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Prelude to a goof

by Grant on Dec 20, 2006 9:07 AM PST in News Comment 129 comments

The Giants signing Ryan Klesko? Awesome. I have that same warm feeling I had when the Giants signed Orel Hershiser and traded for Steve Finley: that warm, warm feeling of my own blood trickling out of my hand after I stab it with an ice pick. It's not the move itself that's bad -- Klesko still might have a little pop, the price was right, and it means less at-bats for Feliz and Niekro -- it's that I can't stand Ryan Klesko. Gah, those stupid sunglasses...that weenie soul patch...the head made of potted meat...gah.

It would make me laugh when he tried to play outfield defense. It looked like his legs were perpetually Hoth-wrapped, and there was always a small chance he'd get one of his own cleats stuck in his mouth. It kept me watching. Now I'll be watching in horror instead of amusement as he tromps around first base like a dromedary wearing high heels for the first time.

Whatever. If he hits 20 bombs, he's a member of the family. The mediocrest family that ever mediocred into a mediocre factory on St. Mediocre's Day, but still.... Lefty sizes the move up pretty danged well, so in lieu of an attempt at analysis, I'll just do a quick and dirty attempt at my Most Unlikable Players of the Past Twenty Years team:

C - Kirt Manwaring. Oooh, now that guy used to rile me...wait, sorry, I meant A.J. Pierzynski.
1B - Eric Karros
2B - Jose Oquendo
SS - Neifi Perez
3B - Chipper Jones
LF - Klesko
CF - Steve Finley
RF - Raul Mondesi

SP - Jeff Juden
SP - Allen Watson
SP - Brad Penny
SP - Orel Hershiser
SP - Randy Johnson

RP - Terry Adams
RP - Julian Tavarez
RP - Eric Gagne
RP - John Rocker
RP - Jose Mesa

Player/Manager - Pete Rose

Omissions are guaranteed, but that looks like a pretty annoying bunch. Please let me know who I've missed.

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Comments

One for the rotation

Carlos Perez, the assclown who used to strike a pose on the mound after every strikeout. Plus he was a Dodger and his middle name is Gross. (wtf?)

Read SFDugout. It'll make you a better person.

by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Dec 20, 2006 9:11 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: One for the rotation

Might as well make it the entire Perez clan - pascual and melido were pretty damn annoying too.

But I do give Pascual high mark for being the only player I have ever seen attempt a pickoff at 1st by throwing between his legs.

The Dodgers are evil.

by irwin on Dec 20, 2006 9:33 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: One for the rotation

I'd like to tack on Odalis Perez, while we're at it.

When it's time for a change...

by squirrel on Dec 20, 2006 11:21 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

How did Benitez not make the list? The man's a legend for "dislikeability" for the relief pitchers.

Also, Paul O Neill is perhaps the most annoying player in the history of baseball.

by Aadik on Dec 20, 2006 9:16 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Most annoying SF Giants, ever:

LF- Barry "being Barry" Bonds
F.P. "Spark plug? No, I said butt plug" Santangelo
CF- Ricky "useless piece of crap" Ledee
SS- Neifi "waived by the Royals" Perez
2B- Jeff "porn stache" Kent
3B- Charlie "why does Dusty keep hitting him clean-up?" Hayes
1B- J.R. "strike-out" Phillips
C-A.J.
RP- Jim "gasoline on the fire" Poole / Jeff "meat head" Juden
SP- Livan "Leave-In" Hernandez / Brett "cry baby" Tomko

by Kid Fresh on Dec 20, 2006 9:19 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Chris Brown bumps Charlie Hayes on my version.

Estes would join my rotation, but he's still jumping up and down saying "Ow! Ow! Ow!" while holding his ankle.

Biggest mankinder in the history of no brain.

by Goofus on Dec 20, 2006 10:26 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

And Ruben Rivera on the bench, in case they need a pinch-runner.

You're nobody 'til everybody in
this town thinks you're a bastard - Elvis Costello

by EliminateMe on Dec 20, 2006 10:47 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

What about Sir Signey Ponson? Surely he belongs on that list as well.

Hats for bats, keep bats warm !

by PacBellBoozer on Dec 20, 2006 10:49 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Sidney that is...damn fingers don't want to type today

Hats for bats, keep bats warm !

by PacBellBoozer on Dec 20, 2006 10:49 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Curt Schilling was just on KNBR saying that Grant's list was not even close to correct.

"How can you have such a list, or any list for that matter, without the name Curt Schilling on it?" opined the Red Sox hurler. "Schilling, Schill, bloody sock, Schilling, hero, and Schill. That's the rotation I'd go to war with."

by biff pocoroba on Dec 20, 2006 9:21 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

You are correct, sir...

Watson gets bumped.

by Grant on Dec 20, 2006 9:32 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

I don't know, I'd probably have to put McGwire at first over Karros.

by sularz on Dec 20, 2006 9:26 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Pretty Strong List

I think my catcher is Piazza, my SS is Counsel, and Maddux is my game two starter.

by hammystyle on Dec 20, 2006 9:27 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Pretty Strong List

Piazza would like to hold a press conference to state to the media that he is in fact NOT annoying, and here are some extras, I mean friends, to back that claim up.

It's hard out here for a pimp.

by tk on Dec 20, 2006 12:40 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Pretty Strong List

Now Milwaukee fans can wince in sympathy as Counsell torturously tries in vain to get those pesky cobwebs out of the rafters above home plate...

Then it all came rushing back to me - like the hot kiss at the end of a wet fist!

by victor frankenstein on Dec 20, 2006 4:04 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

C: Damon Berryhill
1B: Sid Bream
2B: Mark Lemke
3B: Terry Pendleton
SS: Jeff Blauser
LF: Ron Gant
CF: Otis Nixon
RF: David Justice

SP: Steve Avery
SP: Tom Glavine
SP: Greg Maddux
SP: John Smoltz

RP: Steve Bedrosian
RP: Marvin Freeman
RP: Jay Howell
RP: Greg McMichael
RP: Kent Mercker
RP: Mark Wohlers
CL: Mike Stanton

The 1993 Braves. Most Annoying Team of All Time.

But really, my all-time annoying lineup looks more like this:

CF, LF, RF, 1B, and C: Ryan Klesko
2B, 3B, and SS: Alex Rodriguez
SP: Gregroger Madduxclemens

"Humm Baby"

by oneflapdown on Dec 20, 2006 9:27 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

You left out the chief bad-guy, John Scheurholtz, but good call!

Waiting for Nate, Marcus, Nick, & Emmanuel

by Lyle on Dec 20, 2006 9:41 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Indeed I did! Great call.

And while we're at it, let's throw in Skip Caray, Pete Van Wieren, and Don Sutton, without doubt the most annoying broadcasting team to which I've ever subjected my fragile ears.

"Humm Baby"

by oneflapdown on Dec 20, 2006 9:50 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Adding the three so-called broadcasters is the master touch that was needed to make the overall list absolute, deadly, rotten-egg type stench.

Don't worry, nothing will be allright.

by rcrusoe on Dec 20, 2006 10:47 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

And don't forget the tool Ernie Johnson.

Uhm did we leave off Bobby Cox and Leo Mazzone, or did I just miss it.

But right up there with the 1962 Yankees in terms of unlikability.

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 20, 2006 12:49 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Wow, I don't know how we forgot Cox and Mazzone. Aside from their affiliation with the Braves, I despised Cox for his "gee whiz" old man routine, and Mazzone for that incessant rocking.

Frickin' hated that team, and their annoying-ness was only exacerbated by the then-still-relative-freshness of their 1989-era suckitude.

"Humm Baby"

by oneflapdown on Dec 20, 2006 1:07 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

no doubt the 1993 Braves were annoying, but I save my hatred for the 1993 Rockies, who laid down and died every time they played them. Could they have beaten them just ONCE???

by rxmeister on Dec 21, 2006 5:21 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Damn Braves.

I remember being in college the year before and sitting around having long Braves-as-euphamisms conversations.

"Man, with this smoltz on my blauser it really hurts when I lemke."

"Sounds bad, but Mercker makes a bream that will clear that right up..."

My parents had to work a lot of overtime and take out a second mortgage to pay for my education.

"Robb Nen is going to get you" - Benito Santiago to Chipper Jones, 10/7/02

by Pants Man on Dec 20, 2006 10:24 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

I'm really glad I wasn't drinking when I read that. Coffee out the nose really stings.

You're nobody 'til everybody in
this town thinks you're a bastard - Elvis Costello

by EliminateMe on Dec 20, 2006 10:50 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

OH! We forgot Sid Bream for the "Ugliest Players" post!

