I know Charlie don't surf, but Barry?

by TheBigLeBowker on Aug 9, 2008 11:28 PM PDT Comment 26 comments

A topic that, as far as I know, which isn't much obviously, raised some interest last year while Zito was 'struggling' heh heh heh...clear the throat. Are the SF brass allowing Barry Zito to surf again? Byrnes is on the D.L., and I'm sure a lot of you are hoping that Zito has the same fate, so is Barry allowed to surf?

Short of allowing that SOB to take his pilgrimage to Mecca, do any of you know if the G-Men have allowed Barry any slack in his extrahippicular activities to allow him to surf again.?

I just saw shark week on Discoverey, and now I know Great Whites in the Pacific northwest will breach waters for a tasty meal, but I still pose the question...

Due to the fact that we have a total loss (Farmers Insurance confirmed) on our hands, will we allow this hippie every freedom he can have in the hopes that Jaws can free us from this contract? Is there a shark clause that I am unaware of?

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I don’t think he’s been allowed to surf at all.

My Dave Righetti is better than your Dave Righetti.

by howtheyscored on Aug 10, 2008 12:32 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

I don't know

but what if a shark bites off his pitching arm, and they have to replace it with a robotic arm? We would have a bionic Barry Zito. His arm designed and constructed by the worlds greatest scientists to hurl a baseball at blinding speeds …How fast you ask? A humanly unhittable eighty ONE miles per hour.

by boonitez on Aug 10, 2008 1:59 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

They have the technology, they can rebuild him… the 126 million dollar man.

I’m sure that joke has been made before, but it was worth making again to note that I had no idea that The Bionic Woman and The 6 Million Dollar Man take place in the same universe, and that the former began as an episode of the latter. Not until just now, when I looked it up.

My Dave Righetti is better than your Dave Righetti.

by howtheyscored on Aug 10, 2008 3:02 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

lol doing research for posts

Trent Kline: Decentish. Also, my website is called ChatterBalks Dot Com and on it I make jokes about things.

by groug on Aug 10, 2008 5:43 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Shark attacks are very rare.

You’d be better off sending him to Yosemite and hope that he would be struck by lightning.

-- Born Yesterday

by thatdog on Aug 10, 2008 7:16 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Or a bear. Don't rule out bears. A bear could be useful here.

I'm adopting a true Giant and an awe-inspring gamer: tk. "Atta babe."

by Mayor of 311 on Aug 10, 2008 8:35 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

slight problem though

they say it’s kind of harder to surf in forests than it is in water.

by boonitez on Aug 10, 2008 10:24 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Send him to Jellystone and maybe a bear will mistake him for a pick-a-nick basket.

Fred Lewis can stand under my umbrella.

by S.F. Giangst on Aug 10, 2008 12:00 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Clarification

As a college surf bum, I definitely was on board with the let Barry surf movement earlier this year. However, I forgot who pointed it out, but HE IS ALLOWED TO SURF.

However, if he gets hurt while in the act of surfing, he gets no monies. Would you be willing to risk that? As much as I love surfing, it’s not worth 126 M to me. Guess it isn’t to Barry Zito either.

Angel Villalona: Rush Fan? Probably.

by AngelintheInfield on Aug 10, 2008 10:36 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

thank you, I’m quite surprised that they’ll allow him to

Littered campgrounds, folding chairs. Feed Doritos to the bears.

by TheBigLeBowker on Aug 10, 2008 10:43 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

The real question LeBowker.. is will they let him smoke weed with many of the bullpen arms?

proud father of the newly acquired Brandon Crawford..

by Azmanz on Aug 10, 2008 11:17 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

many meaning? Oh yeah 5

Littered campgrounds, folding chairs. Feed Doritos to the bears.

by TheBigLeBowker on Aug 10, 2008 11:22 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

he probably gets it for them man, he’s the team hippie

Littered campgrounds, folding chairs. Feed Doritos to the bears.

by TheBigLeBowker on Aug 10, 2008 11:22 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

They need the Whizzinator to beat the pee test.

"While conservatives tell you 'leave things alone and no one will lose,' and liberals tell you 'interfere a lot and no one will lose,' baseball says 'someone will lose.' Not only says it - but insists upon it! ... Democracy is lovely, but baseball's more mature." BVCE supports SF Dugout and Manny Burriss.

by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Aug 10, 2008 11:22 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Daunte Culpepper used a white one

Littered campgrounds, folding chairs. Feed Doritos to the bears.

by TheBigLeBowker on Aug 10, 2008 11:25 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Once again the work is done for me.

by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Aug 10, 2008 11:26 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

I don’t see how having Moises Alou on your side is going to help, but if you say so.

My Dave Righetti is better than your Dave Righetti.

by howtheyscored on Aug 10, 2008 11:49 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

I thought he was best known as Manos de Peepee.

by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Aug 10, 2008 11:53 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

He has a large number of urine inspired nicknames. He’s like the Dream of Endless of pee.

My Dave Righetti is better than your Dave Righetti.

by howtheyscored on Aug 10, 2008 12:03 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

It’s better than having Jesus on your side.

yeah, well, the whole world stinks, francine -- so get used to it!

by satyricrash on Aug 10, 2008 12:01 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

8 year olds dude

Littered campgrounds, folding chairs. Feed Doritos to the bears.

by TheBigLeBowker on Aug 10, 2008 12:03 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

You;re out of your element, Donnie

Billy Hayes: His job is better than yours.

by delorean on Aug 10, 2008 10:33 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

I Think We Should Keep The Ban

and Zito should surf anyway and get bit by a shark but not killed or long term injured but injured enough that he can’t pretend he was just washing his truck and we can thus use this contract violation to justify voiding his contract.

by giantsrainman on Aug 10, 2008 6:38 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

"Charlie don't surf"

When the Giants are once again seriously considerable (2011) I will celebrate 30 years of loving “Sandinista!”

Arizona thinks we're Washington which thinks we're Arizona.

by victor frankenstein on Aug 10, 2008 9:47 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Barry dont surf and we think he should
Barry dont surf and you know that it aint no good
Barry dont surf for his hamburger momma
Barry’s gonna be a napalm star

Everybody wants to rule the world
Must be something we get from birth
One truth is we never learn
Satellites will make space burn

Weve been told to keep the strangers out
We dont like them starting to hang around
We dont like them all over town
Across the world we are going to blow them down

The reign of the super powers must be over
So many armies cant free the earth
Soon the rock will roll over
Africa is choking on their coca cola

Its a one a way street in a one horse town
One way people starting to brag around
You can laugh, put them down
These one way people gonna blow us down

Barry dont surf he’ll never learn
Barry dont surf though hes got a gun
Barry dont surf think that he should
Barry dont surf we really think he should
Barry dont surf

Barry dont surf and we think he should
Barry dont surf and you know that it aint no good
Barry dont surf for his hamburger momma
Barry dont surf

by Lars The Wanderer on Aug 11, 2008 10:40 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs