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Amelia Marie Brisbee

Grant_tiny by Grant on

8 lbs., 9 oz. -- 20.5 inches

 

 

Me: You picked the name for the cat, so I get to pick the name for the baby.

Wife: Wait, but you picked out the cat's name, and...

Me: Shhhhh. We could argue all day about who named the cat Hitchcock in the middle of his or her movie-nerd phase, but that wouldn't get us anywhere.

I have some ideas for the baby, but they're, like, double names. You know, first and middle name together. I just like the sound. I've narrowed it down to two.

Wife: Mmm-hmm.

Me: First suggestion: Mary.

Wife: Well, that's okay, though...

Me: Middle name: Chelle. Like, an abbreviated Michelle. I just like the sound.

Wife: Mary Chelle Brisbee.

Me: It just pops, doesn't it?

Wife: No. Next suggestion.

Me: That's alright; it was my second choice. My first choice is Lindsey.

Wife: Hmm, I'd be open to...

Me: Middle name: Come.

Wife: Lindsey Come Brisbee?

Me: A little unconventional, sure, but...

Wife: No, don't worry. It's on the short list. It sounds nothing like a porno name, and it's entirely appropriate. Plus, you know that I've been hoping of some awful bastardization of a Giants player's name for the name of our child. Before we knew it was a girl, you suggested "Al Drete" and "Uribetu Thompsontu Clark Brisbee"...

Me: That last one just sounded so worldly...

Wife: You're just a huge help in this name selection process. I can't even begin to describe how much of a help you are.

Me: Thanks!

Wife: Can you go outside and check the mail?

Me: Sure!

goes out front door

sound of deadbolt latching

Regular posting will resume soon. After, say, my second hour of sleep within a 72-hour time frame.

3 recs | Comment 230 comments

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Holy cow, man!!

Congrats!

#1 JUDY STEFFES FAN
My favorite pie is (name of pie flavor)
Bay City Ball

by xanthan on Oct 29, 2008 12:51 PM PDT   0 recs

Also, should have named Neifiette Perez Brisbee…I’m liking the sound of that one.

#1 JUDY STEFFES FAN
My favorite pie is (name of pie flavor)
Bay City Ball

by xanthan on Oct 29, 2008 12:52 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Mazel Tov

"Buy High-Sell Low"--The Brian Sabean Method Of Trading

by Mordy From Monsey on Oct 30, 2008 4:48 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

OMG! Holy crap!

Congratulations! :D

Matt Cain: He'll save children, but not the Dodger children.
PABLO SANDOVAL AM STEAL DEATH, DESTROYER OF WORLDS.

by jponry on Oct 29, 2008 12:52 PM PDT   0 recs

Congratulations, Papa Grant!

by rotorueter on Oct 29, 2008 12:54 PM PDT   0 recs

Congrats Grant!

Sergio Romo will gladly hand you a bench to sit on / GIANTSPACE™ / Adopted brother of the AnVil

by SoFa King Mike on Oct 29, 2008 12:57 PM PDT   0 recs

Congratulations!

This still doesn’t mean that my guess wasn’t right. I’m betting you’re still out of ideas, the baby was just an excuse that happened to pop up.

And on a search no porn stars pop up with a Lindsey Come name. I have to say this is probably going to pop up sometime in the near future though.

The Basil Fawlty Moderating Strategy:
"We could run a nice blog here if we didn't have all these members getting in the way."

by WalrusMan on Oct 29, 2008 12:57 PM PDT   0 recs

You mean pop out?

by cheno on Oct 29, 2008 1:11 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I have to say this is probably going to pop up sometime in the near future though.

That’s what she said?

STEVE HOLM! refuses to be the odd man out.

by UnleashTheGore on Oct 29, 2008 2:07 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Congratulations!

She’s beautiful.

by cornball on Oct 29, 2008 1:00 PM PDT   0 recs

Very, very cool.

my cousin and i got noah lowry's autograph after he came out of a porta-potty. he was nice about it.

by hubert on Oct 29, 2008 1:00 PM PDT   0 recs

Woah, wait a second

Was your daughter born yesterday or today? Because if it was yesterday, then she shares my sons birthday.

You know it’s a good sign when one’s child is born during the world series. As for my son, he was born mere hours after the Red Sox won their first world series in decades.

Congratulations. And don’t worry about the sleep. You don’t get any more for another year or so.

Catcher are base running. Hitters are offense.

by thehavenot on Oct 29, 2008 1:01 PM PDT   0 recs

so there's a good chance

that in the distant future, the Giants winning the world series will coincide with her birthday. how sweet it will be for her.

unless, of course, she decides to rebel against you two and becomes a die-hard Dodgers fan.