Yahtzee!

by dangjackson on Dec 20, 2006 11:58 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

The only addition I can think of off the top of my head is Jim Leyritz, the King of New York, who also had jurisdiction over Tooltown and Dickville.

by Stoned Slacker on Dec 20, 2006 9:41 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

I would like to add Pete Incavaglia

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 20, 2006 12:50 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Poo-holes is fast approaching Bonds-like status for baseball prowess and jackassery with his latest comments on...everything.

JD Drew: massive prick from day 1 of his baseball career, and still behaving like a massive prick today. Will continue to behave like a massive prick for the next twenty years.

Andruw Jones: Why the hell do you spell your name with a U? And overall, just an annoyance.

Tony LaRussa: Whiniest. Tit. Ever. Please shut the fuck up. Earns spot on team as manager.

Carl Everett, even though his stupidity is really more funny than anything.

Ozzie Guillen could make the list thanks to his endemic foot-in-mouth problem.

Milton Bradley. Need I say more? Even if he spent a low-key season in Oakland last year, he fails for the main and simple reason that he was a jerk as an Indian, a jerk as a Dodger, and Andre Ethier is a Dodger because of him. Hate.

Alex Sanchez was the most annoying in the shortest amount of time as a Giant. He wins for highest concentration of fuckery perpetrated against the Giants, while as a Giant.

Manny. Manny being Manny. Manny's cornrows, Manny's do-rag, Manny's shitty defense, Manny's big mouth, Manny's this, Manny's that. F Manny.

Nomar bugs the crap out of me. Always has. He's played on my two least favorite teams and has ruined my life as a Dodger.

Boston collectively, team, management, fans, the media, everything. I have experienced more annoyance and rage blackouts dealing with their crap.

I'm starting to get angry here. I need to stop before I break something.

Read SFDugout. It'll make you a better person.

by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Dec 20, 2006 9:57 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

"Manny being Manny"

Say what you will about Mr. Ramirez, but his hustle cutting off Damon's throw one second after he launched it is priceless. You know he does it for the kicks.

http://mlb.mlb.com/NASApp/mlb/mlb/awards/y2004/tyib/tyib_awards_blooper.jsp
(click on the "Manny cuts off Damon" link)

Dodgers fans eat their young.

by redhornet78 on Dec 20, 2006 10:27 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Perhaps that was one of the reasons Damon left town. He never got over it.

by sfgfan on Dec 20, 2006 11:18 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

I know Manny gets blasted for that play a lot, but it was Damon's fault. JD can't throw! He short-armed a ball (even more than usual) such that it that would have rolled ever... so... slowly... to third base, so Manny cutting it off actually gave them a slight shot at getting Newhan at the plate.

David
SPORTSZILLA - kickass sports writing

by David Arnott on Dec 20, 2006 3:51 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Alex Sanchez

The amount of hatred he was able to accumulate in only one month with the team is remarkable... I've never seen anything like it. As the years go by it will be tougher to explain how a player who had only 43 at-bats and nine starts for the Giants over one mediocre (12-12) month in the middle of a mediocre season became such a villian.

"Robb Nen is going to get you" - Benito Santiago to Chipper Jones, 10/7/02

by Pants Man on Dec 20, 2006 10:52 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Alex Sanchez

Sanchez couldn't to ANYTHING right. He got caught on the juice and has only 6 career longballs to show for it.

Hats for bats, keep bats warm !

by PacBellBoozer on Dec 20, 2006 11:13 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Nomar eh? Don't you mean "twitch"?

Hats for bats, keep bats warm !

by PacBellBoozer on Dec 20, 2006 10:54 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Andruw

He spells it with a U 'cause he's from a Dutch colony and that's how they roll. WIKIPEDIA FTW.

Also, he named his kid ... Druw.

by tk on Dec 20, 2006 12:42 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Andruw

if they actually spell it like that in their awesome Dutch-speaking-ness then I take it back. I know very little Dutch (will be changing that one of these days) so if I am to stand corrected, I will stand corrected.

Read SFDugout. It'll make you a better person.

by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Dec 20, 2006 1:49 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

how does Feliz NOT make that list. I friggin' hate that guy!

We'd be pretty good if we didn't suck so bad.

by nostocksjustbonds on Dec 20, 2006 9:57 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

When I was a kid, bagging groceries at Safeway, Randy Johnson's sister used to shop at my store.

She looked just like him, dead-on. She was not what you would call a classicly beautiful woman ...

by devo on Dec 20, 2006 10:06 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

That is quite horrifying.

Read SFDugout. It'll make you a better person.

by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Dec 20, 2006 10:14 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Maybe that was him.

"In the Autumn of his Winter, comes man's last mad surge of youth".

by Ghost11 on Dec 20, 2006 4:54 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Roger Clemens.

Biggest mankinder in the history of no brain.

by Goofus on Dec 20, 2006 10:22 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

By the way, I saw the title and thought, "Finally, Grant wrote a column about me!"

What a disappontment.

Biggest mankinder in the history of no brain.

by Goofus on Dec 20, 2006 10:27 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

I'd like to suggest Ruben Rivera, if only for his daredevil baserunning and Jeter glove-stealing.

by da5id on Dec 20, 2006 10:29 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Derek Lowe needs to be in the rotation... remember when he gave the finger to the dugout after killing a late A's rally? He also left his wife and 3 kids last season for a Fox Sports reporter.

Plus you can just tell whenever he gets interviewed that he would be a complete dbag to hang around.

by sfmaynard on Dec 20, 2006 10:43 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

A bottomless pit of pure hate - I love it!

Don't worry, nothing will be allright.

by rcrusoe on Dec 20, 2006 10:50 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Great lists, y'all. Might I suggest one addition:

CF: Brett Butler

by Cleophus on Dec 20, 2006 10:51 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Both Weavers. While we are at it we should probably include their mom, who I have never met, nor have I seen interviewed, but I imagine her as a cross between Kurt Warner's wife and Grandma Bush. Plus, she spawned not one, but two satans.

by amoose on Dec 20, 2006 10:56 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

I might go to hell for this, but:

Dave Dravecky

I loved the guy as a player, and his bravery.
But I hated the super-Christian, John Birch thing.

by Cleophus on Dec 20, 2006 11:04 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Dude had an arm and a half though, Cleo.

by Kid Fresh on Dec 20, 2006 3:07 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

What about Soup-pan? He might very well qualify. Well at least for the super-cHristian/ Burcher

"In the Autumn of his Winter, comes man's last mad surge of youth".

by Ghost11 on Dec 20, 2006 4:58 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

How about Mike Fetters? That little bastard has always pissed me off.

When it's time for a change...

by squirrel on Dec 20, 2006 11:37 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

What, no Garvey? Steve-o is my first baseman, for sure.

Joe Garagiola at catcher.

Fernando Vina second base (based solely on facial hair and duping folks into confusing "hustle" with "talent", as so often happens).

And for the inverse situation (confusing talent for not having to work at it), Bobby Bonilla in right field.

If putting together a softball league, then I'd put Steve Lyons in as a "rover".

cue: theme from "The Natural"

by VidaWantsYourCar on Dec 20, 2006 11:55 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Jose Lima whom I think is really a howler monkey in clothing

LicenseToPills: barry bonds says words, they have nothing to do with his thoughts, they are just subjects and predicates in his mental kingdom

by Natto on Dec 20, 2006 12:12 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

The resembelence is frightening.

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 20, 2006 12:54 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

I've always found Lima to be more amusing than annoying. Josh Beckett and AJ Burnett are two I haven't seen on anyone's list.

by sfgfan on Dec 20, 2006 1:22 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Lima has to up there near the top....despite his wife.

http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/919/105/320/lima%20hooters.jpg

Why isn't Sabean held accountable for leading the Giants into many years of mediocrity???

by oldrips on Dec 20, 2006 2:02 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Definitely a Dodger wife there.

You're nobody 'til everybody in
this town thinks you're a bastard - Elvis Costello

by EliminateMe on Dec 20, 2006 2:10 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Everyone's favorite Korean baseball cartoonist presents: Jose Lima's wife.

I have no clue what's happening but for the enormous breasts there.

Read SFDugout. It'll make you a better person.

by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Dec 20, 2006 3:27 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Me neither, but a co worker brought back anpanman candies from Hong Kong. I crushed one slowly in my teeth sent a message to Mr. Schmidt.

by zenbitz on Dec 20, 2006 4:28 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

L O V E the charicature of Eric Gagne up there.

Coming to you by proxy

by howtheyscored on Dec 20, 2006 7:57 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

you're kidding right? as amussing as cartoon breasts are, how can you ignore Milton Bradley about to brain everyone aand everything with a bucket of balls.

I'll take real boobs over real insane baseball attacks any day, but cartoon boobs over cartoon attempted Dodger assasinations? please

by Trenchtown on Dec 20, 2006 9:10 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Picture worth 1000 words

I use the psycho Bradley images as LiveJournal icons.

