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Open What-present should-we-send-Matt-Cain thread

The offense has averaged 2.33 runs a game for Matt Cain in 14 starts (not counting the 15 run outburst).

I propose we send a gift to Matty. What should it be?

A box of chick flicks?  A dictionary that he could give to the offense so they can look up "Run Support"?  I'm half joking, but also half committed to sending him SOMEthing.  Ideas?

                                                                                                                                                                                                               

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