural words, e.g. “The Giants’ bats are silent.”
Correct.
And nice handle.
Joe Martinez: You are cool.
When it's all said and done, America will be remembered for three things: The Bill of Rights, jazz, and baseball.
Thought it was Carlos and Lee's brother
Willie Mays
Why couldn't McCovey have hit the ball just three feet higher??
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…when Ron Wotus asked him if he wanted to try a bunt he said “no, i’m thinking of having the pie instead.”
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…when Rags suggested he warm up some relievers, Bochy microwaved some Ex-Lax.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
…he reported Randy Winn to the police for stealing second base.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
…he brought a stake and wore a garlic clove necklace before meeting with the umpires.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
Sanchez had a no-no only because Bochy had diarrhea which cause him to be stuck on the pooper, so he could’nt take him out…
Sounds more like a butt pee problem, than an intelligence problem
Tommy Joseph is the Dingerzball Wizard
by SoFa King Mike on Sep 4, 2009 12:52 PM PDT up reply actions
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
when the scoreboard flashed HOME RUN after Velez’s first inning round tripper he actually ran home.
Jesse Foppert: I Still Believe. Maybe a little less now.
"I've come to the conclusion that the two most important things in life are good friends and a good bullpen." ~Bob Lemon,
by AndYourBirdCanSing on Sep 3, 2009 10:29 PM PDT reply actions
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…when Lon Simmons said “tell it good-bye” he climbed into the stands, grabbed the ball from the fan who caught, and whispered to it “farewell, my friend, farewell.”
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
… he got sued for sexual harassment for putting on the squeeze play.
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
My Ode to you, my brother.
“Changes” — jct “2pac” gamer
Come on come on
I see no changes wake up in the morning and I ask myself
is this game worth watching should I blast myself?
I’m tired of watching Rowand & even worse Molina
my head hurts so I’m lookin’ for a wall to punch
Sabes give a damn about K-Fran? No
Play Velez hit a HR he’s a hero
Give the chance to matt downs who the hell cares
one less chatty mouth on the roster? Yeah.
First throw ‘em curve & fast ball on the corner
give ’em sliders down and in watch ’em swing through another
I got my swing back that’s what Randy said
2 sliders in the dirt now the rally’s dead
I got love for my Giants but we can never go nowhere
unless we hits a few homers
We gotta start makin’ changes
learn to see some pitches instead of first pitch swinging
and that’s how it’s supposed to be
How can Pedro shut us down if he’s close to 40?
I’d love to go back to when we scored some runs
but things changed, and that’s the way it is
[Bridge w/ changing ad libs]
Come on come on
That’s just the way it is
Things’ll never be the same
That’s just the way it is
aww yeah
[Repeat]
2
I see no changes all I see is veteran faces
misplaced Nate makes disgrace to bases
We under I wonder what it takes to make this
one better lineup, let’s erase the wasted
Take Molina out the lineup they’ll be acting right
‘cause both black and white is hacking at slop tonight
and only time we win is when we blank the other
it takes skill to be winners, time for Cain to lose each other
And although it seems heaven sent
We ain’t ready, to see a catcher that’s competent, uhh
It ain’t a secret don’t conceal the fact
Buster Posey’s real, and Molina’s wacked
But some things will never change
try to take freaking walk but then you’re benched like K-Fred
Now tell me what’s a Bowker to do
Drawing walks don’t appeal to the Dunston in you
You gotta operate the easy way
“I pinch hit a bomb today” But you hit it in a sleazy way
Swinging at 58% of pitches? " I gotta get paid,"
Well hey, well that’s the way it is
[Bridge]
[Talking:]
We gotta make a change…
It’s time for us as a team to start makin’ some changes.
Let’s change the catcher to Posey, let’s change the RF to Schierholtz
and let’s change the way the lineup is put together.
You see the old way wasn’t working so it’s on us to do
what we gotta do, to survive.
3
And still I see no changes can’t a Giants fan get a little peace
It’s man on second base & no outs and you say Rowand PLEASE
Instead of moving the runner over he pops out to LF
No sacrifice this year? Are you fucking real?
And I ain’t never missed a game I ain’t have to
But now I’m back with the facts givin’ it back to you
Don’t let’em jack you up, back you up,
crack you up and pimp smack you up
You gotta learn to take a walk
they get jealous when they see ya with ya OPS+
But tell Dunston he can’t touch this
I don’t trust this when they try to rush I bust this
That’s the sound of my tool you say it ain’t cool
cheating the game walking? I ain’t no fool
And as long as I get at bats I gotta swing and hack
& I never get to lay back
but I never got to worry ‘bout the pay checks
5 year 60M deal that I signed way back
comin’ back after all these years
hack hack hack hack hack that’s the way it is uhh
[Bridge ’til fade:]
Some things will never change
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
… after Sabes told him he was “kicking some tires”, Bochy gave him a pair of steel toe boots.
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
when asked about Edgar Renteria’s grand slam he replied, “I thought that they only served that at Denny’s?”
Jesse Foppert: I Still Believe. Maybe a little less now.
"I've come to the conclusion that the two most important things in life are good friends and a good bullpen." ~Bob Lemon,
by AndYourBirdCanSing on Sep 3, 2009 10:55 PM PDT reply actions
… he believes having a player named Winn in the lineup guarantees victory.
by Every6thDay on Sep 3, 2009 11:00 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
He thinks that Bengie is going to be better than ever because he came into this season More Leaner.
Context, people. More context is good. Less context is bad. If you're willing to be reductive, then you're willing to be wrong.
by howtheyscored on Sep 4, 2009 1:06 AM PDT up reply actions
I don’t like what I’ve been hearing from him the past couple days. He makes it sound like he has no intention to play Posey, and that he’s only up here in case of an emergency.
Wall-E for Best Picture 2008
2009: The return of Los Galacticos!
Yep.
Sometimes I think these guys take out their brains and play with them.
Maybe he's been told by upper mgmt that there is a "hands off" policy in effect here.
Idiotic as it may seem , maybe Posey is here just to catch the action – but not the baseball. And maybe Bruce wants to use him but isn’t allowed to.
NL West TempestTeapot
Nothing matters , and what if it did?
by victor frankenstein on Sep 4, 2009 12:29 AM PDT up reply actions
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
he had ownership hire a rodeo clown for the bullpen.
Status: Feels so broke up. Wants to go home. || Still boycotting Johnsonville and Giants souvenirs or ballpark foods for repossessing my K Wall in right field.
idiot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
what guy in like the 6th inning. guy on 2nd, no outs, rentadouch up, doesnt bunt him over for pablo and a nice 1 run lead!!! 1 run is huge when u got the fricken CY YOUNG award winner pitching! i dont get wats going on in his mind everyyy single time!!!
Pablo has only 4 Sacrifice Flies and 0 Sacrfice Hits in 2009.
He’s too ill-disciplined to count on for a SF. You can only let him hack whilst you cross your fingers,\.
I didn’t have a problem with that, because it’s not that late in the game and Renteria has been clutch. I like that he was aggressive there. That being said, a veteran player like Renteria should be ashamed of himself for pulling the first pitch and hitting a ground ball to short. You’ve got to go to right field until you have two strikes on you. Totally unprofessional at bat.
proud father of Edgar (Grandslam) Renteria
Edgar intended to go to RF (look at how his feet were positioned), but he guessed wrong on the pitch and the ball moved away instead of in. He was fooled by Pedro’s pitching motion.
Yep, that’s Giants hitters for you. Guessing at the first pitch, instead of waiting for the one they can do something with.
by Missing Barry on Sep 4, 2009 12:10 PM PDT up reply actions
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…when Matt Cain went up for a sacrifice he gave him a goat and a knife.
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
he avoids cops because he heard that people get arrested for Hit and Run
Status: Feels so broke up. Wants to go home. || Still boycotting Johnsonville and Giants souvenirs or ballpark foods for repossessing my K Wall in right field.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
he double switched in an American League game.
Status: Feels so broke up. Wants to go home. || Still boycotting Johnsonville and Giants souvenirs or ballpark foods for repossessing my K Wall in right field.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
When he heard it was time for a double switch, he went to Ikea to get a switchplate.
"Snow woulda had it!!!"
THANKS BRIAN SABEAN FOR LETTING MY GERALD GO!!!!!!!
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…when Roger Craig said to him “Humm Baby”, he asked “what song, darlin’?”
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
… he put home plate in a dishwasher to clean it.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…he wore two hats at once during a double header.
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…he double switched the basement light and promptly tumbled down the stairs in darkness.
I still believe in Bowkermania.
by rightcenterfielder on Sep 3, 2009 11:56 PM PDT reply actions
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
… when he noticed the bases were drunk he made a pot of coffee.
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
….he got Fred Lewis a pair of aviator goggles for flying around the bases.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
… he spent two hours at Home Depot looking for the pine meat.
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
… he hired a maid for his clean-up hitter.
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Many Giants died to bring you this message
"I never watched baseball on TV. It's slow and boring. I'm not a fan. Never was." - Jeff Kent
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…he alerted the military when he found out that Pablo was on base.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…he threw away Zito’s guitar because there was a hole in it.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…he thought the ACME Chophouse was where Wile E. Coyote got all his silverware.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
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I like this one.
Status: Feels so broke up. Wants to go home. || Still boycotting Johnsonville and Giants souvenirs or ballpark foods for repossessing my K Wall in right field.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
… he had Nate Schierholtz sent to Iraq when he heard he had a cannon for an arm.
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…he put on the “tools of ignorance” and gained 50 IQ points.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
… he thinks a “magic number” is a song to summon a genie.
Brian Sabean strongly encourages you to disregard the drudgery of your employment responsibilities and join him in the consumption of spirituous libations.
The Night Natto Went Crazy Again
Context, people. More context is good. Less context is bad. If you're willing to be reductive, then you're willing to be wrong.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
that when he was asked if the Giants should consider bringing Buster Posey up for a cup of coffee he responded, “Sure, do you know any good places?”
Jesse Foppert: I Still Believe. Maybe a little less now.
"I've come to the conclusion that the two most important things in life are good friends and a good bullpen." ~Bob Lemon,
by AndYourBirdCanSing on Sep 4, 2009 9:17 AM PDT reply actions
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…he only accpeted the job because he was told he’d be working at Mays Field and was excited because his parents took him to the one in Tracy every Halloween.
…he called Sabean a “sissy boy” after hearing he’d picked a Posey
…when he was introduced to Dave Groeschner and told he was the trainer, he asked if he could teach his dog to stop crapping in the house
…when asked about the Giants broadcasters, he said “fishing is a man’s sport”
…he thinks a “splash hit” is when he’s able to take a dump without missing the toilet
"We're in this thing!" My adopted Giant: "Raptor Jesus" Guzman, "Sweet Jesus" Guzman and Jesus H. Guzman.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…he only plays Brian Wilson because he’s hoping to get the first copy of his latest single.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
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…he wouldn’t let his kids talk to Bill Neukom because he doesn’t approve of violent video games.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
Wait, you mean “Grant” isn’t a screen name for Big Mac?
That’s it, I’m outta here.
Meet my new son: Sundrendy Windster, on the Curacao-SF express (via Arizona).
…he thinks Billy Mays’ death was the saddest day in Giants history.
"We're in this thing!" My adopted Giant: "Raptor Jesus" Guzman, "Sweet Jesus" Guzman and Jesus H. Guzman.
Not enough dick jokes.
Context, people. More context is good. Less context is bad. If you're willing to be reductive, then you're willing to be wrong.
by howtheyscored on Sep 4, 2009 11:33 AM PDT up reply actions
…he spent an hour talking to Willie Mays before he realized that it was his statue.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
… he went to Chevy’s and tried to order the Silverado.
Context, people. More context is good. Less context is bad. If you're willing to be reductive, then you're willing to be wrong.
…he went to Brian Sabean and tried to order a Sierra
I R 5
by say hey nation on Sep 4, 2009 11:47 AM PDT up reply actions
… he put a Kung Fu Panda DVD as a defensive sub at third base.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
…he asked Uribe to wear #1 on his uniform so he could remember his name is “Juan”
"We're in this thing!" My adopted Giant: "Raptor Jesus" Guzman, "Sweet Jesus" Guzman and Jesus H. Guzman.
…he thinks a foul pole is a personal hygiene issue
"We're in this thing!" My adopted Giant: "Raptor Jesus" Guzman, "Sweet Jesus" Guzman and Jesus H. Guzman.
Howie, ya happy now?
"We're in this thing!" My adopted Giant: "Raptor Jesus" Guzman, "Sweet Jesus" Guzman and Jesus H. Guzman.
Couldn’t be happier.
Context, people. More context is good. Less context is bad. If you're willing to be reductive, then you're willing to be wrong.
by howtheyscored on Sep 5, 2009 11:10 AM PDT up reply actions
Your happiness is my business
TWTHS
(That’s What The Hooker Said)
"We're in this thing!" My adopted Giant: "Raptor Jesus" Guzman, "Sweet Jesus" Guzman and Jesus H. Guzman.
…he threw out his Naughty by Nature records when he found out they were down with OBP.
"If you want to walk, watch a mailman."--Shawon Dunston
"If you want to bunt, bake a cake."--Bruce Bochy
by Kitspool on Sep 4, 2009 1:17 PM PDT reply actions 1 recs
…he thinks “plate discipline” means saying “no thanks” when you’re offered seconds on mashed potatoes.
Meet my new son: Sundrendy Windster, on the Curacao-SF express (via Arizona).
…he thinks a beat writer is a hip hop producer.
"Trust me: If I’m feeling lousy at the plate like that, I’m not just going to walk up there with bases loaded and get a hit because I’m some great clutch hitter." - Mr. F!
comics | art | Nattowear | Unofficial McImage Directory
Bruse Bochy is so dumb...
…he went to the Giants Dugout Store and was disappointed to learn they didn’t sell dugouts
"We're in this thing!" My adopted Giant: "Raptor Jesus" Guzman, "Sweet Jesus" Guzman and Jesus H. Guzman.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb...
…when he first met Jon Miller he asked him for golf tips
"We're in this thing!" My adopted Giant: "Raptor Jesus" Guzman, "Sweet Jesus" Guzman and Jesus H. Guzman.
Bruce Bochy is so dumb....
…. when Sabean told him to makeup his mind, he put lipstick on his fat forehead.
/crickets
Aaron King is still my homeboy... iffy mechanics and all
McFAQ for all you newcomers out there.
GET THAT VORP AND WHIP SH!T OUTTA HERE!!!
Bruce Bochy is so dumb....
…he spent an entire afternoon looking for the keys to the batter’s box.
Neal before Zod!
Official Sponsor of the 1997 San Francisco Giants
by nostocksjustbonds on Sep 4, 2009 7:08 PM PDT reply actions
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