STEVE HOLM! refuses to be the odd man out.

by UnleashTheGore on Oct 29, 2008 2:08 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Congrats!

We’ll all make sure BLB doesn’t call her Scott.

I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.

by Takimoto on Oct 29, 2008 1:05 PM PDT   0 recs

Whoa it's a Baby Brisbee!

Congrats! Also I seriously LOL’ed at ‘Uribetu Thompsontu Clark Brisbee’

Giants! Giants! HELP US GOD!

by j14 on Oct 29, 2008 1:06 PM PDT   0 recs

You could just use UTC as a nickname

I support Roger Kieschnick in his quest to becoming the best Kieschnick ever to play professional baseball.

by Takimoto on Oct 29, 2008 1:15 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Congratulations !!

Both mine are in college. Instructions, just in case no one has told you yet

Photobucket

My adopted son Matt Downs. Lost in the wilderness of mediocrity.

by nvsfg on Oct 29, 2008 1:06 PM PDT   0 recs

This is pretty solid advice.

#1 JUDY STEFFES FAN
My favorite pie is (name of pie flavor)
Bay City Ball

by xanthan on Oct 29, 2008 1:08 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Those were a howl

More

Anagram of "Giants pitcher Tim Lincecum" = TENSE, CLIMACTIC, TRIUMPHING

by Stuttering John Tamargo on Oct 29, 2008 1:24 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

The Denker bus is now bound for San Diego. Those who were passengers on it are now angrily stranded at a gas station in Modesto, CA. Not much about baseball here .

by oldjacket on Oct 29, 2008 1:31 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

The Basil Fawlty Moderating Strategy:
"We could run a nice blog here if we didn't have all these members getting in the way."

by WalrusMan on Oct 29, 2008 1:34 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Someone print this out, get in a time machine, go back to 1947, and hand this to Barbara Bush.

by satyricrash on Oct 29, 2008 1:50 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

take it easy now

Jeb isn’t THAT dumb…

STEVE HOLM! refuses to be the odd man out.

by UnleashTheGore on Oct 29, 2008 2:08 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Now that I look at it, Jeb still has that head.

by satyricrash on Oct 29, 2008 5:25 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

A nurse once told me that they used to keep a bottle of scotch around to dip the nipple of the bottle for fussy babies that wouldn’t go to sleep.

Don't think, it could only hurt the ballclub.

by ResDog on Oct 29, 2008 2:00 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

That’s dumb. Nurses have access to morphine.

by satyricrash on Oct 29, 2008 5:24 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I’ve heard that as well.

Am I mad, in a coma, or back in time? Whatever's happened, it's like I've landed on a different planet. Now, maybe if I can work out the reason, I can get home.

by Lyle on Oct 30, 2008 5:45 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I drink scotch because I don’t trust the water supply.

#1 JUDY STEFFES FAN
My favorite pie is (name of pie flavor)
Bay City Ball

by xanthan on Oct 30, 2008 5:54 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

The image of a nurse dipping her nipple in scotch is pretty ok.

Zooperstars, they quack me up!

by Goofus on Oct 30, 2008 10:36 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

morphine too.

They say some players get out of bed hitting; Pablo Sandoval doesn't wait that long

by bgunn on Oct 30, 2008 11:18 AM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Congratulations!

Trent Kline: Decentish. Also, my website is called ChatterBalks Dot Com. It's not being updated right now. Hope for more at your own risk.

by groug on Oct 29, 2008 1:08 PM PDT   0 recs

lol Al Drete

Congratulations, Grant.

by rightcenterfielder on Oct 29, 2008 1:08 PM PDT   0 recs

Congratulations, Grant! Love the attire.

by cheno on Oct 29, 2008 1:11 PM PDT   0 recs

Congrats Grant and Mrs. Brisbee

She’s a beautiful little girl.

And hey, for once in all my miserable years posting on this site, I was right about something.

No, my Crazy Crab bobblehead is not for sale.

by Kitspool on Oct 29, 2008 1:15 PM PDT   0 recs

(Ahem)

People ask me what I do in winter when there's no baseball. I'll tell you what I do. I stare out the window and wait for spring. Rogers Hornsby

by igotnothing on Oct 29, 2008 1:22 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

No.

You get nothing!

The Basil Fawlty Moderating Strategy:
"We could run a nice blog here if we didn't have all these members getting in the way."

by WalrusMan on Oct 29, 2008 1:26 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

congrats!

I had no idea that Mom’s basement had room for a family.

Fairley odd parent to Wendell

by WTF on Oct 29, 2008 1:17 PM PDT   0 recs

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!

