Goofus for President

by Lidocaine on Mar 8, 2008 10:19 PM PST Comment 21 comments

and PantsMan for VP.
Why Not?
Go to the window. Open it up. Yell.
I want Goofus.
I want PantsMan.

This FanPost is reader-generated, and it does not necessarily reflect the views of McCovey Chronicles. If the author uses filler to achieve the minimum word requirement, a moderator may edit the FanPost for his or her own amusement.

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Re: Goofus for President

umm...

2002? I'm over it. But I'll never be over Rich Aurilia.

by wjackalope on Mar 8, 2008 10:26 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Goofus for President

I'm so sick of this blog's blatant support for Goofus and PantsMan. What makes them any better than candidates Mayor of 311 and WalrusMan?

Nattowear | artstuff | Durham? I know 'im!

by Natto on Mar 8, 2008 10:26 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Whoah...

I was nominated? Huh?

Coming to you from the Land of Many Beers

by WalrusMan on Mar 8, 2008 10:51 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

You want Goofus

I want to know where you got the physician's letter for medicinal heroin.

by Moggeee on Mar 8, 2008 10:28 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Goofus for President

Well he's right about one thing. I do want pants, man.

He is Vengeance. He is the Knight. He is Dave Righetti. PRAY TO HIM!

by howtheyscored on Mar 8, 2008 10:34 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Goofus for President

How 'bout Goofy Pants man?

by Lidocaine on Mar 8, 2008 10:37 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Goofus for President

Pants in this town, Howie, are overrated. And Expendable. And oftentimes, optional.

But not the PantsMan.

by Moggeee on Mar 8, 2008 10:38 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Goofus for President

78% of the Superdelegates have claimed that they will swing to Goofus if PantsMan is on the Ticket.

by Lidocaine on Mar 8, 2008 10:43 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Goofus for President

Goofus, with or without pants or PantsMan, is more than happy to swing with them.

by Moggeee on Mar 8, 2008 10:52 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Goofus for President

I think that's "Super".

by Lidocaine on Mar 8, 2008 11:13 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Candidates for change! Oh Yes We Can!

Goofus and PantsMan?!?

YOU HAVE A CHOICE, MCCOVENITES! Together we can change this team...one shitty ass player at a time!

Come November, vote the E / PacBellBoozer ticket...
At least we'll give them idiots running this team something to sweat about!

(cue ringing telephone sound)

It's 3 AM and your children are safe and asleep
But there's a phone in the clubhouse and it's ringing
Something is happening to this team
You're vote will decide who answers that call
Weather it's someone who already knows that Sabean is a douche
Knows that Magowan is a money hungry whore
Someone tested and ready to lead us through another long and losing season
It's 3 AM and your children are safe and asleep...

Who do you want answering the phone?

I'm PacBellBoozer and I approve this message.

Screw the Giants, but not Omar. I'm getting drunk and watching some footy.

by PacBellBoozer on Mar 9, 2008 1:03 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Candidates for change! Oh Yes We Can!

But what is your policy on garbage removal?

Nattowear | artstuff | Durham? I know 'im!

by Natto on Mar 9, 2008 1:24 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Candidates for change! Oh Yes We Can!

Garbage removal?!? Isn't that what the bay is for?

Just huck all that shit in the bay and it'll be all good. Generations from now people will find Mando and Commissioner Bud wearing some concrete boots in the bottom of that bay.

Once we've filled up the bay we'll just ship it all down to Southern Cali....Those bastards don't really need clean air, water, or land to breed do they?

Screw the Giants, but not Omar. I'm getting drunk and watching some footy.

by PacBellBoozer on Mar 9, 2008 2:09 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Goofus for President

I see all my negative campaigning is starting to pay dividends.

Hoping tk's recovery is faster than Raj going from first to third!

by Goofus on Mar 9, 2008 11:14 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Re: Goofus for President

You won't see me as a vice presidential candidate -- you know, I'm running for president. We have won twice as many states as Senator Goofus, and have a higher popular vote, and I think we can maintain our delegate count.

"Robb Nen is going to get you" - Benito Santiago to Chipper Jones, 10/7/02

by Pants Man on Mar 9, 2008 11:36 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

The Pants Has It

Goofus is at a disadvantage politically, being much more focused on his sperm count.

by Moggeee on Mar 9, 2008 11:56 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Goofus for President

BUT SENATOR GOOFUS CAN WIN THE

BIG

STATES!

He is Vengeance. He is the Knight. He is Dave Righetti. PRAY TO HIM!

by howtheyscored on Mar 9, 2008 12:22 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Goofus for President

Yeah, I got your big states right here in my, uh... pants.

"Robb Nen is going to get you" - Benito Santiago to Chipper Jones, 10/7/02

by Pants Man on Mar 9, 2008 12:47 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Goofus for President

A fine ticket indeed, as Goofus and particularly Pants understands the trend towards "bottom-up" campaigning.

Didn't you used to be Barry Zito?

by VidaWantsYourCar on Mar 9, 2008 2:13 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

A wet pants leg is a public scandal

But I'm afraid their Trickle-Down economic policy has something to do with their leaky bladders.

by Moggeee on Mar 9, 2008 2:29 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Announcing

I'm running in 2012. It's my estimated graduation from omg college. Frankly I don't see how I could be president AND lay the groundwork for my world domination...I mean, study and better myself in working toward my career goals. It's just a lot to balance, y'know. Foreign policy and midterms, at the same time? Brr.

I'd rather watch the candidates slug it out this year. Thus I can defeat the weak next election.

Democracy is lovely but baseball is more mature. BVCE supports Manny Burriss and SF Dugout.

by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Mar 10, 2008 9:10 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs