Lincecum to miss next start
by bleacherman on Jun 10, 2008 8:43 PM PDT
60 comments
Hot off the satire griddle:
San Francisco Giants phenom Tim Lincecum has left the team and will miss his next scheduled start, it was announced Tuesday.
The emerging ace was expected to take the mound Wednesday against Colorado. However, a Giants spokesman says Lincecum was offered, and has accepted, the role of Cameron in the upcoming sequel to Ferris Bueller's Day Off. The movie will be shot in Chicago over the coming months, and is scheduled to hit the big screen early in the summer of 2009.
Read the rest:
Tim Lincecum To Miss Next Start, Star in Ferris Bueller Sequel [Bleacher Report]
This FanPost is reader-generated, and it does not necessarily reflect the views of McCovey Chronicles. If the author uses filler to achieve the minimum word requirement, a moderator may edit the FanPost for his or her own amusement.
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let it be known, i accidentally read the second paragraph before the first, and it scared the living daylights out of me.
Idolizing Robb Nen since 2002...
by Smoke on the Water on Jun 10, 2008 8:45 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
yeah i was like, he wont pitch till 09? wtf mate
proud father of the newly acquired Brandon Crawford..
by Azmanz on Jun 10, 2008 8:49 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
dont ever do that to me again
the title of this thread is quite possibly the scariest sentence i have ever read.
My heart literally skipped a beat.
Someone get Damon Minor's agent on the phone stat!
by fanofvanlandingham on Jun 10, 2008 9:01 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Think of this team without Tim
The Nats would pity us
by Moggeee on Jun 10, 2008 9:03 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
I don’t know how clever it was. the Cameon/Tim thing has been pretty well played out
2008 Giants: A steaming pile of scrap!
by Goofus on Jun 10, 2008 9:14 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Oh Christ on a cracker I was ready to get in the car and drive it into the nearest light post.
I guess this is what I get for posting the “Bonds on the DL” post last year when Nik Bonds tore up his ankle playing b-ball.
"While conservatives tell you 'leave things alone and no one will lose,' and liberals tell you 'interfere a lot and no one will lose,' baseball says 'someone will lose.' Not only says it - but insists upon it! ... Democracy is lovely, but baseball's more mature." BVCE supports SF Dugout and Manny Burriss.
by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Jun 10, 2008 9:04 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
God I almost had a heart attack. Never do this again. Or at least can we agree to have some sort of indication in the title that this is satire. THAT WAS BUUUUUSH!
by Nellieball on Jun 10, 2008 9:07 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
I too was worried.
If you like things that are funny, perhaps you will enjoy ChatterBalks Dot Com?
by groug on Jun 10, 2008 9:10 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
i was a bit too worried.
Someone get Damon Minor's agent on the phone stat!
by fanofvanlandingham on Jun 10, 2008 9:12 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
too, worried, me, also was
Billy Hayes: His job is better than yours.
by delorean on Jun 10, 2008 10:01 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I was concerned, but I think Sharksrog’s head will explode when he sees this headline.
2008 Giants: A steaming pile of scrap!
by Goofus on Jun 10, 2008 9:12 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Sharksrog has read it, and is preparing the indictment
by Moggeee on Jun 10, 2008 9:14 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
That boom you will hear is Sharksrog’s head exploding
2008 Giants: A steaming pile of scrap!
by Goofus on Jun 10, 2008 9:15 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
BAN PLZ
"he walked 18; new league record! Struck out 18, another new league record! He also hit the sportswriter, the PA announcer, the bull mascot twice..."
by i did my job on Jun 10, 2008 9:22 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Not cool
I’m thinking of starting 10 more fan posts just so this is no longer on the side of the main page.
by AngelWillSaveUs on Jun 10, 2008 9:24 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Extraordinary Lies
require extraordinary measures.
(And later, we shall deal with the liar.)
by Moggeee on Jun 10, 2008 9:29 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I dislike you.
Neglectful father of David Quinowski
by marcello on Jun 10, 2008 9:28 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
I got a chuckle.
My Dave Righetti is better than your Dave Righetti.
by howtheyscored on Jun 10, 2008 9:34 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
Extraordinary dumbasses
require extraordinary beatdowns.
by Moggeee on Jun 10, 2008 9:44 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Dang, I was shooting for retard.
My Dave Righetti is better than your Dave Righetti.
by howtheyscored on Jun 10, 2008 10:41 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Jesus Christ, this scared the shit out of me
by FluLikeSymptoms on Jun 10, 2008 9:39 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
This bogus post comes at a bad time
(He already had flulike symptoms.)
by Moggeee on Jun 10, 2008 9:48 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
that's right
it’s not the flu, it’s flu like symptoms
by FluLikeSymptoms on Jun 10, 2008 10:35 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
can a mod change the title of this fanpost? I, too, had the shit scared out of me. >:(
Matt Cain: He'll save children, but not the Dodger children.
by jponry on Jun 10, 2008 10:07 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs
It doesn’t seem like we can edit fanposts anymore.
by Natto on Jun 10, 2008 10:17 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Perhaps Grant didn’t take to kindly to you nominating him for dumbass in a leading role?!?
Adoptive papa to Omar...so basically I'm screwed.
by PacBellBoozer on Jun 10, 2008 11:14 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
sharing is caring
If I learnt anything from the Care Bears….+
Jonathan Sanchez. He's left-handed, like Barry Zito. His fastball breaks 80, unlike Zito.
by Aadik on Jun 10, 2008 11:54 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
That was my first inclination...
...but I think the responses will be funny.
by Grant on Jun 11, 2008 12:38 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
There’s a reason I got a chuckle.
My Dave Righetti is better than your Dave Righetti.
by howtheyscored on Jun 11, 2008 12:47 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
This just looks like a cheap play for this guy to plug his own site.
Grant, go to his site and post the headline “Lincecum Traded” headline with a story of how before playing long toss yesterday, Cain and Lincecum traded baseball caps. Oh the hilarity.
2008 Giants: A steaming pile of scrap!
by Goofus on Jun 11, 2008 8:20 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Dick.
yeah, well, the whole world stinks, francine -- so get used to it!
by satyricrash on Jun 11, 2008 12:44 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs
I’m disappointed that I wasn’t the first to make a sharksrog joke.
by xanthan on Jun 11, 2008 5:44 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs
I hate you as a person.
If you do this again I will hunt you down and eat your children.
Proud pappa of....STEVE HOLM!!
by UnleashTheGore on Jun 11, 2008 8:12 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs
I love cannibal jokes!
Cannibals don’t like to eat clowns because the taste funny.
Cannibals like to go to cocktail parties because of the finger foods.
When cannibals go out for lunch, they usually order open-faced sanwiches.
2008 Giants: A steaming pile of scrap!
by Goofus on Jun 11, 2008 10:17 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
If you wanna wait a little bit I’ll make a balsamic reduction that goes very well with tender meat.
"While conservatives tell you 'leave things alone and no one will lose,' and liberals tell you 'interfere a lot and no one will lose,' baseball says 'someone will lose.' Not only says it - but insists upon it! ... Democracy is lovely, but baseball's more mature." BVCE supports SF Dugout and Manny Burriss.
by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Jun 11, 2008 8:56 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
DIARY HIJACK
hahahaha….leave it to Baron to hijack a post with foodie talk!
I’ve got nothing to add to the balsamic reduction talk, but I have invented a new drink folks….give this doozy a try….
Equal parts:
mango juice
cranberry juice
Absolut vanilla vodka.
Pour over ice and have one hell of a night, or morning if that’s your thing!
Adoptive papa to Omar...so basically I'm screwed.
by PacBellBoozer on Jun 11, 2008 9:21 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I invented a drink one night while I was rather inebriated. We named it Russians Against a Brick Wall, in part because it hits you like a brick wall. It’s your basic Tall Black Russian but made with cherry cola, cranberry juice, and a shot of grenadine.
I never said I enjoyed it. I’m saying I mixed it, named it, and drank it. Sticking to white Russians from now on.
"While conservatives tell you 'leave things alone and no one will lose,' and liberals tell you 'interfere a lot and no one will lose,' baseball says 'someone will lose.' Not only says it - but insists upon it! ... Democracy is lovely, but baseball's more mature." BVCE supports SF Dugout and Manny Burriss.
by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Jun 11, 2008 9:42 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
That sounds like one of the most vile things evar.
Tentatively adopting Dan Ortmeier. And Boom Goes the Dynamite.
by Andy from DC on Jun 11, 2008 10:02 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
+1 for your attempt at inventiveness while inebriated…that takes some courage right there!
Last time I tried that I was missing half my clothes the next morning and everyone was calling me Shirley.
Adoptive papa to Omar...so basically I'm screwed.
by PacBellBoozer on Jun 11, 2008 11:28 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I nearly put out my own eye with a pool cue and managed to piss off an ex friend by hooking up with one of his friends, all in the same night. HA!
"While conservatives tell you 'leave things alone and no one will lose,' and liberals tell you 'interfere a lot and no one will lose,' baseball says 'someone will lose.' Not only says it - but insists upon it! ... Democracy is lovely, but baseball's more mature." BVCE supports SF Dugout and Manny Burriss.
by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Jun 11, 2008 12:30 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
My friends and I invented a drink at a party. It involved a a jello mold with fruit chunks, a blender and lots of Vodka. It was sort Jamba Juice meets Siberian alcholism. We called it the “Vertigo” since it made us dizzsy and the U2 song was playing at the time.
2008 Giants: A steaming pile of scrap!
by Goofus on Jun 11, 2008 1:13 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
The idea of drinking gelatin definitely makes me dizzy.
"While conservatives tell you 'leave things alone and no one will lose,' and liberals tell you 'interfere a lot and no one will lose,' baseball says 'someone will lose.' Not only says it - but insists upon it! ... Democracy is lovely, but baseball's more mature." BVCE supports SF Dugout and Manny Burriss.
by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Jun 11, 2008 1:35 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
very Iron Chef (Japanese version). I’m sure the panel would’ve been reminded of warm, sunny days with their family on the coast of Japan with the geletin. Of course, the fruit would’ve been replaced with carp.
by tyrannoman on Jun 11, 2008 1:37 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Further OT
PBB, did you catch the Portugal-Czech Republic match this morning? That was some excellent futbol. Portugal looks really good right now. Deco with the goal and the beautiful assist on Ronaldo’s goal!
It’s amazing how far that team has come with having Gene Hackman as their coach.
Eagerly awaiting Crazy Crab Bobblehead Night on 7/18.
by Kitspool on Jun 11, 2008 11:03 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
F U man....F U
Dude…My Tivo is recording it for me…I’ve seen every Euro game to date and then you come along and spoiling the beans! Dammit, man!
I guess I’m going to have to watch So You Think You Can Dance tonight instead of the game that you just ruined. And yes…you read that right…I watch So You Think You Can Dance!!!
Because you opened it up though….I’ve been really impressed with the Dutch and Portuguese sides so far. I’m pulling for Scolari and his boys, but in all honesty, as long as them corrupt Italians lose, I’ll be happy!
Adoptive papa to Omar...so basically I'm screwed.
by PacBellBoozer on Jun 11, 2008 11:21 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Me and my friends made up a drink with
a crap load of vodka
a crap load of tequila (preferably not top shelf)
a teaspoon of cranberry juice
We called it the Pancho Stalin. Then we found out that it’s already known as the Blackbird, which seems like a lame name.
So we just drank whiskey from the bottle.
Something sort of funny/sarcastic about the Giants here.
by UnderRadar on Jun 11, 2008 2:41 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
this might date me...
But when I was in college we invented a drink:
Tequila and Jolt cola – “The Crispin Glover”.
Oh, and if you added cheese whiz, it was a “Geraldo Rivera”, but we never actually drank one with cheese whiz, the original was bad enough.
FIRE BRIAN SABEAN
by zenbitz on Jun 11, 2008 3:53 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
I once made a Christmas goose with a port glaze that was quite good. I think that would go well with human-veal as well.
by tyrannoman on Jun 11, 2008 9:32 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs
Yeah, I was thinking flu-like symptoms too
I got a chuckle, but then again most folks say that I’m not right. I can see him in the blecahers with the dialogue…. Hey batter, batter…schwiiiing!
by timmeh on Jun 11, 2008 9:42 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs
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