IN ALL CAPS AND STUFF!

Psycho killer, qu'est-ce que c'est?

by shikantaza on Oct 29, 2008 1:19 PM PDT   0 recs

I echo the congratulations! I guess you are forgiven for the lack of regular updates. FOR NOW

Adopted son of in limbo Brad Hennessey. Beloved for a stolen base much like Dave Roberts

by AndYourBirdCanSing on Oct 29, 2008 1:19 PM PDT   0 recs

Awesome!

Congrats, Grant.

And you score major points for the headgear, even if it is pink and not actually Giants colors. I provide an exemption to the no-pink teamwear rule only for newly born baby girls.

But if she’s still wearing pink Giants gear after, say, 6 weeks, we’ll have to start instituting some significant penalties.

And tell the baby mama she did a great job.

It's my blarg! Quick Pitch

by can of corn on Oct 29, 2008 1:21 PM PDT   0 recs

Agreed.

First thing Mr. Singapore needs to do when he moves back here is get some black and orange on his daugther, not the pink and white. Acceptable for a bit though.

The Basil Fawlty Moderating Strategy:
"We could run a nice blog here if we didn't have all these members getting in the way."

by WalrusMan on Oct 29, 2008 1:27 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

CONGRATULATIONS

Girls are so much better than boys!

People ask me what I do in winter when there's no baseball. I'll tell you what I do. I stare out the window and wait for spring. Rogers Hornsby

by igotnothing on Oct 29, 2008 1:21 PM PDT   0 recs

That’s what she said!

#1 JUDY STEFFES FAN
My favorite pie is (name of pie flavor)
Bay City Ball

by xanthan on Oct 29, 2008 1:22 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I wish.

The Basil Fawlty Moderating Strategy:
"We could run a nice blog here if we didn't have all these members getting in the way."

by WalrusMan on Oct 29, 2008 1:27 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

iawtc

Matt Cain: He'll save children, but not the Dodger children.
PABLO SANDOVAL AM STEAL DEATH, DESTROYER OF WORLDS.

by jponry on Oct 29, 2008 1:25 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Yes we are.

"You lost me at carrots, which was the first draft of 'you had me at hello'".

by giantscatcher on Oct 29, 2008 1:26 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Congrats, Grant!

When are you uploading the home video of the birth to the site? I can’t wait to see what kind of Gameday Thread .gif can be made out of it.

Check out The Examined Life. Or don't. Whatever.
"I been waitin' a long time for this! I been waitin' since the f**kin' amateurs!" --WILL "THE THRILL" CLARK

by Josh from Hollywood on Oct 29, 2008 1:22 PM PDT   0 recs

It can’t be any worse than that GoofusDancing.gif

#1 JUDY STEFFES FAN
My favorite pie is (name of pie flavor)
Bay City Ball

by xanthan on Oct 29, 2008 1:23 PM PDT to parent up   1 recs

Oh man..

That made my day.

The Basil Fawlty Moderating Strategy:
"We could run a nice blog here if we didn't have all these members getting in the way."

by WalrusMan on Oct 29, 2008 1:27 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Oh god

Matt Cain: He'll save children, but not the Dodger children.
PABLO SANDOVAL AM STEAL DEATH, DESTROYER OF WORLDS.

by jponry on Oct 29, 2008 1:30 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I wonder..

What his wife would say.

The Basil Fawlty Moderating Strategy:
"We could run a nice blog here if we didn't have all these members getting in the way."

by WalrusMan on Oct 29, 2008 1:32 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

She's adorable!

Congrats!

"You lost me at carrots, which was the first draft of 'you had me at hello'".

by giantscatcher on Oct 29, 2008 1:25 PM PDT   0 recs

AT&T Park, sometime in 2014

Jr. Giants Announcer Amelia Brisbee: “NOW BATTING….NUMBER FORTY-EIGHT….PAAAAA-BLO……SANNN…DO-VAL”

No, my Crazy Crab bobblehead is not for sale.

by Kitspool on Oct 29, 2008 1:26 PM PDT   0 recs

Nahhh..

He’d train her. She’d be well versed in Paul Stanley, Juggernate, and that.

I’d just like to see someone announce “Now batting, the pitcher, Tim the Enchanter!”

The Basil Fawlty Moderating Strategy:
"We could run a nice blog here if we didn't have all these members getting in the way."

by WalrusMan on Oct 29, 2008 1:29 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

More Congrats!

And hopefully Pablito will get a better number than 48.

Reminds me too much of Russ Ortiz, and the last thing I remember from 2002.

Tim Lincecum is Baseball's Chuck Norris

by Azantor on Oct 29, 2008 4:41 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I Think It's A Girl!

Photobucket

Dodgers fans eat their young.

by redhornet78 on Oct 29, 2008 1:26 PM PDT   0 recs

Congrats

Amelia Marie sort of sounds like a hybrid of Rich Aurilia and Calvin Murray, so that has to count for something, right?

Do you Wazzel?

by NeifiChicken on Oct 29, 2008 1:29 PM PDT   0 recs

Code broken.

The Basil Fawlty Moderating Strategy:
"We could run a nice blog here if we didn't have all these members getting in the way."

by WalrusMan on Oct 29, 2008 1:30 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

CONGRATULATIONS, GRANT!

You’ve done good work.

Bonds stands alone.

Proud adopted parent of future big league slugger Thomas Neal

by nostocksjustbonds on Oct 29, 2008 1:29 PM PDT   0 recs

Yep, I'd say his best work.

Well…ok besides Choose Your Own Adventure.

The Basil Fawlty Moderating Strategy:
"We could run a nice blog here if we didn't have all these members getting in the way."

by WalrusMan on Oct 29, 2008 1:30 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I think Grant just created his own adventure...

“If you’d like to clean up someone else’s poop, turn to page 42.”

Check out The Examined Life. Or don't. Whatever.
"I been waitin' a long time for this! I been waitin' since the f**kin' amateurs!" --WILL "THE THRILL" CLARK

by Josh from Hollywood on Oct 29, 2008 1:35 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Congrats Grant,

and Matt Cain still sucks . . . .

/ducks from flying dirty diaper/

NO, we're not trading Matt Cain! What's that you say? We are? Armageddon is upon us!

by Buck Henry on Oct 29, 2008 1:32 PM PDT   0 recs

and this will be

the best day of your life, regardless of what Sabean does from here on out.

NO, we're not trading Matt Cain! What's that you say? We are? Armageddon is upon us!

by Buck Henry on Oct 29, 2008 1:39 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

I had forgotten about that collection of jokes. fun stuff.

Todd Jennings: If he's on the DL, he can't suck as much, right?

by Speedforthewin on Oct 29, 2008 2:17 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Congratulations!

Proud adoptive parent of Tim Alderson.

by Anticon23 on Oct 29, 2008 1:33 PM PDT   0 recs

Congratulations

She looks like she’s worried about what Sabean’s offseason moves will be.

The Denker bus is now bound for San Diego. Those who were passengers on it are now angrily stranded at a gas station in Modesto, CA. Not much about baseball here .

by oldjacket on Oct 29, 2008 1:34 PM PDT   0 recs

If Grant’s lucky, Sabes will sign her to a 10-year, $200 million contract right now.

No, my Crazy Crab bobblehead is not for sale.

by Kitspool on Oct 29, 2008 1:37 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Hey there’s a good idea! Then we won’t have any money left to spend on Casey Blake.

The Denker bus is now bound for San Diego. Those who were passengers on it are now angrily stranded at a gas station in Modesto, CA. Not much about baseball here .

by oldjacket on Oct 29, 2008 1:38 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Anagram of "Amelia Marie Brisbee"

I AM A SEEMLIER BARBIE

All my best to the Brisbee clan.

Anagram of "Giants pitcher Tim Lincecum" = TENSE, CLIMACTIC, TRIUMPHING

by Stuttering John Tamargo on Oct 29, 2008 1:36 PM PDT   0 recs

LOL IRL.

It's my blarg! Quick Pitch

by can of corn on Oct 29, 2008 2:34 PM PDT to parent up   0 recs

Congratulations!

One of the best things that can happen

by SFGAmsterdam on Oct 29, 2008 1:36 PM PDT   0 recs

Congratulations, Grant! And don’t worry, you can take all the time you need with the baby, the Giants will still suck when you get back.

Idolizing Robb Nen since 2002...

by Smoke on the Water on Oct 29, 2008 1:38 PM PDT   0 recs

Congratulations! She looks beautiful. My son was born in April 1997, and the Giants promptly went on an eight-year winning spree. Let’s hope for the same with Amelia.

Coincidentally, my birthday (32nd) was yesterday.

by Dan from NM on Oct 29, 2008 1:38 PM PDT   0 recs

Congratulations

Guys on the internet can get laid! There is hope

I see the future, and it is Pablo

by CB30 on Oct 29, 2008 1:40 PM PDT   0 recs

Photobucket

Check out The Examined Life. Or don't. Whatever.
"I been waitin' a long time for this! I been waitin' since the f**kin' amateurs!" --WILL "THE THRILL" CLARK