Read SFDugout. It'll make you a better person.

by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Dec 21, 2006 10:39 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Wow, none of those people are Dodgers anymore...

by hometownboy on Dec 21, 2006 12:22 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Wow; she looks like she just fell out of an episode of Drawn together.

"In the Autumn of his Winter, comes man's last mad surge of youth".

by Ghost11 on Dec 20, 2006 5:01 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

That just has to be a super fish-eye lens on that camera. Insane.

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 20, 2006 6:27 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

First, I have to second whoever said Sidney Ponson, Brett Butler, and Steve Garvey.

But I can't believe nobody's mentioned:

Jose Canseco

Scott Spezio (soul crushing home run, soul crushing soul patch)

Joe Fucking Nathan (looked so bad in the playoffs he got pulled after a pickoff throw, then had the bad grace to be a lights-out closer after being traded for Satan)

Mahvin Benaaaahhhhd!

Atlee "First grand slam ever coughed up in an all star game" Hammaker

William VanLaunchingpad

Gah.

by DanO on Dec 20, 2006 12:23 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Felix Rodriguez Hated 4-Ever

Francisco Rodriguez, that cheating bastard, hated for fucking ever

We'd be pretty good if we didn't suck so bad.

by nostocksjustbonds on Dec 20, 2006 12:29 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

I fucking hate Mike Scioscia with a Passion

For being a True Blue Dodger, for injuring Will Clark on a play at the plate, and then for 200X.

We'd be pretty good if we didn't suck so bad.

by nostocksjustbonds on Dec 20, 2006 12:30 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

No particular order:
Ozzie Smith, Ron Cey, Darrell Thomas, Garvey, AJ, Kent, Jim Edmonds, Clemens, Sammy Sosa, Schilling, Jeff Weaver, Lenny Dykstra and Gagne.

by seyheystretch on Dec 20, 2006 12:54 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

What's your problem with Ozzie? Nothing but class from that guy and he's a Cal Poly - SLO grad. Because of the Poly thing alone he's automatically granted a "cool guy" status.

Hats for bats, keep bats warm !

by PacBellBoozer on Dec 20, 2006 1:06 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Can't speak for Stretch, but I'm guessing that the sucker punch towards the back of Thrill's head (which thankfully missed) had something to do with Ozzie's inclusion.

"Robb Nen is going to get you" - Benito Santiago to Chipper Jones, 10/7/02

by Pants Man on Dec 20, 2006 1:31 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Well generally anybody and everybody on the 87 Cardinals fit in the category of despised enemy.

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 20, 2006 2:05 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Jose Oquendo.

by Kid Fresh on Dec 20, 2006 3:10 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Not just that, but since he retired he has been a first class asshole re Cardinal fans, got caught up in a racism/reverse racism episode and been a falsly modest jerk whenever I see him interviewed. Plus the Will Clark cheap shot as Pants Man mentions.

by seyheystretch on Dec 20, 2006 4:47 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Dont forget

The Infield from Hell

Ron Cey
Bill Russell
Davey Lopes
Steve Garvey

and the patron saint of motherfucking buttplugged fuckwidgets everywhere

Tommy "Crystal Cathedral" Lasorda

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 20, 2006 12:56 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Bill Russell is Steve Garvey with blonde hair and no power.

cue: theme from "The Natural"

by VidaWantsYourCar on Dec 20, 2006 1:21 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

coversely Garvey is Russell with illegimate children and one very pissed off ex wife

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 20, 2006 2:01 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

I'm having a rough day today...

I saw a picture today in Sports Weekly of Tommy Lasorda dressed in a Santa suit, and it's really messed me up bad.

by tobias on Dec 20, 2006 4:22 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

I have to write this name or my mother will disown me:

Trevor Wilson

Just one time before I die

by Katman on Dec 20, 2006 1:18 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

After he left, Jack Clark was pretty much a jam-hole.

by dangjackson on Dec 20, 2006 1:19 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

It's weird how these things are, I like Andruw Jones and Manny Ramirez. * shrug *

I second the Pedro Feliz nomination. I don't think I've ever hated a Giant as much.

DFA Everybody

by JakeS on Dec 20, 2006 1:24 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Not even Alex Sanchez?

by tk on Dec 20, 2006 1:53 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Sanchez wasn't here that long. Fleas had 644 PAs last season...each and every single one painful to the psyche, eyes, stomach.

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 20, 2006 2:00 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Not even Steve MotherF'n Finley?

by North Side Chicago Expatriate Giants Fan on Dec 21, 2006 10:32 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Whatever Finley did yto piss us off is offset by the great job he did at not being Edgardo. He gets a pass.

Biggest mankinder in the history of no brain.

by Goofus on Dec 21, 2006 11:34 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

I forget, why do we hate Allen Watson?

by dangjackson on Dec 20, 2006 1:59 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Because he said he was going to "get" Dusty, who we now also dislike.

by Grant on Dec 20, 2006 2:18 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

I didn't know he said that, and I already hated him with a white-hot passion.

by tobias on Dec 20, 2006 4:24 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Kirk Gibson...He shoulda stayed with the Tigers. Anybody that pays tribute to lasorda is a sell-out

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 20, 2006 2:07 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

He was one of those guys who got all indignant when traded and engaged in a bunch of I-was-stabbed-in-the-back junior high school rhetoric, warning that the Giants batters shouldn't dig in at the plate. He always seemed to have an overly high opinion of himself, too. Self confidence is nice, but not when it reaches the level of self myopia.

cue: theme from "The Natural"

by VidaWantsYourCar on Dec 20, 2006 2:19 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

the above post refers to Watson, of course, not Gibson. Too slow on the draw.

cue: theme from "The Natural"

by VidaWantsYourCar on Dec 20, 2006 2:20 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

I apologize if I missed this one above, but what about Kevin Brown? That guy always seemed to shut down the Giants no matter what team he was with, and carried himself like an arrogant a-hole while doing it, the sure fire way to end up on lists like this. I would like punch him in the neck.

by out machine on Dec 20, 2006 4:25 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Biggest oversight on my list....

...damn.

by Grant on Dec 20, 2006 4:57 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Biggest oversight on my list....

Just so long as you don't take Juden off your next list. Remember when he was like, "I'm ba-aaack," after shutting down the Giants in a game after getting run out of town. God, he was a supreme turd.

by out machine on Dec 20, 2006 5:14 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Juden is, w/out a doubt, the #1 starter....

by Grant on Dec 20, 2006 6:28 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Eric Show. (Also John Birch, too, weird.)

by dangjackson on Dec 20, 2006 4:31 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

If John Birch membership is a requirement, then we've gotta go with Craig Lefferts, who also insisted on sprinting to the mound when summoned from the bullpen. There is no way anyone does that naturally; that is a contrived move to make people say "Wow, love the hustle in that guy. Why doesn't [star player X] do that?"

Answer: because he doesn't have to.

cue: theme from "The Natural"

by VidaWantsYourCar on Dec 20, 2006 4:58 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

By coincidence I have made a list of my all time hated baseball players, in order:
Chipper Jones
Russ Springer
A.J. Pierzynsky
JD Drew
Roger Clemens
Curt Schilling
Jeff Kent
sammy sosa
Derek Jeter
Eric Gagne
Scott Spiezio
Jeff Weaver
Deion Sanders
Mark Prior
Mike Piazza
John Rocker
Ricky Ledee
Ila Borders
Jose Lima
Rafael Furcal
Bret Boone
Ryan Klesko
Kevin Millwood
Steve Finley
Brett Tomko
Milton Bradley
Bronson Arroyo
Hee Seop Choi
Johnny Damon
Luis Gonzalez
Ruben Rivera
Frank Rodriguez
Kerry Ligtenberg
Scott Feldman
John Smoltz
Mark Wohlers
Carlos Perez
Cory Lidle
Hideki Matsui
Eric Karros
Andruw Jones
Wayne Franklin
Jeff Blauser
Tom Glavine
Duaner Sanchez

Felipe: "I'm thinking if having Bonds hit leadoff. Or eight. No, wait, pitching. Anyway, I haven't talked to him about it yet

by theclap on Dec 20, 2006 4:52 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

wow, hating the recently deceased. You're hardcore.

If worms had daggers, birds wouldn't f*ck with 'em

by the degenerate on Dec 20, 2006 5:36 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Lidle said he has a serious problem with Bonds and his alleged steroid use... problem solved! But I do admit he got bumped down significantly due to the pity factor

Felipe: "I'm thinking if having Bonds hit leadoff. Or eight. No, wait, pitching. Anyway, I haven't talked to him about it yet

by theclap on Dec 20, 2006 7:09 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

You hate Ila Borders?

Read SFDugout. It'll make you a better person.

by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Dec 20, 2006 8:24 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Of this list, the ones who I also hate (read, negatively passionate, as opposed to just plain negative):

A.J. Pierzynsky
Curt Schilling
Jeff Kent
Eric Gagne
Scott Spiezio
Jeff Weaver
Mike Piazza
John Rocker
Ricky Ledee
Steve Finley
Brett Tomko
Johnny Damon
Luis Gonzalez

I'm not sure how you could hate some of those guys on your list. Sosa I can guess why, but he's so happy and likes everybody! I respect Jeter too much to knock him. What did Mark Prior ever do to anybody except give hope to a bunch of Cubs fans and then rip it away mercilessly with glass tendons (glass tendons? that has to be a faulty image)? What's wrong with that? The rest I'm pretty indifferent about, but this seems like a pretty harsh list.

Coming to you by proxy

by howtheyscored on Dec 20, 2006 9:27 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Prior pegged Bonds, a day after Bonds had been pegged in the same series, and taunted Bonds after, as a rookie

Felipe: "I'm thinking if having Bonds hit leadoff. Or eight. No, wait, pitching. Anyway, I haven't talked to him about it yet

by theclap on Dec 20, 2006 9:46 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Mental note:

Stay on theclap's good side. theclap has a brutal memory.

Another mental note: stay away from The Clap.

"Robb Nen is going to get you" - Benito Santiago to Chipper Jones, 10/7/02

by Pants Man on Dec 20, 2006 11:32 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Mental note:

Brutal memory indeed. Very well, Mr. Clap, I concede.

Coming to you by proxy

by howtheyscored on Dec 21, 2006 12:59 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

I don't think its possible to partially hate a guy. You either hate them with a passion or you don't hate them at all. Clap had a good list and didn't hold back, which is what hating is all about.

We'd be pretty good if we didn't suck so bad.

by nostocksjustbonds on Dec 21, 2006 10:23 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

It's not that I partially hate. There're the guys up there who I hate, and then a bunch who I regular old don't like. That's a legitimate difference. That's all I meant.

Coming to you by proxy

by howtheyscored on Dec 21, 2006 2:06 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

And of coarse...........VizII

"In the Autumn of his Winter, comes man's last mad surge of youth".

by Ghost11 on Dec 20, 2006 5:10 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Eckersley.

Oro en Paz, Fierro en Guerra. Feliz grounds out.

by HughG16 on Dec 20, 2006 5:26 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Eric Byrnes Steve Lyons lite
Ricky Henderson Referring to yourself always in the third person or first person plural is pretentious. Also for killing the Giants in the 89 WS

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 20, 2006 6:24 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

you must really hate Dave Stewart.

We'd be pretty good if we didn't suck so bad.

by nostocksjustbonds on Dec 21, 2006 10:17 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Candy was not Dandy

Candy Maldonando, basically for his Jose Canseco intepretation of "How Not to Play the Outfield" in the 87 League Championship. I still believe he cost us a spot in the Series that year, as no one was hitting Dave Dravecky that day!

And I have to disagree with the Dave Dravecky call. He kept his religious meanderings to a minimum and that man is one of the toughest men I've ever seen play this game. I was listening to the Giants/Expos game when he shattered his arm. Even over the radio it sounded like a gunshot. And I still have the ticket stub from the comeback game he pitched against the Reds.

My two favorite teams are the Giants, and whomever is playing the Dodgers!

by World Series or Bust on Dec 20, 2006 6:41 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Candy was not Dandy

My wife was in labor the night Dravecky came back against the Reds (8/10/89). I ran downstairs between contractions to see the highlights and missed one contraction. I haven't heard the end of it since.

It was worth it though. Great start.

by JKGiants on Dec 20, 2006 8:19 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

I hate everybody.

If they're not Giants, they will play well against the Giants and win.

If they are Giants, they will suck and the Giants will lose.

So I just hate everyone.

You're nobody 'til everybody in
this town thinks you're a bastard - Elvis Costello

by EliminateMe on Dec 20, 2006 11:02 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Pedro Guererro and Steve Sax

I really hated those a-holes.

We'd be pretty good if we didn't suck so bad.

by nostocksjustbonds on Dec 21, 2006 10:19 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Pedro Guererro and Steve Sax

But at least we all got to see their careers fall apart before our very eyes: Pete not being able to field a ground ball, Sax not being able to throw the ball from second to first.

Man, this thread is cruel.

cue: theme from "The Natural"

by VidaWantsYourCar on Dec 21, 2006 10:28 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Pedro Guererro and Steve Sax

In the middle of a brutal losing streak, several of which have come on 9th inning errors by the Dodger infield, Lasorda gathers his troops for a team meeting and preaches the importance of being mentally prepared for any play.

