The Mid-Afternoon 4-1-1!
by Grant Brisbee on Jul 30, 2008 1:51 PM PDT
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Print- Aussie Aussie Aussie, oy, oy, oy vey? – Talented temptress Lindsay Lohan is set to go into the studio with "It"-Aussie songwriter Sam Sparro. That’s not a drug-addled binge…this is a drug-addled binge! (pulls drug-addled binge from back of pants)
- Dumpsville for Grumpsville? – Tired of his gal pal’s insecurities, Simon Cowell has given her the old heave-ho! Based on his on-set persona, who here thinks he let her down easy? Not! I’d also bet that Randy Jackson just asked for her digits! "’Sup, dawg? I hear you’re single!" Something like that!
- She builds the hotels…he trashes them! – Renaissance woman Paris Hilton recently claimed that her boyfriend, edgy punker Benji Madden from the legendary band Good Charlotte, has helped her grow up. WOW! Talk about the blind leading the blind! Or, at least, the phony leading the entitled! Good Charlotte? More like good luck!
I’ll be back in an hour with more celeb gossip! Keep that mouse a-clickin’ and your love for gossip a-tickin’!
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Ooh Ooh me next.
Next on TMZ. Madonna is starting to look like a blonde version of Mona from “Whose the Boss?”. I think this could be an upgrade. Ha Ha Ha…..zinger!
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
by WilliamVanLandingham on Jul 30, 2008 1:57 PM PDT reply actions
what is the latest on Amy Winehouse
is she dead yet?
and, while we’re at it, who the hell is this Amy Winehouse I can’t stop hearing about?
by FluLikeSymptoms on Jul 30, 2008 1:58 PM PDT reply actions
Supposedly a very talented singer. I definitely can tell she’s laid down some heavy tracks. ZOOM ZOOM ZOOM!
Neglectful father of David Quinowski
She actually has some really good songs. She’s just a complete and total trainwreck that I’m sick of her.
"While conservatives tell you 'leave things alone and no one will lose,' and liberals tell you 'interfere a lot and no one will lose,' baseball says 'someone will lose.' Not only says it - but insists upon it! ... Democracy is lovely, but baseball's more mature." BVCE supports SF Dugout and Manny Burriss.
by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Jul 30, 2008 2:43 PM PDT up reply actions
And that every postpubescent slut wannabe adopted her "mascara by Nike"
Arizona thinks we're Washington which thinks we're Arizona.
by victor frankenstein on Jul 30, 2008 3:56 PM PDT up reply actions
Please never use the phrases “legendary band” and “edgy punker” in reference to Good Charlotte again.
Some things should just never be said. Even in jest.
Dude I heard that Stewart Copeland needs cortizone shots in his hands...
because he drums so freaking hard.
"ever so cynical yet whimsical giants related signature"
by The Gene Hackman on Jul 30, 2008 2:02 PM PDT reply actions
Usually we get Lohan’s OBP.
My Dave Righetti is better than your Dave Righetti.
by howtheyscored on Jul 30, 2008 2:17 PM PDT up reply actions
Anyone pick July 30 in the pool?
It was never a question if the Giants would drive Grant round the bend…only a question of when.
The All-Father is now a Giant!
Grant, you need to relax
Lucky for you another four-hour sweep of Ralph Barbieri rants is just 35 minutes away!!
No, my Crazy Crab bobblehead is not for sale.
Yesterday, he did a clipshow.
Really, he actually spent a bunch of time playing clips of himself from the last 3 days ranting about Time Lincecum.
My Dave Righetti is better than your Dave Righetti.
by howtheyscored on Jul 30, 2008 2:27 PM PDT up reply actions
Well, he probably thinks they were really insightful and clever rants.
Matt Cain: He'll save children, but not the Dodger children.
Favorite rant:
Trade Lincecum for Rios. And you have his Anaheim-Angels-loving, Coors swigging, Sleep Train (toot toot) mattress sleeping sidekick agreeing the whole time.
Adopted brother of the AnVil / GIANTSPACE™ returns!
by SoFa King Mike on Jul 30, 2008 2:33 PM PDT up reply actions
Time Lincecum? The god of time?
My Dave Righetti is better than your Dave Righetti.
by howtheyscored on Jul 30, 2008 2:31 PM PDT up reply actions
Yes it is
I also like Time Is On My Side by the Rolling Stones
...and the movie Fallen, which uses that song throughout.
Killer lines.
“Time can tear down a building
Or destroy a woman’s face.”
Arizona thinks we're Washington which thinks we're Arizona.
by victor frankenstein on Jul 30, 2008 4:04 PM PDT up reply actions
Wait...I have my "Times" confused.
Arizona thinks we're Washington which thinks we're Arizona.
by victor frankenstein on Jul 30, 2008 4:05 PM PDT up reply actions
Call it "The Ballad of Barry Bonds"
The rules have changed today
I have no place to stay
I’m thinking about the subway
My love has flown away
My tears have come and gone
Oh my Lord, I have to roam
I have no home!
I have no home .
Arizona thinks we're Washington which thinks we're Arizona.
by victor frankenstein on Jul 30, 2008 4:02 PM PDT up reply actions
put it in the skillet and
COOK IT! COOK IT!
"ever so cynical yet whimsical giants related signature"
by The Gene Hackman on Jul 30, 2008 2:41 PM PDT up reply actions
Jerk OUT!
“Tell me something I don’t ALREADY know…”
Arizona thinks we're Washington which thinks we're Arizona.
by victor frankenstein on Jul 30, 2008 4:09 PM PDT up reply actions
This post rules
Matt Cain: throwing complete game shutouts since 06'. No big deal.
by cain1rstballothof on Jul 30, 2008 3:59 PM PDT reply actions
Jesus
I used to write this stuff for the Examiner. Seriously. 90 percent of the google matches for my full name are trashy gossip pieces like this one (sorry Grant)—this definitely took me back. I would have to remind myself to “Insert snark here” and one time it almost got in the paper.
Notgardo, I still love you -- but you're grounded. No Guitar Hero for a month, no Cheez-Its for two months, and NO BASEBALL! This hurts me as much as it hurts you.
Hot off the press
The Mrs just informed me today that Salma Hayek has split with her baby daddy. What I’m saying is… I still have a shot! Probable? Hell no. Possible? No, not really.
3rd best freak out following an undeserved Matt Cain loss. At best.
Don't think, it could only hurt the ballclub.
In stark contrast to my triangle.
My Dave Righetti is better than your Dave Righetti.
by howtheyscored on Aug 1, 2008 2:50 AM PDT up reply actions
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