How one Angels writer sees the Giants

(That writer being me.)

I do these at the start of an Angels series, and feedback is always nice, since you know more about your guys than I do and because you -- yes, you -- are very funny.

over 2 years ago Sam Miller OCR 53 comments 5 recs |

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Hahahaha…. but he actually did manage to pull a Double Switch in an AL game last year. D:

Matt Cain: He'll save children, but not the Dodger children.
PABLO SANDOVAL AM STEAL DEATH, DESTROYER OF WORLDS.

by jponry on Jun 15, 2009 8:50 AM PDT reply actions

now that I've come back and realized it was more than one page long...

the whole thing was great! And I love you for giving Romo some props, because ♥Romo♥

Matt Cain: He'll save children, but not the Dodger children.
PABLO SANDOVAL AM STEAL DEATH, DESTROYER OF WORLDS.

by jponry on Jun 15, 2009 10:02 AM PDT up reply actions

didn’t he do it in seattle just last month, too?

by FPTV on Jun 15, 2009 11:34 AM PDT up reply actions

sort of ish kind of

but it was 2 position players, so it wasn’t as bad.

Sharlon Schoop - de favoriete Nederlandse honkbalspeler van McCovey Chronicles.
You always have to be one step ahead of your drunk friends
--Daisy Owl

by Viliphied on Jun 15, 2009 12:54 PM PDT up reply actions

good original work, I think Grant needs a kick back of your salary this week

Minor White > Ansel Adams

by say hey nation on Jun 15, 2009 8:50 AM PDT reply actions

Given that Grant is one of my biggest baseball writing influences, he should get a kickback of my salary every week. For reals.

Saving countless runs with my defense.

by Sam Miller OCR on Jun 15, 2009 9:02 AM PDT up reply actions

"For reals."

Grant would never write that. Go back for more influence.

Disfrute Los Gigantes every day at www.leftymalo.com

by leftymalo on Jun 15, 2009 11:42 AM PDT up reply actions

With certainty?

Saving countless runs with my defense.

by Sam Miller OCR on Jun 15, 2009 11:53 AM PDT up reply actions

Fo’ real, dough.

by Bay Area Sports Guy on Jun 15, 2009 2:35 PM PDT up reply actions

http://www.mccoveychronicles.com/2007/10/8/103447/244

by Grant Brisbee on Jun 17, 2009 9:18 PM PDT up reply actions

funny

by Mrbasepaul on Jun 18, 2009 9:58 AM PDT up reply actions

I can’t believe it. It’s like the moment my parents told me Elvis Presley took drugs.

Disfrute Los Gigantes every day at www.leftymalo.com

by leftymalo on Jul 1, 2009 3:42 PM PDT up reply actions

/stamped approved

spreading the “Fat Ichiro” nickname is doing the lord’s work.

Randy Winn is going to catch that. And he'll do it real classy-like too.

by oldjacket on Jun 15, 2009 9:28 AM PDT reply actions 1 recs

This.

by Bay Area Sports Guy on Jun 15, 2009 2:35 PM PDT up reply actions

panda makes positive contact

by druncan on Jun 15, 2009 9:33 AM PDT reply actions

deltron 4848

"Why couldn't McCovey have hit the ball just three feet higher?" / Adopted brother of the AnVil

by SoFa King Mike on Jun 15, 2009 12:44 PM PDT up reply actions

I’m just impressed by all the Sabermetrics in a mainstream news source. And yes, I like all the commentary too…

I agree with oldjacket, I approve.

Proud father of Barry Zito. As long as he keeps throwing strikes, that is.

by MonkeyChow on Jun 15, 2009 9:40 AM PDT reply actions

LOL: ‘Headsize Over Replacement Skipper….’

Proud supporter of the Fightin' Hydrants.

by Little Napoleon on Jun 15, 2009 9:59 AM PDT reply actions

Great Stuff Dude

Really funny. One thing you might not know about Panda is that he’s fast … 3.85 seconds to first base (from the left side).

I’d say you pretty much nailed it — this team is a bunch of overachievers trying to figure out if they’re just hot or legitimate contenders.

by Change Up on Jun 15, 2009 10:26 AM PDT reply actions

Thumbs up.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that pie > cake, that Bochy is endowed by his creator with certain undeniable traits, that among these are veteran man-love, a gigantic skull, and the pursuit of the double switch.
Adopted Giant: Fred Lewis, who can still draw a walk.

by jcb9 on Jun 15, 2009 10:34 AM PDT reply actions

Very Funny

But I can’t believe you left out Fred Lewis – there’s a gold mine of potential comedic thoughts.

"There ain’t much to being a ballplayer, if you’re a ballplayer." - Honus Wagner

by Fla-Giant on Jun 15, 2009 10:50 AM PDT reply actions

awesome… I had no idea Winn had such horrible numbers against lefties.

Psycho killer, qu'est-ce que c'est?

by shikantaza on Jun 15, 2009 10:51 AM PDT reply actions

I have to say, I’m not a fan of the Fat Ichiro nickname. I really don’t like it at all. I do like Kung Fu Panda though.

by Missing Barry on Jun 15, 2009 11:02 AM PDT reply actions

How about skinny gwynn

by superk1ng on Jun 15, 2009 11:08 AM PDT up reply actions 1 recs

I laughed

by jctGamer on Jun 15, 2009 11:04 PM PDT up reply actions

LOL

"One percent of ballplayers are leaders of men. The other ninety-nine percent are followers of women."-John McGraw, NY Giants Baseball Club

My adopted son Matt Downs . Ranked as the 24th best prospect in the Giants farm system by Baseball America !!

by nvsfg on Jun 19, 2009 7:16 AM PDT up reply actions

Skinny Gwynn would be Tony Gwynn, Jr. He’s rather small.

by SFGuy on Jun 22, 2009 3:20 AM PDT up reply actions

I guess we have to fight now.

Randy Winn is going to catch that. And he'll do it real classy-like too.

by oldjacket on Jun 15, 2009 12:19 PM PDT up reply actions

FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!

Minor White > Ansel Adams

by say hey nation on Jun 15, 2009 12:26 PM PDT up reply actions

Fantastic

Very funny and accurate, a tough combo to pull off. My favorite parts were the Bochy caption and the Wilson blurb about going to a full count in 30% of his ABs. Everyone who watches him intrinsically knows this, but I don’t know if anyone was aware of the actual percentage and the league average number (I wasn’t). Frightening.

Proud father of Juan Carlos Perez. Think Albert Pujols at second.

by marcello on Jun 15, 2009 11:05 AM PDT reply actions

Romo > Wilson

Psycho killer, qu'est-ce que c'est?

by shikantaza on Jun 15, 2009 11:19 AM PDT up reply actions

I was talking about Wilson’s full count tendencies in the comments section of BCB a couple of weeks ago.

IF ONLY YOU CARED MARCELLO

Bay City Ball

by xanthan on Jun 16, 2009 6:36 AM PDT up reply actions

God only knows what he’d do without a 100 mph fastball

not freak anyone out by pitching in the 9th

by ktice on Jun 17, 2009 11:46 PM PDT up reply actions

Top Drawer!

"Don't trust anyone under the age of 30" - Brian Sabean

by Smotheredinhugs on Jun 15, 2009 12:28 PM PDT reply actions

wow

I surprised they let you post from “Behind The Orange Curtain”.

Still, writing for Pravda must be a pretty good gig.

FIRE BRIAN SABEAN... UNLESS HE KEEPS DRAFTING WELL. .. AND SIGNS UNDERRATED PLAYERS LIKE AFFELDT OR PHELPS. .. OR ALRIGHT WHO'S PLAYING WITH THE ALIEN MIND-SWITCHING RAY?
-------
PARPG- Indy post-apocalyptic roleplaying game currently in early planning stages.

by zenbitz on Jun 15, 2009 12:38 PM PDT reply actions

I enjoyed that.

GROUGTHINK ALERT
Chatterbalks dot com: Still with jokes. Now with updates.

by groug on Jun 15, 2009 1:57 PM PDT reply actions

Good stuff

and from a MCC-friendly perspective. All it needed was a “Matt Cain, 9-1 and 3rd starter at best” reference.

"Are we bad? No. But right now, we are." Boulderskull, 4.16.09

by Kitspool on Jun 15, 2009 2:27 PM PDT reply actions

Enjoyed it as well, and dug the respect for the broadcast team.

Could have used a little more snark, but I’m not complaining.

"The dreams ain't broken down here now, they're walking with a limp" --TW

by bgunn on Jun 15, 2009 3:34 PM PDT reply actions

I'm just impressed ...

that an outsider has successfully navigated all the dangerous sarchasms and snarky waters around these parts. I sent my buddy to this site and he came back distraught about the “perceived values” of the Giants players.

LinceCain and pray for rain .... or for someone to take Zito off our hands.

by Lincecain on Jun 15, 2009 4:47 PM PDT reply actions

As everyone else has said:

Nice job. Good combo of humor and playing it straight with some nice research thrown in. And thanks for giving a shout-out to the announcers, who are the best in the biz and make others around the sport sound laaauuughhhable.

by Uribe nee Gonzalez on Jun 15, 2009 6:16 PM PDT reply actions

I enjoyed it

Giant Dirtbags: John Bowker, Steve Hammond. MIA List: Todd Jennings, Brian Anderson
Wronghanded Affeldt pitches right

by Giant among Angels on Jun 15, 2009 10:33 PM PDT reply actions

OC Register Top Story!!!

Perfect Attendance Record

Mischievously implosive purple pitching staff.

by SloIsLonelyForTheOrange on Jun 16, 2009 1:37 AM PDT reply actions

Great stuff

appreciate the props for Miller too. Though I think most here would say he’s better than Scully. Unless you’re talking about his Scully impersonation…

by moonman on Jun 16, 2009 9:00 AM PDT reply actions

Nah. Most wouldn’t. Scully is the only thing not evil about the dodgers, and it takes a lot to reach that status.

Prospective parent of new pick, Zack Wheeler. Projectable Righty stolen from the braves. Of course, I stalk my son's myspace: http://www.myspace.com/zackwheelerbaseball

"Obviously I’m not doing things like going toe-to-toe with a ninja. Find me a ninja, for one."--Brian Wilson

by haverecords on Jun 16, 2009 12:44 PM PDT up reply actions

Actually I don’t really mean to speak for anyone else. Rarely a good idea…

by moonman on Jun 16, 2009 12:55 PM PDT up reply actions

I don't like Scully

Hell, I don’t even like Jackie Robinson. Yeah, I said it.

by Missing Barry on Jun 16, 2009 8:11 PM PDT up reply actions

Cool stuff

BTW, did you write that piece that blasted the ANGLES BRASS!!!11 for sending down Jose Arredondo?

Aaron King is still my homeboy... iffy mechanics and all

If Dustin Pedroia played in Seattle, not many people would be talking about him.

by baetown415 on Jun 16, 2009 10:30 PM PDT reply actions

I did!

Saving countless runs with my defense.

by Sam Miller OCR on Jun 17, 2009 12:43 PM PDT up reply actions

Good work, man.

emperor nobody: "can ben copeland play third will the mcgwire throwback jersey be sponsored by balco labs i think i am having non-nerve-damage related chest pains well there’s holliday’s homer for may"
Clayton Tanner. I have nothing witty to add.

by walkoff baltimore chop on Jun 17, 2009 11:58 AM PDT reply actions