"Okay, Pete," he says, turning to Pedro Guerrero, "it's the 9th inning, men on 1st and 2nd, 1 out, and we're up by a run. What's going through your mind?"

Guerrero hesitates, then admits, "I'm thinking I hope they don't hit it to me."

Lasorda, incredulous: "WHAT?!" Fumbling for way to reply to this Cardinal sin, Tommy asks "Is that it, Pete? Are you thinking any thing else?"

Guerrero says "well, I'm hoping they don't hit it to Sax, either."

Greatest. Baseball. Story. Ever.

by Roger on Dec 21, 2006 10:53 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

so now ben maller is saying that if the mariners sign zito, they could trade sexson or beltre. possibly to the dodgers.

sexson would have been a great fit for us - instead sabean gets klesko. if the mariners get zito and trade sexson to the dodgers, i would say that is probably the worst possible thing that could happen to us - we lose out on a starting pitcher, we get a washed up 1B, and the 1B we should have gone after goes to LA.

great job sabean.

by benson11 on Dec 21, 2006 10:59 AM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Trade Beltre to the Dodgers?

Read SFDugout. It'll make you a better person.

by BaronVonCurrentEvents on Dec 21, 2006 11:09 AM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

why would the dodgers want lurch mcpurch? they already nonads and kent? i've never been sold on sexson anyway... he seems another kingman with a slightly better attitude. just watching him he looks like righthanded damon minor...some guys are simply too big for this game.

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 21, 2006 4:28 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Home plate umpire

Andy Fletcher. I'm sure there are many other great candidates, but Fletcher is one of the few umpires I know by name, which is NOT a good thing. The one incident I remember him for was a game where he picked a fight with Benito a few years back. Santiago was in his crouch facing the mound while debating a ball/strike call with Fletcher. Fletcher comes out of his crouch to "dust of the plate", gets in Benito's face and Benny ends up getting tossed. Ever since that game, whenever Andy Fletcher is shown as an ump of a game we are watching my little bro chimes in with "aghh I hate that guy." Since the Benito episode I have seen him pull similar stunts at least a dozen times.

Any other umps for the squad?

Vote for Pedro...to be DFA'd!

by W8ingForATitle on Dec 21, 2006 12:46 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Home plate umpire

yeah....the jerk who got spit on by bobby alomar in the world series -- narc hirchbeck..

angel "look at me" hernandez,
bruece froemming the guy makes thighler look slim.

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 21, 2006 4:31 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Home plate umpire

we'll need a new thread to start on the umps that we hate, and those guys would head the list.

We'd be pretty good if we didn't suck so bad.

by nostocksjustbonds on Dec 21, 2006 5:50 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Home plate umpire

Las Diaz
Eric Gregg
Bob Davidson
Angel Hernandez

If you whine about Liriano, I will .gif you.

by Fog City Blues on Dec 21, 2006 8:09 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Prelude to a goof

Bob Welch, Mark Portugal, and Mike Scott.

The Dodgers are evil.

by irwin on Dec 21, 2006 1:23 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Slow day

Man, it's deathly quiet today. We need some excitement like a Zito signing or a Benitez trade to liven things up. If something doesn't happen soon, I'm going to go streaking through the quad...and then the lobby of McCovey Chronicles.

C'mon! Who's with me?

Biggest mankinder in the history of no brain.

by Goofus on Dec 21, 2006 2:22 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

Re: Slow day

Zito traded Benitez a Livan Hernandez donruss for a Sean Estes Fleer and Jeff Kent Topps rookie card

Save The Pitcher. Save The World

by E Ticket on Dec 21, 2006 4:32 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

Re: Slow day

I would have to say Zito got the better end of that deal. I guess MLB pitchers don't want to be left out in the getting over on Armada sweepstakes.

Vote for Pedro...to be DFA'd!

by W8ingForATitle on Dec 22, 2006 12:03 PM PST up reply actions 0 recs

I know I'm late to the party

but seriously - Steve Trachsel, Steve Trachsel, Steve Trachsel.

In the time it took me to read this thread, Steve Trachsel thought about making a pitch, then decided against it, then thought about it some more, then made himself an omelette, then thought some more about making a pitch, then took a nap.

That he has ownage on the Giants is icing on the cake.

If you whine about Liriano, I will .gif you.

by Fog City Blues on Dec 21, 2006 8:05 PM PST reply actions 0 recs

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